I thought you were okay

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Alex's P.O.V.

Once I got home, I got nervous and tense as soon as I saw Jennifer's car. She got back home before I did. I walked in and looked for Jen.

"Jennifer!!" I called her name.

"In here!!" She said from the laundry room.

I walked to her and closed the door. She was folding laundry and putting it into the basket.

"Baby, I need to tell you something, but we need to sit down first." I said nervously.

"Why? What happened?" Jennifer said as she finished folding the last few items.

"Just come and sit with me." I said and she nodded and walked with me into the bedroom. We went to go sit down on the bed and I grabbed her hand and sighed.

"So I went to go get food like after two and a half hours or maybe like three hours after you left... and I was in line and I saw Jess..." I said and Jennifer raised her eyebrows.

"Okay... What happened..?" She said softly as she asked.

"Well... She asked if we could talk and I said sure.. So we went to my car and ate our food there, we didn't eat on the patio because I didn't want paparazzi finding out and causing a big scene..." I said and gulped softly.

Jennifer was looking at me up and down and was scanning my body language. She knew I was nervous.

"Okay...? So...What happened..? You're not getting to the point fast enough." She said softly.

"Okay Okay.. We ate our food and after she tried to make me to suck on her breast." I blurted out.

"So you saw her nude... Alright.." Jennifer said calmly and got up and was about to walk out.

"Baby.. Yes, But I immediately stopped her and told her to get the fuck out of my car." I said and tried to prove my innocence.

"Okay.." Jennifer said calmly and shrugged softly.

"Baby, you're not mad..?" I said and started to break out into a sweat from being so nervous.

"I'm fine. I believe you.." Jennifer said and nodded softly then walked out of our room and went to the guest room and locked the door. She laid in bed and looked down.

"How the fuck is she so calm... Oh fuck.." I said softly to myself.

I started to panic more and went to the guest bedroom and tried to open the door but it was locked.

"Baby... Let me in please..." I begged her.

Jennifer went and opened the door and looked up at me. 

"Why are you not reacting..?" I asked worriedly, ready for her to yell at me.

"Because I expected it to happen at some point... I knew something like this would happen... and I've been hurt so much that this just doesn't affect me as much... Sure I am upset but what can I do about it..? It happened... It's okay if you enjoyed it.. I mean you did the first time." Jennifer said and shrugged.

"Jen...." I said and pulled her into a hug.

She didn't hug back. She just stood there motionless.

"Can you go... I just want to be alone.." She said to me.

"Okay.." I said softly and walked away. She closed the door and locked it then laid back in bed.

Jennifer's P.O.V.

I turned on the tv and stayed quiet as I was thinking. I appreciate his honesty but what irritates me is that he let her into his car... What did he expect would happen.. Of course, something was bound to happen...

I teared up as every memory from the first time he cheated popped up in my head. I remembered everything as if it happened yesterday...

All the negative memories I suppressed... Came back.. I immediately started to cry but softly so that no one would hear me. I curled into a ball and cuddled the pillow then cried myself to sleep.

Later that night, Alex and the kids ordered pizza and ate dinner without me. I woke up and went downstairs to see them finishing their meals.

I picked up Elias and kissed his head softly and held him close and Alex was holding Ivan in his arms.

"You okay mommy?" Emme asked.

"Yeah... Why?" I asked.

"Your eyes are red... and kind of puffy.." Max said softly.

"Oh... I was watching a sad movie and I was crying..." I said and glanced at Alex who was staring at me the whole time.

"Oh okay.." Emme said and nodded softly.

I sat down beside Emme and grabbed some pizza for myself and started to eat. The kids finished and excused themselves and took their plates to the kitchen. They put it in the sink then left and went to their rooms, leaving Alex and me in the dining room alone with Ivan and Elias...

I got up and picked up Ivan and Elias then took them to the living room.

Alex got up and followed me. He took Elias from me and held him close. I sat down on the couch and Alex sat beside me.

"Will you talk to me please...?" Alex asked softly.

"What is there to talk about...?" I said.

"You were crying and I wanted to know why.." He said softly.

I busted out laughing. "I'm fine." I said and got up and walked to the stairs. He continued to follow me.

I walked up the stairs and put Ivan in his crib. Alex put Elias in his crib while I turned on the tv and put a show for babies. The boys get really sleepy after eating. They snuggled into their blankets and watched tv.

I kissed their heads then went to my room. Alex continued to follow me.

I walked into the room and tried to close the door on him but he put his arm in the doorway and stopped me from closing the door. I walked away and he walked towards me and pulled me into his arms.

I could smell the scent of Jess... The first time it happened... I know I was just imagining it but when you are traumatized like I was.. It is easy to relive your past. I tried to block it out as much as I could but I couldn't.

As much as I wanted to keep my guard up and pretend I was fine... I broke and burst out into tears again. 

"How am I supposed to pretend that I am fine with you letting her in your car??? Are you stupid???" I blurted out and was punching his chest as I was crying. "I locked up those memories and never looked back until you unleashed those memories again... I thought everything was fine but it's not!" I added and continued crying.

"Jennifer, please... I-" Alex tried to speak but he had no words. He just looked at me upset and let me cry.

"Get out! Get out! GET OUT!" I yelled at him and he immediately left. I locked the door and continued to cry until I couldn't anymore.

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