You Buckled Up Your Heart

Friend, Please❥1

Jenna sighed gently closing her laptop, and checked her phone for the hundredth time, checking to see if Caitlyn replied to her text, she didn't, of course, but Jenna had hoped anyway, stupid. On the other hand Anna had answered, she always did, and she decided to be thankful for that. Sending her back a simple "What's up" text back, Jenna leaned back on her bed. Pulling out her headphones, she tried not to think about Caitlyn, or Madison, or even Laura for that matter, they weren't her friends, she knew that now, it still sucked. Jenna selected a song she had been listening to a lot lately called 'UGH!' by the 1975, it always put her in a good mood. Today it didn't. Jenna could feel tears beginning to dampen her eyes.

"Stop it, stop it, stop it!" She whispered to herself, like that would help. Jenna couldn't stop it even if she tried to. She had been crying a lot lately, and she was sick of it. After about five minutes of furious sobbing, she finally calmed down a bit. Jenna needed to take a walk, clear her mind, so she hopped off her bed, and grabbed an outfit from her closet, and threw it on. She observed her outfit in the mirror, ripped, black skinny jeans, a grey acid wash tee, and a black beanie. Her blond hair her fell just past her shoulders, underneath the hat, her blue bits of hair popped on her outfit. She used to adore the blue, but the past few months she hadn't been so sure about it. Jenna getting a good look at herself, Jenna decided she looked totally unapproachable, exactly what she was going for. She really didn't want anyone to talk to her. On her way out of her room, she grabbed a pair of black sunglasses, the weather might be misty, but there was nothing she hated more than when someone noticed your red, puffy eyes, and stared at you. It wasn't like they were going to figure out why you were crying from staring at you, so why do it.

"Mom, I'm going for a walk!" She yelled as came down the stairs, two at a time.

"Okay, be back for supper though, around six!" Her mom called from the kitchen.

"Kay!" Jenna pulled the door open, and breathed in the fresh air. The calming fresh air. Shutting the door tightly behind her, Jenna began to walk to toward the park, she loved the park, it was so peaceful, and she could just walk around, and forget herself there.

Jenna walked along the twisting pathway in the park. Usually Jenna would take this time to listen to music, or sit with her sketch pad draw something, but today was different. She was going to force her to think about her fri- those people, and try and figure some stuff out. Of course she didn't figure anything out though, she just came up with more questions, the first one being what the hell happened?

Jenna had become friends with Caitlyn, Madison, and Laura at the beginning of grade ten, and everything was great. They all seemed to understand her, they laughed with her, and they had a lot in common, for that entire year they were inseparable, they did everything together . It felt like one of those perfect little friendships you read about in books, but those aren't real, and apparently neither was this one.

After the summer, grade eleven started, and everything seemed fine. They were still together every moment, but then Madison came to the lunch table one with a girl they had all known from the year before, but never really talked to. Her name was Ally, Jenna didn't really know her at all, but that was by choice. Jenna had always found Ally sort of fake, and she gossiped way too much, but Madison seemed to like her for some reason. Everyday, Ally continued to eat with them, then started tagging along on their outings. Ally had become a permanent member of their little group, and Jenna wasn't too thrilled, but she dealt with it. Ally never took it upon herself to talk to Jenna, and Jenna herself was never in the mood to strike up a conversation with her either, so they never spoke.

After a few months it was December, and Jenna was starting to notice changes, Madison was becoming much more distant, and whenever Jenna tried to talk to her, she seemed to always be in a rush to end the conversation, the others followed her lead. Within a few weeks, whenever they all sat at their lunch table together, everyone was talking except Jenna. They were talking about something she didn't know about, or laughing at something she didn't understand. One day she sat there, while they all made plans to hang out, without her. Pretty soon, Jenna was never invited to hang out at all.