Going For The Bad Boy | completed

Chapter Forty Six

His lips were on mine.

I didn't kiss back.

I was shocked.

He said he loves me.

Love.

I didn't realise we were at that stage yet.

Parker said he loved me too.

I practically ran for the hills.

Chad realised I wasn't going to kiss back and he pulled back, his face full of regret. "I shouldn't have said that, should I?" I wanted to answer, tell him I loved him back. But I couldn't. I didn't know how I felt. I knew I really liked him a lot, but I didn't know if I was at that stage yet. Do I love him? "Crap, Riley, forget I said that. Please? I don't want things awkward between us," he whispers, frowning slightly. "Princess, say something."

"I want to say it back," I start off, pulling away completely from him, "but I don't know if I'm there yet."

"I'm sorry," he murmurs, trying to hold my hands but I step back. "Riley, don't. I'm sorry."

"I need to go," I say, quickly running off. I heard Chad calling my name but I refused to acknowledge him. I didn't know how to respond to that. My boyfriend tells me he loves me and I run away. Great, I've screwed this all up. Haven't I?

I got back to campus and raced to my room, bumping into Parker. "Riley-"

"Not now, Parker," I groan out. Just my luck, I bump into the other guy who loves me. I run into my room and as I expected, Parker sadly followed me. "Parker, I said not now."

"You look upset," he observes as he closes my door. He pushes me lightly on the bed, making me sit down. He sits beside me. "What's happened?"

"I don't know if I love Chad yet," I admit. Key word was yet. I knew I'd fall in love with him soon, but I don't know if I'm there. I'm scared he will leave me because I haven't said it back.. What if he does? "He dropped the L bomb on me."

"He did what?" I could tell Parker was getting jealous, but I didn't care right now. My heart was sinking at the thought of Chad leaving me be used of that. "Do you think of him when you wake up and go to sleep?" I nod my head. "When you see certain things, does it remind you of him?" I nod again. It was true. Every time I saw a motorcycle, I thought of him. It wasn't just that, though. "Do you think you'll be with him in, say I don't know, five years?" I nod again. I could see it. I could see us together and the thought of not being win him crushed me.

"I think of him even when I'm asleep. Every time I close my eyes, I see his face looking down at me. When I sleep I replay memories of us. Don't get me wrong, I don't have wet dreams or anything, just the sweet stuff we do. I can't shake him out of my mind and I think of him all the time. When I'm not with him, I really want nothing more than to be by his side."

"Ew you sound in love," he says, making vomiting sounds. I look at him, unimpressed. He grins and bursts out laughing, and I find myself doing so too. "How you been? Other than this," he asks and I tell him I've been good. But I don't talk about myself for long because I divert the conversation to how he's coping and doing. He tells me he's doing great and he feels better now. I made him promise me he wouldn't do such a thing again. He did. "Man, I missed talking to you," he admits, putting an arm around my shoulder.

"I've missed talking to you too," I tell him. "I suppose it was more my fault. After finding out about your feelings for me, and then Chad..I'm sorry, I should've made more of an effort." It was true, I should have. I shouldn't have pushed him away but I felt awkward knowing he fell for me and I didn't reciprocate the feelings.