Attraction, desire, and sinfully beautiful, Mika Santana is a devil with the face of an angel. Despite her tragic past, she's never given up her ruthless pursuits for success and vengeance which leaves little to no room for matters of the heart. But...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I'm lying in the abyss, strolling along the sky on my pillow made of fluffy clouds. Mateo dropped a weight of information on my foot and left me with my swarming thoughts. It's like I'm not even here, wandering through my life in the third person. My mind has taken the parked shift and switched to drive, bolting past every option until they're ingrained in my eyes.
How am I supposed to enjoy my possible last moments with Asiel when I'm fighting the warriors in my mind? I always thought I was strong — that I could prevail over anything, but the pressure is smothering me. How am I supposed to make a decision that transforms not only my life but Asiel's? How is that fucking fair? It's fucking mind-boggling, and I can't even ask the person I trust the most.
I'll be lying if I said that option three was tempting.
The demonic voices whisper in my ears, their burning breath scraping the ends of my ears. To fuck everything! You deserve happiness, too. Your happy ending is only a blink away. I thought I had changed, but the same old Mika resides inside me. It's just I want to keep him for myself. He brought me onto this rollercoaster, and now I never want to get off. He strapped me in for life.
Just like the demonic voices in the background were the sweet, soothing murmurs of an angel. It's nearly impossible to hear over the dark, grim tones of the darkness harboring in my soul. My ear tingles as they pose tremendous questions. Don't you love Asiel? You owe him the truth. He deserves to make the decision himself.
Regardless, none of the options were good. I didn't want to visualize what would happen if I chose to expose Mateo-- I'll be going down with the ship. The thought slices through my heart, piercing the bloody organ and leaving a path of devastation in its wake. I'm not sure I can carry around the guilt.
Why couldn't we hide from the world together until everything blew over?
As absurd as it sounds, I would prefer Mateo to penalize me by having to kill dozens of people. It's terrifying, isn't it? Mateo could ask me to kill anyone, no matter how many, instead of giving up Asiel. Even though I'll be trekking in hell through the corpses of my victims, paying for my sins. It wouldn't matter because I would save the only man I ever loved.
But hurting him, no, killing him-- just the thought of betraying Asiel causes my stomach to twist into knots of guilt. If Mateo gave me these choices months ago, when I treated Asiel like utter shit, then I would've picked the worst option.
"Princesa, do you have the scrunchie?" Asiel asks, arching his neck, giving me a peek at his sweet face. I nod, handing the black scrunchie on my wrist, and sigh. "Is everything okay? You have been out of it for the past few days. You know I'm not upset, right?"
"Mmm," I reply, nibbling on my lip.
"Princesa, can I be honest, too?" The bristles from the brush tickle my hair as he sways away every knot. "Knowing that you're with other guys does hurt... but I'm not really one to tell you what to do with your body. It's your body, not mine, and I can't claim any rights to it. I was ecstatic about you leaving Diablo's Paraiso, and it hurt when you changed your mind, but I get it. It's not the work that's keeping you there. It's the familia you created."
