Always Been You | Tom Holland

NINE

Y/N

"What do you mean 'is there a dress code'?" I turn to Jane, half-dressed, with pure confusion on my face. "J, it's my graduation party, not the Met Gala," I laugh. "Wear whatever you want."

"Sometimes these parties are fancy!" She pulls her dress over her head and examines herself in my mirror. "This okay?" I turn my head to look at her as I'm slipping my shoes on. I have to hold back asking her why she is so worried about looking a certain way for this party. Could it have anything to do with my brother? I'd put my money on yes.

"You look great! Now let's go, my mum will have a fit if we're late."

We grab the supplies we've been tasked with bringing and climb into Jane's car to make the trip to my parent's house. Granted, I live pretty much around the corner from them, but sometimes the trip feels longer. We park in their driveway and start the many trips it will take to get all of the supplies in.

"Mum, where do you want these?" I search the house for my mum, but she's nowhere to be found. Typical. I place the bags on the counter and start sorting through everything.

"She said to leave everything here and she'll sort it out," Tom's voice makes me jump. "Sorry. Didn't mean to startle you."

"Just lost in my own world. Sounds like she's in party mode." I lean against the counter and look out into the backyard where Jane and Ben are already setting up the bar – and testing it. I look across the garden, soon to be filled with people, and sigh.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Tom stands across from me, arms crossed, and smiles. Something about him asking me that makes me feel warm. I'm immediately brought back to our childhood. When things were easier. God. So much easier.

"I'm just already exhausted. And, if I'm honest, I'm anxious about Jack possibly showing up." I look back at Tom, who is now frowning. Am I imagining the clenching of his jaw at the sound of Jack's name?

"We won't let him ruin the day." Tom nods toward bartenders Ben and Jane. They're clearly arguing about something bar-related, but I can see from Ben's dopey smirk that he's loving every minute of spending time with Jane. "All you should worry about is celebrating your incredible accomplishment." I look down at my feet and smile. "What can I do to help?" He steps toward me and places his hand on my arm. His skin is so warm. He rubs his thumb across my skin, sending little tingles through my arm. I watch his thumb move back and forth on my skin as it feels like he's using my arm for kindling to start a fire. "Y/N? What's wrong?" Huh? Oh.

"Oh," I look at him and sigh. "N-nothing. Uh, I need to ask Jane something." I turn and walk toward the garden, leaving Tom in the kitchen alone. My arm continues to burn as I walk -- nearly run -- away from Tom and my kitchen. 

"Okay?" I hear him shout as I step onto the grass. We've been having these weird moments more and more lately, and if I'm honest, they freak me out. I almost want our relationship to go back to the way it was before. Being as cordial as possible while bursting with annoyance at the other's presence.

I busy myself with setting up the garden with Jane, while Ben and Tom help my mum inside. She is presumably making them hang up decorations and fix things around the house. My dad is on another beer run with one of the younger Holland brothers because apparently, my mum insists we didn't buy enough booze. Though, looking at our spread, that seems impossible.

Every time I hear a new voice enter my house or the garden, my heart skips. Jack hasn't spoken to me since we broke up, and he stopped sharing his location with me days ago, obviously. I truly have no idea if he was serious about showing up today, but even if he wasn't, he successfully got into my head one last time. I need to just take a breath and try to relax.