Ten Sins || #Wattys2015

Chapter 190

If what we had was real, how could you be fine?...Cause I'm not fine at all..

Rebecca's POV

I slept in Louis's arms all night.

As comforting as it was, it didn't feel the same way as it felt when I layed with Harry.

Louis tries really hard to help me. He says that I can find my light again, but it doesn't have to be my love for Harry. He says my heart has a big hole, a hole that can't be healed.

Not even being an angel can help my status. Not even Harry's blood would help. I'll have to face the pain, no matter what. But the thing is; there's no pain.

Maybe my love for Harry never existed. Maybe I was too attached and addicted to him that I thought that I loved him. Maybe my strong feelings weren't love.

Bullshit.

I loved Harry, with all my being. But I don't anymore. I don't feel like I do. I thought I was his, always and forever, but I'm not. I can't be his if I don't love him. I can't be his if he keeps betraying me behind my back.

Foosteps came up the stairs and my bedroom's door opened, revealing Louis stepping inside and my other friend following from behind. Louis gave me a small smile as he stood in front of the bed that I couldn't quite give back. I shifted in my bed and leaned against the headboard, looking back and forth between the two of them.

"Hey cutie," Zayn greeted, giving me a smile.

"Hi." I said quietly. My voice was deeper thanks to the sobs last night. I was sobbing, but no tears were shed and I have no idea how that happened.

"Are you okay?" he asked, walking closer to me.

"Yes." I sighed.

"Louis told me what happened. You found out on your own or did he tell you?" he asked, causing my heart to clench.

"I found out." I replied flatly.

He gave me a small sad smile. "And you broke up..for good?"

"That's what I said."

"You should have done it much earlier." he muttered.

"Zayn." Louis warned.

I looked down at my hands. He's right. Zayn is right. I wasted so much time running behind Harry. I shouldn't have done that to myself.

"What? It's the truth." Zayn deffended.

"He's right." I murmured and they both looked at me.

"Alright, but you don't have to make her feel any worse than she already is." Louis said.

"He hurt you again, didn't he?" Zayn said and I looked up at him before nodding. He sighed and looked away, directing his glare elsewhere, hands fisting by his sides.

"I'm going to fucking kill him." Zayn growled. "But Rebecca, to be honest, you were playing with fire too." he looked at me. His words made my stomach tighten. "I've told you so many times not to be with him anymore. To leave him before you get hurt but you didn't listen. You saw that he's been acting weirdly but you kept staying next to him. You supported him over us and now you're here, heartbroken because of him and needing our help." his words made tears form into my eyes, making them sting.

"Zayn mate I think you should stop now." Louis cut in.

Zayn's caramel eyes never left mine. "Why did you do this to yourself, Becca? Why did you have to stay with him? Why did you have to break your heart for him? Now your light is gone inside of you! Now God knows if you still have the gift."