roulette;; k.v. (rewriting↻)

CHAPTER 32

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10 years prior

Jeongguk never knew how to feel excited upon seeing new things, like the kids of his age usually did. Even when he first stepped inside his new school for his higher studies as a freshman, he just simply went up to the Principal's office, with his bodyguard by him, clad in a typical black suit and an ear-piece attached to his ear. He just bowed after the Principal handed him his routine, as he had joined mid-session. 

The reason was that in his earlier school, he had been awfully silent since his eighth grade, after his mother's death and his father was very much concerned about it. So, besides appointing psychiatrists and clinical psychologists to give him therapies and medicines, he decided to shift him to another school. New people, new environment; Jaebeom thought it would be better.

He did not want to disappoint his father anymore by being distant or ignorant, so Jeongguk forced himself to get going each day. He focused more on his studies and tried to converse with people, but only his room knew the secrets the boy hid from everyone.

He would not say he did not have friends. Hoseok and Lisa were constantly there for him, but only till a certain extent, beyond which Jaebeom did not allow them.

His father had forbidden him to pursue photography, when he had once asked him and he could not deny. He had just nodded his head, accepting his father's command wordlessly. But, his hands itched to hold his camera sometimes, that his mother had gifted him on his thirteenth birthday, with all the love she had. So, he sometimes sneaked out of his house, while returning from school just to capture the beauty of nature that fascinated him.

But, that stopped, once his father caught him with the camera in his school bag. He was sent to school with a bodyguard, who would drive him to school and then back again to the mansion. That simply made his life more monotonous than it already was. 

So, after getting his schedule he was then again walked back outside, after his guard spoke to the Principal about some trivial matters that his father had asked him to mention, on behalf of Jeongguk. Because he thought Jeongguk was still not good in conversing. He looked around the corridors to find the guys of his age, talking amongst themselves, with smiles and laughs. Some gave him curious glances, which made him shrink more into his black hoodie, as he quietly walked towards his locker and kept his bag. No one approached him all day, in any of the classes. 

He knew his day would start with this and end with just this. Loneliness. 

*

Everyday was a same shit for Jeongguk. Go to school, study hard and come back home to just study and study again. He would not believe if someone said that they could feel him. Because he was perhaps the only child to live a life like this; living with the taunts of his siblings and balancing himself on the fingertips of his father. He was just so done.

He could not help himself. He could not help it, when his hands touched his camera again, when he was a sophomore. He had free classes on the last period of every Friday and on one of those Fridays he had encouraged himself do it. The guard had seen him, but him empathized the boy and did not complain, letting him be till the last bell of the school rang. Jeongguk was really grateful of the guard for helping him do this every Friday. He felt so contented. 

Just like that, one day he was standing behind his school campus. People were usually so busy that they did not notice the beautiful natural maple and cherry blossom trees. But Jeongguk could not just spend his time here. He loved it. There were beautiful birds and every Friday he could get something new for his beloved DSLR.

He hummed a soft tune to himself, while fixing his lens and focusing it on the little robin that rested itself on a branch, looking around curiously with its button-like eyes. Suddenly he heard some crunching of the dry leaves. He looked around carefully, slightly cautious because he was alone. He followed the sound, as quietly as possible until he reached the other side of the orchard and peaked out of the bushes to look at the scene that held him captive immediately.