Always Been You | Tom Holland

FOURTEEN

Tom

"There you are!" Z throws an arm around me and guides me to the garden. "What happened to you?" I look around to see who is in earshot before responding.

"Uh, I was getting a jacket for Y/N," I whisper. I nod toward Y/N walking a few feet ahead of us, wearing my jacket. "And we, uh, kinda made out." Her eyes widen as she absorbs the information I just gave to her.

"I told you! You so love her," she whisper-shouts.

"I don't know, Z, she kind of rushed out of my room when we were done. I'm just all around still frustrated with her." I watch as Y/N dances with Jane, my jacket draped over her shoulders. My stomach does a flip and I kick myself internally for it. "She never fails to leave me feeling angry."

"Just try to enjoy the rest of your party. Jane was so sweet to set this all up."

"You're right. Let's get a drink."

–

I'm just angry now. I've spent all night thinking about my interactions with Y/N and I'm angry. I feel kind of used, honestly. I'm so confused about everything. I have so many different feelings about Y/N currently. I want to grab her and kiss her, but I also want to scold her for everything going on. Though, the former is currently winning out as I watch her dance with Ben. They've got one arm around each other's waists and they're holding their free hands together, spinning in circles. The song that's playing isn't a slow song, but they're dancing around like that anyway. They're ridiculous. 

The sun is going down and the party is as strong as ever. I sip on my champagne and watch everyone dance and laugh with each other. I am having fun, I swear. More fun than I thought I would. Aside from the very confusing feelings running through my head, I'm actually having a really good time.

"Come dance with us," I'm snapped out of my stream of consciousness by a voice behind me. I look up to see Y/N's smiling face standing above me. "You can't sit alone at your own birthday party. Come dance with us." She reaches out her hand and smiles at me. It's her, I know we just made out in your room, but I'm actively ignoring that smile.

"Alright, I'm coming, I'm coming," I laugh, grabbing Y/N's hand as she drags me to the dance floor.

Now, I know I'm like, a classically trained dancer, but regular dancing is not my strong suit. I think too much about what my limbs are doing and how poised I look. I guess that's the downside of being a classically trained dancer. It's still fun dancing with my friends. I work up more of a sweat dancing than I do in the gym training for Spider-Man. I'm so hot, I need to take my suit jacket off and throw it inside so I can get some relief from the heat throughout my body.

"Alright birthday boy, it's time for a birthday shot." Ben throws his arm around me and grins.

"You know my birthday isn't for a few more days, right?" I chuckle, but Ben is already leading me to the bar.

"Then I guess we'll have to take a shot then, too," he shakes my shoulders and grabs two shot glasses from the bar, where Jane has poured a shot for everyone. They really are made for each other. Ben gains the attention of the crowd and holds his shot glass in the air. "To Tom, one of the best guys I've had the pleasure of calling my best friend. You deserve nothing but the best. Happy birthday, mate. Love you." Again with the tears. Ben and I have been crying all night. I can't help myself when he gets going. The alcohol doesn't help, either.

"Love you guys," tears are in my eyes. I feel an arm around me and turn to see Y/N standing next to me. She winks at me and squeezes my shoulder. We all throw our heads back and let the liquor fall down our throats. That burn never gets easier.