Harper

Chapter Seventeen: Utah calling

"Harper... your dads on the phone" my mama called from the kitchen. I flicked the TV off and walked slowly to the kitchen.

"I've told her Ben but she didn't want to and now it's too late, she can't fly she's too far gone. If that's the case you will have to come here wont you" I could hear half of the conversation and I knew he had wanted me home again, he called every week desperate for me to return home and return to church. Apparently they were happy for me to return, the family, church and dad, they could be there to support me and dad wanted me back where he could see me, but mama wasn't in Utah, Willa wasn't, the Oregon family wasn't and neither was Teddy, life for me wasn't there anymore. I did miss things about it, it had been my entire life. I enjoyed church for the most part and although I wasn't your typical member, I still felt like I missed it and belonged in some part to it.

I reach out my hand and mama is surprised, up until now I haven't spoken with him, but my rage has subsided and I'm calm. I'm nesting, and getting ready for my baby bird and I didn't have room for hate in my life or for anything that made me feel unsettled. I was ready to be at peace and to welcome Wren into the arms of a zen mama.

"You sure" she asks.

I nod and smile weakly "it's okay mama" I say and she kisses my head and leaves me to it.

"Dad" I answer quietly.

He takes a long breath "oh my baby I've missed your voice"

I can hear it in his, that he is sincere, and I feel terrible, that I've basically ghosted him. "I just want to say straight away that I'm mortified about how I acted when you told me about the baby. Things happen in life and it's not a reflection of your character Harper. I heard he wasn't a nice boy... and I'm sorry you had to deal with a person like that. Just to be clear I would have never made you marry him or anyone for that matter. I was just panicked and spiralling"

There's a moment I feel like his voice cracks, he  is unusually emotional for my dad.

"Harper I hope you forgive me... and what I said about your Mama, that was horrible...Allie will be a wonderful grandmother. I'm so excited for this grand baby, our first, and your grandparents here are delighted to have another great grandchild too. Mom wants to come up and visit when baby is here so I will bring her with me if that's okay, to visit"

I feel a tear roll down my cheek and capture it in my hand wiping it away "of course dad.. I've missed you all" I confess "so much"

He tears up "Harper you have no idea. I feel like I lost my right arm... kid you are my world you know that right... your old dad needs you"

"I know" I whisper through tears, and I sit at the breakfast bar and run my hand over my bump.

"I'm coming up this week" he announces.

I am wide eyed "what" I ask excitedly "really"

I can hear the smile in his voice "really my baby. I want to help you set up her nursery if that is something you don't mind. I would love to be the one to build my granddaughters crib"

I cry again, easily done with the hormones "I would really really like that dad" I confess.

"I hear you have been a good friend to Ethan" he adds changing the subject.

I sit back a little, confused. "Ethan" I ask.

"Ethan, that good looking kid working with your mama" he says laughing.

The frown fixed upon my brow is deep "dad I know who he is, I work with him too, but how do you know him?"

"He's Joshua and Lillian's son" he informs me as if I should know that.