Finding Joy

Chapter 35

"I'm -I'm scared." Cara whispered.

"Baby, you're gonna do so so great okay?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "No I not. They-they gon laugh at me again." She said.

"Listen to me Cara. You want to read your book you do it okay? Mama has heard you read the book and you sound amazing. You're great." I told her.

"You sure?" She asked barely above a whisper.

"Sure? No." I said causing her to look even more scared. "Positive? Heck yes." I said.

She smiled and giggled at me. "I scared what if they no like it?" She asked.

"Listen Cara, I will be right here with you. If you miss a word I'll be right here don't worry." I said.

She nodded chanting to herself "no worry Cara. No worry."

Today, at school they have parents coming in to read books with the children for Dr.Seuss week. At school, Cara said she will call me mommy. I think it's from embarrassment of not having a 'mother' why she's doing it. Tonight Devin and I will have that talk with her.

"Next up. Cara and her mommy, Ms. Lauren." The teacher said super animated like.

"T-today." Cara said.

"Deep breaths baby girl remember?" I asked her as I sat her on my lap and rubbed her back soothingly.

"Today mommy and me gonna read story called Happy Birthday To You. It my favorite and- me and mommy read it sometimes at bed or different books." She said looking down at the book.

"Come on baby girl." I said as she opened the book.

"I wish we could do- what they do in." She stopped. "Mommy what's the word?" She asked nervously.

"Kactroo baby." I said and she nodded and continued.

"Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive..." She paused. "Who is you-er than you. Shout loud, "I am lucky to be what I am! Thank goodness I'm not just a clam or a ham Or a dusty old jar
of sour gooseberry jam!" She giggled laughing. "I am what I am! That's a great thing to be! If I say so
myself, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!" She finished and the whole class clapped.

"Yay happy birthday!" They yelled to her causing me to laugh and for her to shyly tuck herself into my shoulder.

"Why is that you're favorite book Cara?" Her teacher asked.

"Be-because my mommy brought it for me. She give it to me on my half birthday. I like it so much because I-I am different and I no talk the same and it say it is okay to be me because like my mommy say I special and I am who I am, what god want me to be." She said causing me to tear up.

Her teacher looked over at me and nodded. "That's a great book. One more time for Cara and her mommy." She said and the kids clapped loudly.

Once story time was finally over, I got a chance to talk to her teachers and they said she's been making good progress lately, and that I should continue to encourage her. I also warned then that I am a crazy parent and I'd handle a little kid if my baby comes home saying they were being mean to her again.

They understood and explained that the little boy tried to once be Cara's friend but Cara wouldn't speak to him so him being mean was his retaliation but little do they know my retaliation will involve that little boys ass being cut.

"I'm leaving now baby girl." I said as I bent down to Cara side.

Usually, when I dropped her off in the mornings she'd cry and make a fuss but all she did today was smiled and nod.