Lucid Dreaming (Zayn Malik BOOK 2)

Chapter 46: The Love After The Loss

Loki's POV

The morning awoke me abruptly, to the cool isolation of the motel bed, in which Zoey was nowhere to be found. She must've left in the night, and took Zayn's Thunderbird with her. I broke the headboard in retaliation, naturally.

I knew Zoey would disappear, I saw it in her eyes when I reunited Evelyn in Lizard's Point, the fear, accompanied by the flight instinct settling in. I just hoped she wouldn't, as selfish as it is to want, I longed for her to stick around, to be a part of my life in a different way forever. But I know that Zoey is a survivor, she takes care of herself, and staying around me would have been the opposite of doing that.

Our last night together more than I deserved. No sex, not even many words, just her skin against mine, hands holding limbs, fingers tracing tattoos. The intimacy of touch, the words behind our unspoken goodbyes seeping into the atmosphere between us with body language.

Still, waking up to her gone was just as heartbreaking, even though I knew it was coming. She left me a letter on the dresser, Loki written in her annoyingly perfect handwriting on a white envelope. I'm not opening it, it'll be a goodbye, and I don't want a goodbye from Zoey. I'd rather hold onto the glimmer of hope that I'll see her again.

And I hold onto it the whole way home, even walking through the doors of Brandy house after a fucking long train journey. I'm greeted by Luna wearing a loose pink sundress in the foyer, who's holding Cyra in her arms, bouncing her. Her expression immediately changes as she sees me, dropping.

"Loki," She says softly, and I want to bury my face into her neck so she won't see my tears.

"Hey, sweetheart." I sigh.

"Did she?..."

"Yeah, she left. Took Zayn's car."

She looks away from me, letting out a jagged breath before turning back to me.

"Zayn is going to complain until the cows come home, he loves that car." She attempts to make a light joke, but I can hear the pain behind her voice. She and Zoey only just reunited.

"Baba Loki!" Cyra smiles at me, so I lean over and kiss her forehead.

"You OK?" Luna narrows her eyes.

I puff out a breath, sliding my hands into my back pockets "No."

"Do you need me to do anything?"

Yes, please hug me.

"No, I think I'm just going to go lie down, have a smoke."

She nods, placing Cyra on the floor "Sweetie, will you go ask daddy to sort your lunch out?"

Cyra plods on, up the stairs, faster than the average toddler, but that's occult children for you.

Luna steps forward, and the dress flows perfectly around her curves. My eyes drop to her belly, and I remember the positive pregnancy test that was not Zoey's.

"Congratulations, by the way." I gesture to her stomach "Baby number two."

"Yeah, let's hope this one doesn't get kidnapped." She laughs dryly "Zoey was certain it'll be another gi-"

She realises her mistakes, looking up at me with a horrified expression.

"It's OK, you don't have to pretend she doesn't exist for me." I shrug, even though I've had to swallow a lump in my throat "Do you think it'll be a girl?"

She doesn't respond, instead, she wraps her arms around my chest and tucks her head into it. I let my arms engulf her, internally rejoicing for the contact.