Shy

Kit

I shake away the thought quickly, knowing it's not good to dwell. If she is downstairs, then it is both exhilarating and terrifying to know that she is so close. If she isn't, then I'll be simultaneously relieved and disappointed. There's no winning in this situation.

I close my eyes and focus on the tune instead.

I sit and play for a long time, not acknowledging the setting sun or the hunger that pangs through my stomach. A soft knock on my door interrupts my playing and I stop, a stab of fear coursing through me before I hear Kia's voice.

"Kit, do you want some pizza?" She asks and I realise that I really do.

I open the door and see her standing with a box. She grins and opens it up to reveal half a pizza with every veggie topping you could dream of, with the exception of sweetcorn. Horrible stuff to put on pizza.

"You ordered veggie?" I ask, my voice tainted with surprise as I take the box from her gratefully.

She laughs, nodding her head.

"Clara's a vegetarian too, so it worked out well." She says with a shrug. I swallow harshly, looking down as I grip the pizza tightly.

"Cool, well thank you." I say, eager to close the door.

"Kit, are you alright? You've been playing for an hour and a half, and it's nice, everyone thinks you're really talented but I know you. Are you okay?" She asks quietly, leaning against my door frame.

I nod quickly, not aware that they had heard me from downstairs.

"Just lost track of time, now get back down there and entertain them, you slacker." I quip, watching her grin as she reluctantly walks back downstairs.

I close my door hastily, trying to ignore the knowledge that my soulmate is currently beneath my feet and just so happens to also be a vegetarian. She really is the perfect girl.

I stuff a slice of pizza in my mouth, chewing quickly and replacing it with another bite. I grimace, hoping that tonight will not be a sleepless night full of thoughts of the girl downstairs. I sigh heavily.

That is exactly what this evening will be.

_

I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling in quiet despair. The girls had migrated up to Kia's room to sleep and the whispering had ceased long ago, yet I continue to lay perfectly still, my muscles aching and unable to relax.

I exhale impatiently and force myself to turn onto my side, bunching the covers up over my head. It's no use, my brain is buzzing and my body is wracked with anxiety. I glance over at the chair that I've propped up against the door, not nearly happy with the structural integrity of it.

I watch the chair, wondering if I put it there to keep the strangers out, or me inside. I shake my head, it doesn't matter. The fact still remains that I am unable to relax, and therefore unable to sleep.

I glance over to the piano longingly, wishing it didn't make such a racket so that I could play it anytime. My clock says it's well past 3am and I wonder if a softly played melody might go undetected.

No, it's not worth the risk.

My fingers wiggle in argument and I clutch the duvet tighter, frowning at my indecision.

One song. That's it, and then I'll get back into bed and go to sleep. I smile to myself, happy at the compromise I have reluctantly made.

My fingers press on the keys softly, following the music of the lullaby that lays abandoned on my music stand. This song is one I'm not fond of but this evening I change my mind. I had been playing it much too harshly, not comprehending it in the way it was meant to be understood.

Here in the darkness, so close to the girl my heart aches to be with, I understand it a little better. The light of the moon shines through a crack in my curtains, illuminating my room with a soft silvery glow and I allow myself to relax.

I can almost feel myself being lulled to sleep, dragged into a land of subconscious dreaming where perhaps things are different.

My fingers freeze, my eyes snapping open at the familiar sound of a creaking floorboard. Our hallway is full of them, only the masters of this house manage to walk in it undetected and this is clearly not one of them.

I slink back to my bed, my heart beating a little faster as I dive beneath the covers.

After a moment of silence, the dim light of the bathroom floods the hallway and I sigh, cursing myself internally. How stupid, of course my playing would wake someone up, I was asking for it.

I watch the door like a hawk, still unable to relax knowing that a stranger is just feet away from me. After what feels like an age, I'm just about ready to relax when a piece of paper is stuffed under my door.

I frown unhappily, hearing footsteps run back to the end of the hall and into Kia's room. I debate whether to look at it or not, although it's an exercise in futility. My curiosity gets the better of me and I pace over to my door to pick it up.

"I can't sleep, please keep playing."

I hum unhappily under my breath, fidgeting with the note in my fingers. The handwriting is small and neat, all the letters perfectly round unlike my spidery scrawl.

I sit at the piano and sigh, knowing who suffers just as I do this evening. It feels like my every nerve ending is on fire, working overtime to push me towards her and yet I slink away. I rest my head in my hands, feeling awful. I understand the reasons for my sleepless night and I accept the consequences, but she has no answers.

The only thing I am capable of doing for her right now is this, so I'll do it. Of course, I'll play. I put the note on my music stand, glancing one more time at her elegant script before focusing once more on the keys.

My fingers pluck up the most beautiful notes I have stored in my repertoire, hoping beyond hope that I can lull her to sleep. My evening is just beginning it seems, as I will continue to play until she wills me to stop. 

_

A/N I don't think I have uploaded on a single Wednesday since I said that I would. That really tells you something about me I suppose.

I hope my single reader out there is enjoying the story, let me know in the comments! :)