Chapter 32: Post-Panic

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Clay POV.

As I sat in the car staring through the window I thought about what was going on. Suddenly, because the audience and Jimmy wanted it, I was going to be staying here until further notice as a rebound for George. All of my associates were being informed and I was going to be staying with Niki for the time being.

Neither of us spoke, Niki was focusing on driving and I was continuing to memorise the streets around me. I was already quite familiar with them from watching the show for a large portion of my life, but it was different actually travelling down it.

A voice cut through the silence of the car. “You will need to be careful.” A woman said over the radio. “Karl has just had to calm down George from a full scale panic attack.”
“A panic attack?” I asked, the thoughts that had been in my mind immediately dissipating as I fearfully focused on the brunette.

“Karl is calming him.” The woman repeated, and I was worried however I didn’t say anything. I knew what Karl was like off of the cameras, and although this would happen on the camera I don’t think I would like it any more. “Just be aware of this when you arrive.”

This was just in time for the car pulling into the driveway. Karl’s car was parked on the side of the road, one that I also recognised from watching him alongside George for years. It annoyed me as I climbed out of the car without waiting for Niki and headed into the house. As I stepped into the door I called out to the brunette. “George! We’re home!”

It was quiet, no response, from George or from Karl. I pulled at my phone to glance at the footage that was currently playing, seeing the feed jumping between me and Niki as we entered the house, and George as he stood upstairs in conversation with Karl. He seemed as though he was not anywhere close to a panic attack and it annoyed me.

I opened the door of the bedroom, seeing the two brunettes inside. They turned to look at me and George’s expression turned into a grin. “You’re back!” But then he grew slightly more solemn. "How is your grandmother? Is she alright?" I remembered the excuse we had given and nodded, reassuring she'd be fine.

“George just had a panic attack.” Karl informed, lowering his gaze almost mournfully as he spoke. “I was in the neighbourhood to check up on him after the breakup anyway.”
“Karl, you didn’t have to say that.” George muttered with a blush.
“A panic attack?” I asked, as though I had no clue. “George, are you okay?”

“Yes… I’m fine now.” The two of us looked into one another’s eyes. I searched for any sign of dishonesty behind the beautiful honey brown eyes.
“That’s good to hear.” I said, smiling back at him. The two of us didn’t say anything more, but then he looked over at Karl.

“Hey… Karl… I wanted to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.” He said, giving a loving smile as he spoke to his best friend. “But would I be able to talk to Clay alone?” He asked, and I watched as the brunette cautiously nodded and walked out of the room.
“George?” I asked, looking at him.

He closed the distance, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and connecting our lips. I was taken aback by this, especially since he had had a panic attack recently. My hands moved to his hips, not pushing him away but not pulling him more into the kiss, just allowing him to do as he wished. As I held him and he moved against me the friction pulled up his shirt.

Eventually he pulled away, lips parted. “Clay, I think I love you,” He said, shocking me completely. “And I want to leave town.” His breath was uncertain.
“You want to leave town?” I asked. I didn’t have my earpiece in, I could only imagine how the people in charge were all reacting.

The brunette nodded, breaking away eye contact. “Yeah. I want to be able to have the chance to see outside of town, I’ve never left here before.”
“Well…” I hesitated, not sure exactly what to say or how to deal with this. “Maybe we could do that eventually, but not right now.”

“Why not?” He asked, seeming shocked. “This would be the perfect time to go. You are leaving in a few weeks and I just broke up with…”
“This is just a bit soon.” I told him. “I just arrived and I need to be here for Niki since she really loved Grandma. Plus I don’t think it would be best to remove you from your support system.”

The brunette seemed upset and so I gently took his hands in my own, guiding him to sit down on the bed. “I’m sorry Clay.” He said, his head lowered. One of his hands moved to rub at his face. “God, I sound like such an idiot. How do you even put up with me?”
“Because you are one of the kindest, most genuine people I have ever met.”

A hand moved to cup his cheek, brushing at his soft skin as he leaned into me. The feeling was nice, intimate, with me savouring the ability to touch someone who I had been watching and idolising for my whole life.

“Clay.” He tiredly whispered after a while, with me only giving a hum in response. His eyes had fluttered shut, fully embracing the tender feeling on his cheek. “Do you want to do something? I… it just feels wrong sitting here after this.”
“Sure.” I replied. “What is it that you are wanting to do?”

He just shrugged. “Something?” It was cautious, as though he wasn’t sure whether or not he was allowed to do anything. Honestly it was cute how sweet he was, especially in comparison to half of the other assholes on this show.

The brunette gave me one final kiss, a way of thanking me as he took a cautious step back. I directed him downstairs, telling him that we’d watch a movie and eat some snacks. Karl and Niki were talking in the kitchen, looking over to us as George walked to the couch.

He waited for me to sit down before settling himself alongside me, curling up with his head on my shoulder. I could feel the eyes of Niki and Karl and the millions of viewers on us. Neither of us spoke as he took the remote, opening the HomeStream app before passing it to me so I can find a movie.
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1129 words

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