Killing Swans

Chapter 39 - Strange Goodbyes

I should have seen that something was up. That he wasn't taking running away together very seriously, because he had given up hope. He didn't think it would work and he couldn't take another disappointment and losing me. I couldn't blame him for thinking that way, I just blamed myself for not seeing it...for letting it get that far. They tried to comfort me, but we were all a mess as we were waiting for the surgery to finish...and I prayed that it would go well, even if there was little to no hope. I mean he had shot himself... I-in the head. But after hour eight, somebody else decided to show their worthless face. 

When I saw Josh slowly walking into the hall, where we all sat and waited, I lost it. "YOU! HOW DARE YOU SHOW YOUR FACE HERE!!" I yelled, jumping up and walking towards him and Josh didn't say anything, he just started at me. "He is getting surgery on his fucking head because of YOU! Because of what YOU DID TO HIM!!" I called, losing it and I was just about to hit him, when my friends held me back, because the security was already walking towards us and they didn't want me to get thrown out, they knew that I wanted to stay here and wait for Henry. 

"Sit down Milo, sit down, it's ok, he will leave!" Chloe said and together with Soo's help they brought me over to the bench, where they sat me down and Thomas helped as well, as we let Adrian deal with Josh. He glared at him, not saying a word and Josh didn't either, I think he was dead inside, he had no thoughts, no anything, but he looked like he wanted to cry. But I didn't care. He could be actually dead for all I cared. And letting Adrian handle this was probably the right thing to do. 

He looked him up and down, before he said, with an extra thick Russian accent, "You know, I have met a lot of people in my life, Crazy people. People who like to hurt other people. Even people who eat other people. And you would make one yummy steak for them. Go...Go before they might show up here." Josh didn't seem intimidated. He looked past Adrian and at me, before he said "Text me if he survives...that is all I ask." And then he turned around and left. I gripped my hair, crying in frustration and sorrow. He didn't deserve to know if Henry lived or died. It wasn't his place. 

Finally after ten hours the doctors came out to tell us, that they could remove the bullet and that thankfully it didn't destroy his brain. Apparently the impact of the gun was too much for Henry and he hadn't expected that, so the angle was off and it hit the back of the head, not the brain. It was still a lot of trauma on his brain, since there was bleeding and swelling and they didn't know if he would make it, but for now, this was all they could do. We just had to wait and see and that wasn't a very satisfying answer, but at least he didn't die...yet. 

Four days and Four nights Henry fought for his life. He was hooked up to a lot machines and the sight killed me. I didn't leave his side for the whole four days. I didn't go home, I stayed in the hospital, waiting for Henry to get better. If he ever would. The doctors said they didn't know if he would survive. And even if he did, the brain damage was not predictable. He could be braindead. And so I couldn't leave, I waited for him. Sometimes Soo, Thomas, Adrian and Chloe came by, one at a time, making sure I had some clothes to change, that I was sleeping, eating and drinking from time to time and that I was able to take short bathroom breaks when they would watch over Henry, holding his cold hand. 

After day one, one of the nurses helped me clean my hands from the blood, since I hadn't done so yet and she also checked up on me. She saw how much I loved Henry and so she gave me an extra comfortable chair, one that is actually just in the Pediatric part of the hospital, available for parents who wouldn't leave their child's side and I could lay on Henry's bed with my head, sleeping there from time to time. They did a bunch of tests and sometimes it looked like Henry wouldn't make it, those were the hardest times, when the machines would start beeping and doctors rushed into the room, trying to stabilize his state, but then he would recover a bit again. I became so used to the beeping sounds of the machines, that I basically didn't hear them anymore expect if they signaled something to be wrong.