Let's Find Forever | Herophine Fic

Can't Go Wrong With Tradition

HERO

Telling everyone that me and Jo are expecting a baby couldn't have gone any better. Firstly, telling Jo's family with such a distance between us, did worry me. It was so difficult to read their expressions after Mila stepped in for Jo and delivered the news. The way she did it was so soft and caring, she knew Jo was struggling. But when Jo told them just how happy we all are, the happiness seemed to travel south of the equator and right down to them in Perth. Their smiles and the excitement radiated off all of Jo's family right through the screen of my MacBook.

Then came telling my family. And although I put a brave face on for Jo and continued to tell her that everything would be fine and to keep calm, in reality, I was stating those words not only to her, but to myself too. Getting Jo pregnant wasn't on my agenda when I returned to her that night last year. Far from it in fact. I returned to tell her I loved her and that both me and Mila can't be without her. But our lovemaking led to something more for all of us.

The feelings I felt driving to south London to see my parents were exactly what I felt when Sara and I told them we were expecting Mila. I'll admit open heartedly that my babies are happy accidents, both times I've got their mother's pregnant we weren't even trying but seemingly, both my babies are meant to be. Sara and I said from the start we wouldn't change anything about conceiving Mila while we were young just as Jo and I wouldn't change anything about conceiving this baby.

Needless to say, my family quickly joined us in basking in the glow of Jo's pregnancy news. I couldn't wait until after our roast, I wouldn't have been able to stomach anything over the course of the meal, so I thought it best to just tell them. Like ripping a plaster off. It was like a blast from the past for me, seeing their faces drop and the silence linger threw me back to when they found out Mila was on her way. But similarly again, they were incredibly happy for us. Who wouldn't be happy at a new baby in the family? And Mercy's happiness increased tenfold when Jo and I agreed to letting her throw us a gender reveal party.

I know a part of their happiness - just as it is mine - is all because they thought this wouldn't happen again. They thought, just as I did, I'd be alone and it'd be me and Mila against the world. I did see that as my life... until Jo's letter arrived. None of this would be possible without that and without her. There aren't enough words in the dictionary to ever describe how grateful I am to her.

***

Jo's now officially entered into her second trimester which is absolute madness. Last time around, this is where it really hit me that a baby, a little life, was on its way to change mine all for the better. And of course, cause chaos when they saw fit. She's already started to show. It's small, but as Jo's stomach is completely flat anyway, the lower part of her belly is very slightly rounded. When it's completely rounded for everyone to see, I know that's when it'll feel extra real that there's going to be four of us by the end of the year. Her bump, even now, is evidence that the baby is there, they're growing and are healthy. All tucked away in Jo's belly.

Both Mila and Jo think that the baby's a boy. But for some reason, exactly like last time I can't help but think we have a daughter on the way. Another little girl to add to my tribe, if you like. The few times I've allowed myself to think about life after the baby's born, I can't help but see a mini Jo running around, her blonde hair similar to that of her sister's and piercing blue eyes staring into the distance. I sometimes look at Mila and somehow see Jo in her too. Of course, she's continually picking up on Jo's Australian drawl but even though she's not hers biologically, she's hers in every other way.

The thought of having a son - a little boy - fucking terrifies me. I've been through the newborn, terrible two toddler and every other phase in between up to now with a little girl. I'd have no clue what to do with a little boy, it would be unchartered territory for all of us. Granted, if we did go on to have a girl, no two babies are the same but I feel like I'd have an advantage somehow after getting Mila to five years old successfully, primarily on my own.