IT ISN'T YOU

52| Awake and okay

Hours turned into days, and then days into weeks. It's been a while now, every day we wait for him to creak his eyes open and come back to life. Taehyung has been his whole cheery self but I could see his helplessness after waking up every day from the same hospital floor. Jimin must be struggling a lot in the darkness behind those closed eyes. He's physically better than before or that's what the doctors say. Every day we sit through the nurses checking his vitals. It's getting tiring to hear 'He's doing alright' so often.

Today is one of those days again. Taehyung sits with his back against one of the walls, head leaning back to stare at the ceiling, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders while his mind wanders off to who knows where. I don't think I'll be able to understand how tough it was and is for him. He lived with Jimin for a huge part of their lives. A twinge of pain twists in my chest. A part of me wishes I was there too, through his highs and lows. I want to be close to him like we were before, even if that was a short time.

Shaking my head I sigh, wishful thinking...sometimes gets you nowhere. Jimin and I are far away from what we once had. My eyes rake over him again, his chest falling and rising with a rhythm.

Let me help you Jimin, I won't mess up this time.

"What are you thinking about?" Taehyung breathes, shoulders heaving as he utters out the question. I scrunch my face in faux disgust, "Your breath smells." He scoffs, "As if, my morning breath smells like sunflowers mind you."

"Yeah, you just went out and chewed on sunflowers as if your life depended on it."

"Ugh, you're annoying."

I chuckle, folding my legs in, closer against my chest. "Sometimes it feels like, no matter what I do, everything just turns in the wrong way and it's not a pleasant feeling Tae." Picking at the strands of my jeans I wait for a reply but he remains silent waiting for me to continue.

"I don't even know, it's all messed up because of me. But I can't bring it in myself to conclude I'm the only problem. What you all did to me in the beginning, it was very uncomfortable and just weird. I don't even know why I just didn't report you all when I was forcefully dragged here. But I felt so bad, of all the rumors, Jimin was wrongly accused and none of it was his fault at all. Now, I'll try to make things right this time, without being a bother, but I will need your support, all of you have to put a little trust in me even if it doesn't seem like an ideal choice. It really won't be possible without you all."

Taehyung stays silent for a while, and this time the quiet hangs heavy between us, I've never dared to say this out loud until now, but it had been bothering me for a while. I was wronged but they were wronged too.

"I understand you, and you've been through some deep shit." He chuckled dryly. "Jin hyung was so in the wrong before, what he tried to do was despicable, but I would request you to see this from a different perspective then he was just a person who felt threatened that he would lose all what he spent years building. I'm not implying that this excuses anything, but Y/n I can't not be biased about him, about all of them who I've spent a good portion of my life with. Jin hyung and Namjoon hyung literally picked us all from shatters and put us together. So please," He takes a hold of my hands, glassed eyes looking back at me, "Let's do it correctly this time, solve all this. Together. I'll talk other through it."

I nod, and he removes his hands from mine, wiping his unshed tears. Standing up I stretch, "Wah, what's this gloomy atmosphere, get up, get up," Taehyung shakes his head and stands up, putting his blanket aside. "Let's get some ice-cream to cheer up."

Tae rolls his eyes, "Ice-cream in the morning? My mum would've beat my butt." Cracking knuckles I sigh, "Well you're not living with your mum, are you? Let's enjoy the glory of adult independence."

He laughs, nodding and making his way out. "Of course, only ice-cream can save us messed up humans."

******

"No, you would not believe me Jungkook, I'm telling you he willingly ordered 3 scoops and then sat minutes with head in his hands claiming brain freeze." I laugh incredulously at the phone screen as Taehyung smacks the back of my head. "Y/n, that was an attempt at murder. I am going to report you." Wincing I rub the back of my head.

Well, noona you did let him eat 3 whole scoops. Jungkook chimes from the screen.

"Who knew this man would've been such an armature." I tsk. Jungkook laughs and Taehyung makes a face while opening the hospital room's door. While Taehyung was busy throwing a tantrum of brain-freeze Jungkook had face-timed to check if Jimin was doing okay. All five of them were huddled around Jungkook trying to fit in one phone screen waiting the news of Jimin's awakening.

They all felt disappointed upon hearing the same old things and it pained me to see all of them scatter away with a sad look on their face. But we all were helpless in this situation, we could only hope the best for Jimin.

"Okay, but when are you all coming back?" He asked taking the phone from me, walking towards the windows. I plopped down on one of the stools beside Jimin's bed. My eyes caught onto the IV's attached to his hand. Tracing my finger on his hand I whispered, "Jimin, I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything. Why are we being like this, we used to get along, I believe we can get through this, help me out a little please, don't hate me, because it hurts Jimin. It really does. I sometimes hope we can go back to-"

I lift my head to his face and the rest of the sentence never makes it out of my mouth, because Jimin's eyes were once more on my face, blank and apathetic. My breath stuck in my throat I felt paralyzed. Time seemed to slow down and my chest started hurting. My vision got blurry as I struggled to say anything, something, to make sure this was real. Jimin was awake and okay.

"Y-You," My throat clogged on itself, "Jimin," I gasped, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I repeated over and over holding his hand. Tears fell uncontrollably and a loud gasp made it past my lips. Jimin's hand fell down on the sheets as I covered my mouth, Taehyung making his way over, worriedly asking if something was wrong. He froze once his eyes found Jimin's and a barely visible twitch on Jimin's lips gave away that he was trying to smile.

Hyung? Taehyung hyung, what happened? Jungkook asked.

"Jimin..." He whispered, trembling and eyes clouding over with tears for the second time today. "He woke up. He's okay."

A/N: Ahem. Instead of making excuses i would confess that i gave up on continuing this, wasn't planning to write this anymore and leave it as it is. But why do ya'll like this so much?
The support i've gotten is OVERWHELMING and every once in a while i received a message asking to upload this. It's been a rocky ride guys and I'm not fully back to writing this but i will soon, and that's a promise.
You all have been so supportive I feel like ya'll deserve a happy ending. I'll write this again and end this happily alright? But ya'll would have to wait a little more and bear with me TT  
Lastly, whosoever is still reading this, I'm so thankful for the love you've given to this fanfic and I promise i will give you all the happy ending you deserve.