Wallflower

Chapter 3

Chapter 3

After only sleeping about 4 hours, I was awake by 8 in the morning. I walked out to the living room and into the kitchen and saw my mom standing there. She was still dressed up, so she had obviously just gotten home.

"Hi mom.", I hugged her.

"Hey honey. How're you?", she hugged me back.

"Good. Tired. Hungry."

"I brought donuts because I assumed Janet would be here too."

"She's upstairs." I suddenly felt my pounding headache.

"Were you okay while I was gone? Did you go to school everyday?"

"Yes and yes. I was fine." I forced a smile.

She always asked these questions. Ever since the beginning of my sophomore year, when I was able to be alone again, but I still wasn't going to school and I took the first half of that year online. She had to leave for work for 2 days, and I was to be all by myself at home and I couldn't leave under any circumstances. The phone rang, and I wasn't even supposed to answer it. But I did.

"Hello?"

"Who is this?", the voice said. It must've been his one of only very few phone calls.

"Louisa.", I whispered back because that was the voice I was always terrified of. It was the voice I never want to hear again, ever.

"Where the hell is your mom?"

"Work."

"Call her. I want to talk to her."

"I can't."

"Why the fuck not?"

"I'm not supposed to use the phone."

"Then why are you on it now? You know what, you're 16, you can use the god damn phone. I ought to beat the shit out of you, now connect me to your mother!" I heard someone in the background say, "Christopher, stop screaming. Who's on the phone with you?"

I didn't even answer him. I clicked the off button with a shaky hand and slammed the phone on the table and ran to my room. I slammed the door and stood there against it. From there all I could feel were the old poundings of fists on the other side yelling incoherent words at me. I put my hands over my ears and breathed heavily as I slid down to the ground and rocked back and forth. "Stop stop stop stop...", I whispered to myself. "Stop!", I screamed as I jumped up and flung open the door. I ran to grab the phone and sat on the floor in the middle of the kitchen as I listened to the subtle ringing.

"Hello?", she answered.

"Mom, why does he hate me? What did I ever do?", I panted trying to catch my breath.

"Louisa, what're you talking about? You're not supposed to be using the phone."

"He called. He wanted to talk to you. What should I do? I don't even understand.", I took a deep breath. "What did I do, mom?", I yelled.

"Nothing, Louisa, nothing. It's all fine. It's not like he was there."

"But what if he was? If he was it would be like every other time." I wrapped my arm around my knees that were to my chest and cried.

"Louisa, what do you want me to do?"

"I don't know!", I screamed.

"I'm coming home. Stay where you are and I'll be there in 2 hours. Maybe eat something? Take your mind off of it. Don't hang up the phone."

She couldn't leave for work for another month. It was all my fault we didn't have money at that time and I hated it all. We had no support or extra money and what we had, was wasted on me. My mom had just started saving money again and I ruined it all. I just wanted things back to normal. I wanted everyone there and happy.