Theo (Boyxboy)(Trans)

Chapter Seven

Staring at my reflection, I pull the long-sleeved sweatshirt over my freshly bound chest and tug on an extra hoodie for warmth and to prevent Reed from seeing even the slightly remaining bump of my chest. Looking in the mirror, I feel somewhat satisfied. Other than the maroon sweat shirt, I have on a pair of dark denim pants that fit nicely, but not nearly as tight as women's jeans. I even pulled on my old pair of beat up vans and threw on a couple of Lane's leather bracelet's that I stole off him last time we hung out. 

The last thing I add to the ensemble is a beanie to pull back my short, chin length locks. Looking at my reflection harshly, I can't help but feel the anxiety eating at me. I don't know what I'm going to say to Reed to explain my absence, and what if he sees right through me? He's been around Theresa quite a lot lately, what if he can tell the difference now? Do I really look guy-ish enough? Last time he didn't look for long, what if he can tell it's just the clothes?

I try to breathe despite the lump in my throat, but it's painful to do so. I wish this wasn't a lie. I wish I could just be the boy I know I am, then maybe I could just be worrying about if he'll find me attractive and we could have a normal friendship and maybe more.

I shake my head, knowing that it's just stupid, wishful thinking and that I need to quit stalling and get to the courts and face the music. I got myself in this mess, it's time to clean it up. Whether that means I come up with a believable lie, or... I end up having no choice but to reveal the truth and lose him for good. 

Standing outside the fence that wraps around the school yard, I can already see Reed standing with his back to me, dribbling the ball lazily before jogging up to the net and sinking it in effortlessly. I know I should call out to him, but I can't help but get caught up in how... pretty he is. Yes, I know it sounds strange, but there truly is something pretty about this boy. He's manly in every sense-- from the built up muscles, strong jaw, broad shoulders and just... this manliness about him. However, something in the soft appearance of his skin, and gentle eyes make him look like a beautiful piece of art.

I blush at my own thoughts and shake my head as I make my way through the gate. He doesn't notice me until I'm just a few feet from him until his eyes glance at me sideways and then again as he jumps at my sudden presence. "Crap, you scared me."

I smile and let out a nervous laugh, "Sorry."

"Don't worry 'bout it," He says easily, tossing me the ball. "I was beginning to think you wouldn't show."

I nibble my lip, staring down at the ball that I turn over in my hands, "I had to sneak out, so I waited until my mom was caught up in her nightly tv binge."

He chuckles at that, taking a few steps away from the court towards the benches, and I catch the hint as I move the ball under my arm and follow after him slowly, "So, what did you-"

"I'm sorry," I hear myself blurt, cutting his off his sweet voice and the air entering my lungs. "I-I mean... not texting you back a-and just, I wasn't truly trying to avoid you, I-I just... it's complicated."

His eyes look hard as he stares me down, and I can feel myself nearly crumbling with guilt as I'm so ready to just confess and let him get mad at me so this can all be over, but when his expression softens and that sweet smile of his blesses me, the words all but stop dead in my throat.

"I'm sure you had your reasons. If you want to talk about it, I have no problem listening. Maybe there's something I can help you with? I just... I was so worried I'd done something to make you mad at me," He admits as he drops down on the bench, rubbing the back of his neck casually.