Book Of Phan One Shots

Dear Daniel

"Dear Daniel,

I sit here on my bed thinking about the moment we met all those yeas ago. 

October 19 2009

I will never forget it, engrained in my brain forever.  For however long my body will exist it will hold that moment.  The first time I held you in my arms and I felt all those broken pieces being pressed together indefinitely.  You always tell me that I saved you but I don't think i'd be here today without you.

I'll never forget the pain that clung on so tight the moment I had to say goodbye.  That feeling has never subsided, the pain.  When you leave that is.  It still haunts me but i've learned to fight it for the most part.

How we spent days and nights videochatting.  I learned so much about you during that time. 

But mostly I learned that you were special to me.  Little did I know that you'd be the only special thing I needed.

And I will forever remember your warm breath on my neck the first time you muttered those three words and how I cried.  I sobbed like a little baby and you were so worried, I still remember the wrinkles on your forehead.  I laughed and said it back and I hugged you again, this time tighter.   The snow fell around us but the cold wasn't bothersome, we were warm enough in each others embrace. 

Or how you visited my family for the first time and how they all fell in love with you.  That was nice.

When we finally moved in was one of my favorite memories.  I love the way you would scold me when I bought something useless. (i'm sorry for all the houseplants but you know I have to.)

Or how we finally found a decent job with BBC and you hugged me once again, tears in your eyes.  All of your worries seemed to melt away.  I felt a weight lifted off my shoulder as well.  We didn't have to worry about paying bills or food or anything anymore.

Then we moved again and that was magical.  This time it was different, we were young kids back then but the second time we seemed grown up. 

Growing up.

I watched you grow up in front of me and if that isn't the best thing to ever happen to anyone than I don't know what is.

I watched as you grew, not only in height but in character.  You really became a wonderful person and I see you continue to grow everyday.  I watched your hair shorten and your love grow.  The first year or two we dated I could lean over and kiss your head.  There is still a part of me that missed that.

Now we get to the past year.  We wrote a book and captured all of these moments on paper and I know we left out more personal details but honestly words could never capture those moments anyway.  We toured and you did your documentary and I saw you stressed.  I saw you neck deep in work but you always found moments to remind me of why I fell in love with you.  I am very grateful of that.

And now you stand in front of me, our families and friends watching and I just want to say I love you.  I want everyone to know I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

I know I used to say marriage was never in my plan, that I could never see myself with anyone forever. But you just had to come along, didn't you Daniel?

I love you and I want to live happily ever after with you, because you're my best friend and I love you."

"Now say I do and kiss me."  Dan grins, tears in his eyes.