Pretend (Harry Styles) - Book 3

Chapter 25: A Proper Boxing Match

I lean down, testing the waters, but she turns her head to the side. She's not ready.

Instead I wrap my arms around her shoulders, pulling her into me. Her rounded stomach pressing into mine. She clutches onto the sides of my shirt. Not hugging me back but giving me something.

"Let's go to bed yeah?" I press a kiss to the top of her head before letting her go. I won't force this.

This is going to happen exactly how and when she wants it to.

I offer to sleep on the pull out couch but she calls me silly. Saying the king size bed is plenty big enough, but making a remark to keep my hands to myself. She says it with a hint of amusement but I know she means it.

I don't care. She's here. She's staying in my room with me. She's sleeping in my bed next to me. I couldn't be happier.

I do as she says, keeping my distance as we slide into bed. It's nearly impossible, not reaching for her. Pulling her into my chest. Holding her.

But I restrain myself. Barely.

I can feel her body heat as she tries to make herself comfortable. She can't sleep on her back or her stomach any longer, it's to uncomfortable. She has to have her leg thrown over a pillow. A little over two weeks and I feel like I've missed so much.

She settles with her back to me, facing the wall as I stare up at the ceiling. She's wearing my old hipsta tee. You couldn't slap the grin off my face when she walked out of the loo with it on. Snug on her belly but swallowing her everywhere else. She blushed when she realized, obviously not thinking when she'd packed it. Made me wonder if she wore one of my shirts to bed every night. Made me hope she did.

I can feel the tension between us, the air is thick with it. It's so unusual for us.. to be sharing a bed but not touching. To be this close, but feel so far away.

I hate it. But I only have myself to blame.

I can't fall asleep. I toss and turn, but my body refuses to give in. I'm so bloody excited about finding out what the sex of the baby is. I'm so fucking worried about us talking about everything.

Did she just come for the appointment? Cause she felt like she had to include me?

I know she missed me, but that doesn't mean she forgives me. The doesn't mean she'll stay.

I know she loves me, but that doesn't mean she wants to be with me.

I've almost driven myself mad with my thoughts when I'm startled by Ava quietly gasping.

I immediately sit up, moving over towards her. "You alright? Av.. what's wrong?"

She doesn't respond, instead bringing her hand back and grabbing mine. She pulls me towards her, pressing my palm against her belly.

I freeze, half leaning over her as she lays on her side holding my hand firmly against her stomach.

Then I feel it. A gentle kick... then another.

And another.

"That... that our baby?" I don't even recognize my own voice as I ask the question I already know the answer to.

"Yeah." Ava giggles. "Have never... It's never kicked before."

I laugh at Ava's tone. Proof she's just as chuffed as I am.

"It hasn't?"

"No."

I smile, "Waiting for daddy before it started to show off I reckon. Strong little thing isn't it?"

Ava laughs, still holding my hand against her as our baby has a proper boxing match in her belly.

We're still there, not moving an inch until it finally settles. Deciding to give it's mum a break and let her sleep. I can't describe how that makes me feel. Never have been so happy before. Never anywhere near it.

When Ava lets go of my hand I hesitate. I know I should probably return to my previous position, on the other side of the bed. But after sharing that, I feel so close to her. I don't want that to end.

So I don't let it.

Instead I lay down right behind her, my chest pressed against her back as I wrap my arm around her.

"If you don't want this.. just tell me." I say quietly.

I fully expect her to push me away.

But she doesn't.

She just rests her hand on her belly as she sighs. Contentedly.

I press my luck again as I place my hand over hers, us both now holding her rounded belly.

Her fingers slightly entwine with mine, letting me know she wants me right where I am.

Right where I belong.

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Double update! Gotta vote for that right!?!