The Gray Dancer

13. FEVERISH

TAN RAYS SWEPT THROUGH HANNA'S BABY PINK CURTAINS. The world seemed different under the sun's gaze as the tan rays scattered within her room. The sun lit up Hanna's humble abode with its valor, shining over the skies in a fiery yellow. It ignited the world with its bright beams of yellow and orange.

Before Hanna's eyes sprang open, she knew it. Long before the sun rays warmed her skin, Hanna figured she was sick. As soon as her eyes fluttered open, a sudden chill washed over Hanna. The world before her became fuzzy. Almost at once, Hanna wanted to crawl back under her covers, closing her eyes to let sleep wash over her once more.

Hanna didn't feel up to it today.

Maybe running in the rain had not been the best idea.

But there was nothing she could do about it. A weekday meant she had to go to work, whether sick or not.

Hanna needed to push aside her splitting headache. She had to ignore the chills that swept through her to make it one piece. She couldn't skip work at all, meaning that Hanna had to do her best to function today, having no other choice but to disregard the light fever.

Hanna tossed the covers beside her, sluggishness filling her as she got up from the creaking bed. She closed her eyes, trying to breathe through her stuffy nose. If there was anything she hated the most, it was getting sick. Hanna couldn't stand the motion sickness that swept over her. As she moved through her apartment, the dizziness settled in. It seemed as if her apartment moved, squishing into a wide variety of colors as she moved.

Hanna wore her usual outfit. A pencil skirt and a light button-up. She never wore any accessories or much makeup, keeping within her boundaries. The last thing Hanna needed was to be judged for that as well.

"Don't you see her?" People would say, "Doesn't it look like she's trying too hard."

Hanna sighed, grabbing a different bag to fit most of her stuff inside. She didn't need to carry much, only needing to take the Macbook assigned to her. Hanna grabbed the backpack given to her by her manager to fit everything inside. One by one, she threw things into her bag, filling it up within a few minutes.

Hanna grabbed her apartment keys as she stepped out of her small, meager apartment, hardly being able to hold the key in her weak hands. It seemed she didn't have enough strength to grab it, but she pulled through. Hanna closed her door shut, sticking the lock inside the keyhole as she locked her apartment door.

The gusty breezes met almost at once. Hanna nearly froze due to her pencil skirt. It did not seem like the best outfit, but she never wore anything besides what she wore today. Even if the icy gusts blew, Hanna only had to endure them just like she dealt with life. She shivered as each breeze met her skin, only making her nausea worse. Hanna had more trouble seeing beyond the whirl of colors before her. Now, she almost had to squint to stay in touch with reality.

Hanna walked through the streets, watching as the streets swarmed with chatter, with life. All around her, it seemed that everyone enjoyed the reality given to them. They brimmed with joy, bubbling as they chatted with each and every one. On the other hand, Hanna appeared alone, clutching her handbag to her chest as she walked in what she considered her confident stride.

It may have made her feel confident, but it was anything but that to the outside eye. Anybody could tell Hanna's posture was not the best. She stooped as she walked, eyes fixed to the concrete flooring below her. Her heels were the only confident part about her. They clicked with the concrete, sending a tap into the air. It made her presence evident, the one Hanna wanted to hide.

The sun didn't help her at all. Paired with the icy winds, the sun did more harm than good. Hanna's world became fuzzier as she walked, and her lightheadedness increased. Hanna felt as if she floated on air. The world seemed like a puddle of jelly as she made her way through the streets, burning with a fever. Hanna didn't know why she had decided to go to work.