𝐈'𝐝 𝐁𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐭 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐜𝐞

𝑠 𝑒 𝑣 𝑒 𝑛 𝑡 𝑦 𝑓 𝑖 𝑣 𝑒

Cassandra's pov
TW: mentions of physical assault, self harm..
((Same day as last chapter.. March 31st 2022 - later on in the day))
A/n: long ass intermission 🤧..

...

Although I knew of it, I seriously didn't believe there was a such thing as underreacting.

The idea of you having an under reaction to some type of problem and the people around just sitting up there and eyeing you weird 'cause you've yet to to react with a sense of enthusiasm, was always a bit odd to me. I'd understand why the underreaction would be such a big thing though.

Hailey definitely thinks I'm underreacting right now.

She's pacing back and forth in my room, practically tugging at the roots of hair as she mumbles words under her breath, while I sit crisscrossed on my bed finishing up this essay that's due in a couple hours.

"Baby take a seat," I mutter inattentively without looking up from my laptop.

Hailey let out a shaky breath and stops her pacing, only to run her face over her hands rather roughly. "I.. can't and you know that,"

"Why?"

"Because you didn't tell me who did that stupid ass shit to your car, the fuck you mean why?!" She screams finally, letting her hands fly in the air and smack her legs in frustration. Chest heaving up and down as if she's just run a marathon.

I look up from my laptop and look at her with sad eyes and then it's like a wave of sadness has washed over her with one look.

Hailey sighs, threading her ring covered fingers through her hair. "I-I didn't mean to scream at you.. okay? You.. you know that I'm upset,"

"Just because you're upset, doesn't mean you have to scream at me"

"Don't make this into," She pauses for a moment. ".. what ever you're about to make it into."

"I wouldn't have to if you would just calm down." I say.

Then she's silent as she slips off her jacket, and I go back to finishing my essay. I didn't even want her to come over 'cause I knew things were gonna go like this.

At the beginning of the day she was all like, 'e hana wau i kekahi mea inà makemake 'oe - and - tell me why you're upset', and reluctantly I told her why I was upset, and she exploded, which made me feel like I shouldn't have said anything.

I shouldn't always feel like I shouldn't speak out when something bad happens, but I still do and I feel like that's where all my problems stem from;

Conflict or more of the fact that I try to avoid it most of the time, is the root of my problems. I feel like that's why things keep going wrong.

The way I just think if I don't speak on a particular situation I didn't enjoy, it will just appear as if that said situation didn't happen. Not the best way to cope, but it's my way.

It's not like you can avoid conflict though, that's where I keep going wrong.

To just sit up here, thinking I can move around as I please and never have a problem.

Thinking that once I moved outta my parents house and stopped working myself to death, I'd finally find some peace. Some type of tranquility, even if it was only for a second.