Ambivalence - yoonseok

36- c a r e g i v e r

Unedited

Hoseok picks Yoongi up after assessing the situation, realizing that he's having a panic attack. He rushes towards the bathroom and places him on the sink. Yoongi wails pathetically while staring at his hands now smeared with blood. Hoseok asesses the situation and grabs some gauze from under the bathroom cabinet.

"Tilt your head back, sweetheart." He hurriedly instructs, extending his hands to assist the hybrid but Yoongi jumps in fright before crying harder.

"Baby, you have to let me help you." He says as calmly as he can, watching the small hybrid shake like a leaf. Blood runs down his lips and drips off his chin and onto his shirt and lap. Hoseok wonders if anything is broken due to how much he's bleeding.

The caregiver tries to tilt Yoongi's head again, this time the hybrid lets him. He was crying out, wanting to be comforted. He didn't have a mother or father to come and give him affection, he didn't have a caregiver that would drop everything to focus on him, and that thought made him feel smaller mentally. He doesn't want to only always remember the bad things but bad memories outweigh the good ones in his head and this confuses him.

The feeling is much similar to the one he felt when he had fallen asleep with Hoseok the first time. The only difference was that instead of the calmness he had felt, it was a mixture of sadness and anxiety. The light feeling is still there, but now it feels heavier. It feels unsettling as he watches Hoseok wipe down his hands with a warm damp cloth, he can't seem to make out any words. Nothing to say and nothing to hear.

"Yoongi? Baby, can you say something, please?" Hoseok gathers his attention. He blinks down at him, feeling scared. What if he hits me? He thinks. Yet Hoseok folds a peice of gauze and slowly places it into his hand. He continues crying because he's confused. Now he's hurt and scared and confused and he just wants to sleep. Maybe he wants a pacifier as well.

"Put this in your nose, it'll stop the bleeding, okay?"

"H-hurts..." Yoongi whines, sniffling yet no matter what, he still bleeds.

Hoseok's hands grib at Yoongi's upoer arms, eyes wide with concern. "I know bub, I know it hurts but we have to stop the bleeding." Yoongi glances down at the gauze in his hand before placing it into a nostril, the one that was bleeding. The other one only bled a little bit. He winces in pain and cups his nose again, sobbing. He's very emotional for some reason.

"There you go, good job." The caregiver smiles as best as he can though it's clear he's startled from he situation as well. He uses the wet towel to gently wipes the blood from Yoongi's chin. The hybrid moves back from him, afraid.

"D-don't hurt m-me, please..." he cries, curling in on himself.

"I'm not going to hurt you, I'm just cleaning you up."

"B-but you did h-hurt me!" He whimpers, ducking his head so that Hoseok can't touch his face anymore.

Hoseok seems conflicted. It was a genuine accident yet in Yoongi's mind it was on purpose. He doesn't know how to make him understand that, though. "Baby, I promise it was an accident. I would never hurt you on purpose-"

The hybrid's face contorts into an emotion akin to anger. "Y-you ignored me all week! You said you w-would read me a s-story but you read one to Jimin i-instead!"

Yoongi isn't angry. He isn't. He's just hurt. And that was a bit of an exaggeration since Jimin's only been here for three days but still. He felt really upset and trying to convince himself that he wasn't jealous was just a waste of energy. Hoseok deserves to know that he's angry with him. He wants him to feel bad.