Fate ✔

14

"Oh I understand!" He voiced out quite sadly.

I had to began explaining myself, that that wasn't what I mean. "Of course yeah you'll be worth my time as far my needs and wants won't appear less important to you than the expectations of this dominant culture surrounding us!" I tried explaining myself further.

He smiled at that, "I guess I appear too cultural for you."

That was just a casual statement he made, but I could detect a question mark from it.

"Honestly i'd say no. But though i'm quite new to this stuff, I feel like that's what mostly boys hold unto. Like giving much privilege to the Hausa culture more than anything else, regardless of them being hausa or not. And that's the environments effect I guess. So it's quite normal, but when it gets to a certain extreme, then i'll say it can't ever be normal; like the way the man wears too much of the pants here, having the most to say and holding too much unto the 'oh any decision i've made is final' mantra, I feel like that's quite extreme honestly. I feel like I can just tell you who I am and what I think, like if I don't it might appear quiet selfish and fraudulent of me."

"No it's okay honestly. I like you being yourself. Well, I don't think i'm all that. I think we'll be good if that's what you want. It's not that much!" He winked at me and smiled. "So what's your ideal type by the way?" He added.

"Looks like I should leave again?" Aisha said looking at both of us from one person to another.

We chuckled up at that. Saif asked her to seat please and I gently hold her hand making her seat down. I sipped on my drink from the straw before getting ready to answer him.

"Some one so nice and respectful. Someone I can trust and not have to worry about anything regarding him. And oh by respectful I mean respecting the differences between us. Some one who wouldn't attack my views even if they seem the craziest to him. But most importantly if I find someone like that and his relationship with Allah is quite faulty, then it will be back to square one."

Saif kept quite for a while.

"Then you ain't doing him anymore?" He asked.

"I ain't doing him anymore!" I reaffirmed and he smiled before nodding his head. "What about you?"

"I say you are my definition of a perfect ideal!" He simply said with a shrug. I bulged my eyes at him but he only shrugged back at me again.

I sighed, "okay what made me to be the definition of your ideal?"

"A lot of things honestly. The looks, the shyness, the whatever... the everything!" He just said before looking at me as if waiting for me to ask him something else. But I just forced out a smile and kept mum because honestly nothing he said makes sense to me. Seriously the whatever the everything?!

Finally he paid for our food, before walking us to our ride. He had his car packed away quite close to Aisha's. We thanked him and wished him a safe trip, as we've heard him talked about traveling, though we had no idea where he's heading to.

And then I heard him talked again, and his words made my heart somersault. I had no idea why though, or maybe I do.

"So Ilhan before I took off, i'll like to drop by...by God's will, that's if you don't mind. I mean to tell you bye and see you for the last time."

My eyes automatically locked up with Aisha's. That's it! I know he'll hate me when he sees my house. He's gonna say i've wasted his time if I came from that house, not that i'm not proud of my house, or want something better, not that i'm not grateful to Allah for my house. I'm actually really grateful to Allah for a roof over my head. But anyone that sees Saif would be insecure of many things about oneself. Infact he makes me feel super insecure of even my looks, literally everything about me. But then the house thing is a whole different story. I'm sure just his wristwatch will afford my house and every single thing my whole clan ever got in our possession.

Then I watched as Aisha nodded gently at me.

Ya Allah I don't even want to give him the address.

"It's okay Ilhan. You can take your time if you're not actually ready for this." He said gesturing to the space between us, referring to the little thing we got, seeing i've took forever and was still not giving him my address.

I gulped down a saliva before nodding my head a little, "it's...rijiyan lemo number 15, kusa da Malam Tanimu me tsire and 'dan Asabe baduku." Just like that I found myself telling Saif of my address.

"Thanks a lot." I heard him say.

We exchanged greetings and salam before he said he would wait till we vanish before walking to his car.

We kept driving in silence. Morethan thrice from my sideview i've seen Aisha turning her head and taking few glances at me, but she wouldn't say a thing and would focus her eyes back on the road, and I didn't as well. We were just driving in silence. Utter silence!

I wasn't about to talk, because I was so nervous. I still couldn't believe all that happened. I kept thinking and rethinking whether i've made a good decision, because why would i agree to that at the first place. A guy part of the elite of society? A girl part of the low asocials of society? Why would I ever think the two will form a great match? In which history has this ever happened? Oh God I know i'm just deceiving myself! Plus i've given him my address, now I know he's gonna hates me.

"Stop thinking hard about it."

I heard Aisha finally said. That made me released a sigh i've been holding in for long.

"Aisha this is just...I don't even know what to say!"

"Then don't say a thing. Just let it be. Just lay low as you see it unfold before your eyes. No need to keep overthinking stuff. I mean we are all imperfect. It's not a new thing to see he's feeling all sort of insecurities you're having as well."

"That can't be!" I stated matter of fact.

"You bet!" She just said and concentrated on the drive.

"Aisha now he's gonna hate me right?"

She released a heavy sigh, followed by face palming herself, as she ended up holding the steering wheel of her car with one hand and gesturing at me with the other, "insecurity is the enemy of relationship! You both are insecure. He's insecure because he likes you so intensely and is afraid you won't like him back, and he's super afraid of losing you, while you keep being insecure because you thought he's of high birth, and might hate the real you for that. But let me ask you this, you think he was happy telling us of things he's allergic to? If that's how you take it, you're wrong. That was insecurity speaking at high peak!