The Heroin Diaries.

Don't Fight, Eat Nandos.

"Niall, can you Please just stop. Please. I am so tired of hearing about how you think I should live my life. You stay out, fucking whores, you have no job, no goddamn place to stay, and no fucking car. I am at the rehab center, being there for someone Who has no one. I am not a little girl. Maybe I do always try to fix the broken, but at least I don't break them even more. You're an asshole and I really don't want to see you or hear your voice for a while." Niall and I were nose to nose, he pushed me too far this time. I snapped. "You're a bitch. You're a good person, but you are a full blown bitch. The world is a crazy place Styles, you can't expect anyone to do for you like you do for them. You are too pure for this world. I am just trying to save you from it." He replied with tears threatening to pour over the brim of his bloodshot baby blues. "I don't need you to fucking save me Ni. I am a big girl. What I do is no concern of yours. Leave me alone." We stood staring at each other for a few awkward minutes before he walked away. I sighed, and laid my head on the kitchen counter.

Louis has kicked the withdrawals, now he is just trying to kick the habit. I've spent countless hours, and countless dollars to keep him on the right track. I'm behind four months of rent and I don't even care. I just want him to make it through this, because he is worth it. I've been there, everyday. I've held his hand, I've wiped his tears, wiped sweat from his forehead. For the past four months.

I never expected to lose my brother over this. I know his intentions are good, but he just goes way too far. I can't stand fighting with him. Honestly it kills me. He is my best friend. Louis said he wanted me to rest today, and that he wanted to be alone today. Inside I am beyond grateful. I need a break. Between work, fighting with Ni, and spending my free time with Louis, I am mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted. I raise my head from the counter and look at the fridge. Ive dropped 33 pounds in four months, and I haven't even tried.

I hear the sound of the Derby through the walls. My stomach growls, and I am pretty positive I just heard Niall's making whale mating calls. I walk to the living room, and poke my head around the doorway. "Nandos?" That was all it took for him to get up and run upstairs to get dressed. He was ready in about forty seconds flat, and out the door we went.

I made him drive so I could relax. I couldn't help but smile at his excitement as he pulled into the parking lot. It was close to deserted, which was even better. I didn't feel like waiting forever on a seat. We were seated, and ordered our drinks. As we waited I felt the need to apologize. "Ni, I am sorry. Of all people I shouldn't have snapped at you, you didn't deserve that at all. You do nothing but support me, even though you don't like it, and speak your opinion about it, you still support me. I know you don't like him, and that is okay, because one day, you will." He looked up at me and smiled. "Don't worry about it. I started it, I knew you would flip, but I pushed your buttons anyway. I should be apologizing." He replied smiling, as he eyed the waitress walking over with our drinks.

She took our order, and left us to wait again. Niall and I made small talk until our food came. My phone rang in my pocket, and Niall gave me the death glare. "It'll just be a second, I promise." I said as I exited the table and walked towards the door. "Hello?" I said weary of the unknown number. "Ello lovely" the raspy voice gave me goosebumps. "Louis, are you okay? You never call me." "I am fine love, I know I said I wanted to be alone, but I really could use your smiling face today." "Alright, I'll be there later. I am out with Niall, at the moment. So you want anything from Nandos?" "Yes Please. Just bring me what you had." "Will do. So I'll see you later, Yeah." "Yeah, see you soon love" I ended the call and walked back in and navigated my way back to our table. I sat down to a plate of food. "Why are you smiling so big?" "Me, I'm not smiling big" I say as I point to myself. "Styles. You are smiling like a crazy mofo. Who was on the phone?" I smiled and looked down at my lap, I could feel the deep rose color creeping across my cheeks. I looked up at him and smiled an even bigger smile. "Louis"