Spiritus

Spiritus (Chapter Eight)

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Chapter Eight

"You what?" I sputtered, my eyes wide in disbelief.

"I said I love you." He lowered his voice a little, his intense blue eyes bore into my chocolate ones. My mouth hung open. So he chose to tell me that after I went on the date with Mike? Seriously?

"Cooper-"

"Don't say it." He held his hand up and walked over to me. I gasped when he reached out for my arm and his grip was solid. Oh my gosh. I could feel him. But how? He was still dead. He still had some mistiness to his form. I yanked my arm away.

"Don't touch me." I whispered harshly. My arm was tingling where he had been holding it.

"What's your problem?" I flinched away from the hurt look in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Cooper. But, I like Mike. A lot."

"You may like him, but you love me. I know you do-"

"As a friend. Nothing more. I've never loved you as more than that, and honestly; I never will." I'd always been a good liar, and the crushed look he was giving me proved it. I hated hurting him more than anything, but he hurt me even worse by choosing to confess his love for me right then. He had plenty of time to do it before he died, after he died even. But, no, he had to wait until I was already falling for Mike. Too late, Cooper. Too late.

He opened his mouth to say something, but I stopped him. "Just leave. Please."

"Mila-"

"Go!" My voice broke and a tear slipped from my eye. Anger quickly passed over his face, then pure devastation before he spoke again.

"Fine." He whispered, fading away quickly. As soon as he was gone I sank to the floor, sobs racking through my body as I cried silently into my hands. How could he do this to me? I waited so long to hear those words come out of his mouth, and he just had to pick a time like that. Did he not understand that we could never be together? We were just too different. And if I kept on healthily, I wouldn't die for a good fifty or maybe even sixty years more. Hearing him say he loved me hurt worse than leaving it unsaid.

I shouldn't have yelled at him, though. I should've just been nice and told him I needed some time to myself; that he needed to leave. He probably wouldn't want to come back now. How could I be so stupid? Just because he chose an incredibly inconvenient time to confess he loves me, doesn't mean I should just freak out like that. I still wanted him around.

I pulled my knees up to my chest and rocked back and forth as I slowly started to calm down. The waterfall of tears had become a slow trickling stream down my cheeks. Everything was just so messed up. If Cooper hadn't died, I'd be with him; but now that he has died he wants me and I want Mike. Teen love is so complicated.

My phone started buzzing beside me and I realized I'd dropped it during the confrontation with my best friend. If he even is my best friend anymore. I thought to myself. I checked the lit up screen and saw Mike's name. After taking a steadying breath I clicked the answer button.

"Hello?" I mumbled, fighting to keep my voice from breaking.

"Mila are you okay?" Mike's deep voice was full of concern and I couldn't help but smile a little.

I inhaled deeply, "Yeah, I'm fine. What's up?" I forced myself to sound cheerful and happy.

"I just got bored and figured I'd see if you were still awake." I pictured him laying across his bed, wearing jeans and loose football t-shirt, being his normal gorgeous self.