You Buckled Up Your Heart

Heavydirtysoul❥17

"So, are you guys like dating?" Debby asked, Josh was standing behind her, with his arms around her waist.

"Dating, well, we never, umm," Jenna stuttered.

"We just kissed, a couple times, what is it like 4 times now?" Tyler turned to Jenna.

"Um, maybe it's 3, I actually have no idea!" She replied giggling a little, even though the conversation was making she uncomfortable.

"So, what your saying is you have lost count of how many times you've kissed, but you're not exactly dating?" Josh confirmed.

"Yes." She and Tyler said in unison.

"Oh my god, just date!" Anna exclaimed. "You know you like each other, hell, you've kiss multiple times!"

"Yeah, what are you waiting for?" Mark added.

Jenna and Tyler remained silent. She didn't know what they were waiting for. She had to admit by now that there was a good chance Tyler did like her, but there was always something in the back of her mind say what if?

What if he's just using you? What if he just wants sex like Bryan? What if this is all a prank? What if it's a bet? And worst of all, what if he does like you, for now, but once you've really fallen for him, he decides he's done?

All of these thoughts ran through her head ever night before she falls asleep. To enter into a relationship with someone is to trust them completely, and she just wasn't sure if she'd ever trust someone completely. There are too many variables that could end things, and she didn't want to have someone she cared for as much as she cared for Tyler to be gone.

"I don't know," She heard Tyler mumbled beside her. The phrase both comforted her and scared her. On one hand, she was glad Tyler was obviously trying to change the subject, but on the other it scared her that he was obviously trying to subject, maybe he really didn't like her like that.

"Whatever, we'll let the two of you figure it out," Debby sighed, "and when you figure out that you like each other, will you please tell us?"

"Sure, why not?" Tyler laughed, Jenna chuckled nervously next to him, wringing her hands behind her back. This whole conversation was stressing her out, way more than homework ever would.

"Um, I forgot something up at the house, I will be back soon." Jenna chirped nonchalantly, trying not to appear way less anxious then she was. She turned and began to jog in the direction of the house, but once she knew she was out of sight from the clearing they were camping at, she turned and sprinted towards the left, no idea where she was going.

After about five minutes of running away, she collapsed against a tree, trying to catch her breath. She couldn't. The panic she had initially felt, that made her run in the first place, became overwhelming. Her breath was coming in short, and fast, she was becoming dizzy, and her whole whole body was trembling. Jenna knew this feeling all too well, she had experienced it many times over the summer, but this was the first of the school year. "Not now." She thought.

" I can't breath, I can't breath, I can't breath," She kept repeating over and over, but she didn't know if it was out loud, or in her head.

"I'm dying, oh my god, I'm going crazy" It felt like it would never stop, She was utterly terrified for no reason at all. Bringing her knees up to her chest, and burying her head within them, she waiting for the horrible thoughts, and feelings to subside.

Jenna didn't know how long she sat there with her head in her legs, but when she finally lifted her head, dark was beginning to settle in.

"Shit" She whispered. she had no idea where she was, and now she had to get back to everyone before it got totally dark and she was lost in the woods. Quickly wiping her face with her hands, she felt how wet with tears her cheeks were. Jenna had no idea when she had started crying during that mess, but it didn't matter now, she had to go.

She began to walk in the direction she came, then she quickly realized, that she had no idea if this was the direction she came in or not. She was lost. And the only thing she knew to do was to stay put, hug a tree, sit and wait all alone with you heavydirtysoul, and hope your friends find you. 

This was bad, if they even managed to find her, and bring her back to the clearing, she was going to have to make up some excuse as to why she was gone for so long. This was the lowest moment of her school year so far.

So far, there were much lower moments to come.

a/n- Hello! Hope you enjoyed this, I'll admit, rather short update, thanks for reading! :*

Stay Alive |-/