Don't Touch Me // Larry AU

"He Didn't Walk Out On Us. He Walked Out On Me."

When we got home I told the guys I needed some air and not to wait up. I poured a hot water bottle, grabbed some pillows and blankets, my iPod, a few torches, my thick coat and a water bottle.

I then followed the trail to the pond that was surrounded by many trees. It was secluded and what I needed. When I got there, I laid out a few blankets and pulled on my coat, I put the torches at four corners of the blankets and laid down, watching the stars.

After a while, the first one came followed by a million others that flooded in from all sides. Slowly and quietly I turned off the torches and laid back down on the blankets watching as the bright lights floated over me.

It was magical and my medicine. These fireflies, so perfect and bright gave me hope and filled me with peace. I lay for hours watching them float about. It made me wonder how something so small could be so beautiful and that led me to think about Louis. He was small and beautiful and I loved him. But I also hate him and I hated that I loved him. Everything was so messed up.

I laid back on the blankets and just watched the miracles above me float around. I relaxed. This is what I came up here for. Millions of them swarmed around me and I stayed absolutely still so as to not to disturb them.

After a while of watching the magic unfold above me I drifted into a peaceful sleep. Sometime after noon I was awoken.

Gemma had come out from the house with a flask. "Hey."

I sat up. "Hey."

Gemma sat down beside me, facing the dock and watching the waves. "Did you stay out all night?" She said extending one of the two flasks in her hand to me.

I nodded accepting the flask and taking a sip. The boiling coffee burnt my throat as it travelled down but I welcomed it. The warmth of the coffee fled to all parts of my body warming my toes and my torso.

After sitting in silence for a while, Gemma got up, dusted herself off and turned towards the house. "I'm going to head back in, come in when you're ready." I nodded and she hurried back in away from the cold.

I laid back down watching my breath as it came out in puffs of clouds. I clutched at the hot water bottle and brought it close to me letting the still warm water heat my cold body

After a many deep breaths, I stood up, gathered up my stuff and began to make my way back to the house.

When I entered, I heard the low buzz of the tv and Gemma's loud laugh. When they saw me, both Gemma and Ed who were sitting on opposite ends of the sofa turned to look at me, concern on their faces.

"Hi." I said putting my stuff on the sofa. I sat down with a thump and snuggled up next to Gemma.

"Hey, how was your night?" Ed said, looking out to where I had been.

"It was good, yeah. What did you do?" I asked snuggling into a cushion.

"We watched tv for a bit, mostly talked about the album and uni. Didn't stay up too late though, guess we was both tired." I hummed and then stood up quietly.

"I'm going to go sleep for a while, yeah. I'll see ya's later."

They both nodded and I walked down the bright hall and found my way to the master room where I collapsed onto my bed, fully clothed and sank into unconsciousness.

I was walking down a dark alley with a milk carton in my hand. Mum had complained about there being no milk for tea after a hard day at work so I decided to go get it for her. It was dark, almost midnight. I heard a noise behind me, I hurried my pace. I felt hands grab my waist, I dropped the milk. I was pushed against the wall, I cried. I couldn't breathe, I wanted to die. I heard homophobic slurs from drunk men, I was hurt.