Always Been You | Tom Holland

EIGHTEEN

Tom

I'm a nervous wreck the entire drive to Y/N's flat. I didn't want a car service for the shoot today, and I'm regretting that decision now that I need to focus on driving and my anxiety is making that quite impossible. I'm not nervous to see Y/N. I'm actually quite excited for her to join me today. I'm more nervous about the fact that not even 24 hours ago, I was telling people on national television that we weren't dating, and now I'm bringing her with me to photoshoots and taking her to dinner. Well, I guess I never said we weren't dating, I just said we were friends. Which is true. Kind of.

I arrive at Y/N's building and text her to let her know I'm outside.

Tom

Here, darling.

If we weren't already running late, I would have gone up to her flat to get her. This will have to do. I'll be more gentlemanly when I pick her up for dinner.

Y/N

Coming!

I wish I made myself some calming tea. I also wish it wasn't wildly unprofessional to smoke a blunt before a photo shoot.

I see Y/N appear through her building's front door with two mugs in her hands. She beams at me. She's wearing loose jeans and a cropped blue and gray patterned sweater. The sweater only gives a slight peek at her midriff. A shame, really. I jump out of the car to open her door since her hands are full. 

And because I'm chivalrous!

"Thank you," she smiles and sits in the passenger seat, placing a mug on the center console. I close her door and walk around to my door, sitting in my seat and buckling my seatbelt.

"What's this?" I gesture to the mugs.

"Tea! I figured since you were running late, you didn't make yourself any." 

"Always thinking, aren't you? Thank you, love."

I shift gears and begin the journey to the photoshoot.

"So, do I just, hang out?" Y/N holds her phone in her hands, scrolling through her social media. She's pointed out every photo and article posted about us. It's cute.

"Your job is to support and look pretty," I wink. I feel her stiffen beside me. "So far, you're doing both perfectly."

"I must be pretty good at my job, then."

We pull into the lot and are directed to the valet at the front. I step out of the car and walk over to Y/N's door, opening it for her as she steps out. I feel the valet's eyes on us, but I don't care. I close the door and hand the valet driver my keys and some cash. I'm terrified of becoming one of those celebrities who are known for being assholes or bad tippers. I've actually always been a notorious over-tipper.

"Thanks, mate." I smile as he takes the keys from my hand. I feel Y/N hovering behind me.

"Of course, Mr. Holland." I still can't get used to people calling me anything but Tom. The valet driver nods and walks to my car, carefully driving it away.

"Mr. Holland?" Y/N appears beside me. "That's so weird."

"Yeah," I laugh. "Get used to it."

We walk through a series of doors and sign-in points to get to the set. Y/N is tense, I'm sure for the same reasons I am, and I can feel it. I wrap my hand in hers and give it a gentle squeeze. We walk into the room, hand in hand, and I feel her tense up even more. The room is busy. It usually is for a photoshoot like this. Obviously, she's not used to it. I pull her hand up to my chest and walk into the chaos.

"Good morning, everyone!" I shout. Heads turn, people smile, and most of the chaos continues. There are a few lingering stares, but I don't care. I'm happy Y/N is here. 

"Ah, Thomas!" The photographer, Sharif, approaches me with open arms. I've met him a few times before, and he's incredible. He loves calling me Thomas, even though I've assured him that Tom will do just fine. "So nice to see you again," he pulls me into a hug, forcing me to release my grip on Y/N's hand. "And who is this?" He shifts his gaze to Y/N. I feel her stiffen beside me and my hand finds hers once again.

"Sharif, this is Y/N. My–" fuck, how do I introduce her? She's not my girlfriend. She's not really my friend at this point... Luckily, Sharif doesn't let me finish my thought.

"Y/N! I've seen you all over Tom's Instagram. You are even more beautiful in person." He pulls her in for a hug.

"T-thank you," she stammers. I squeeze her hand to reassure her. I'm not sure that it helps, though. "I really appreciate that."

"Tom, I think they're ready for you in hair and makeup," I hear a voice next to me. I turn and see someone walking away, probably a very overworked AD, and just nod my head in reply.

I lead Y/N through more of the chaos and end up in the hair and makeup area. I've worked with all of these artists before, so it's no different than any other day on set. And let me tell you, Y/N is a natural. She's immediate friends with all of the people helping me prepare for the shoot. 

I can't stop looking at her through the mirror as I get plastered with makeup and hair gel. She is getting on so well with everyone. I knew she would -- I can see her nerves melting away the longer I'm in the chair. She even tells her new bestie, my hair stylist – Brain – how she prefers my hair to look. And he actually styles it that way. She has almost too much power here. I get the feeling that she's the favorite of the two of us, though I don't mind much.

Something about bringing Y/N into this realm of my life is very intimate. A different kind of intimate than I'd like to be currently, but this is a part of my life that she's never really seen before. She's experienced the paparazzi and some fan interactions, but nothing like this. I was kind of worried about what she'd think, but it seems that she's doing well for herself so far. It makes my whole heart soar.

We have a few minutes of waiting around until the wardrobe department is ready to dress me and start the shoot, so Y/N and I are left alone until I'm called to my next area.

"You fit in well here," I smile at her from my chair. "Brian loves you."

We're quiet for a moment.

"I'm glad you're here." I finally say.

"I'm glad I'm here, too," she smiles at me. I feel my whole body turn into jelly. "I like seeing this side of you. You're so professional."

"I try to be," I shrug. "You doing okay, my love?" Ah, my love. I should watch that. I don't want to scare her off, but I don't want to be unclear about how I feel. Granted, I think that ship sailed when I blurted out that I loved her yesterday. Fucking hell. Y/N looks at me in the mirror with a smile.

She smiles. "I'm doing fine."

"Tom, we're ready for you."

"That's my cue. Gotta start warming up my model face." I do my best version of a Tangled-style smolder in the mirror and wink at her. She smiles at me in the mirror, but I can see a tinge of fear on her face. I hope I haven't already fucked this up. "See you in a minute, darling." I turn to her and place my hand under her chin. She smiles and nods at me.

I want to kiss her. But I don't.

"Ah, now that Tom's leaving I can get all the dirt on him!" Brian shouts as I walk away. All I can do is shake my head. "Now, how is my favorite guy, Ben?"

"Still straight, and now dating her best friend!" I shout over my shoulder. I hear him groan and Y/N laugh. Man, I need to find that dude a boyfriend.