Celestial Love (Anthony Rizzo)

.7. Forgotten

Celeste

The summer is the worst time for me because that's when football is on hold. James takes a extended break then in June he really gets into it. Although he is the devil himself during football season he is also not around as much and I have a little more freedom. But in the summer he's always around. He's always here and it's exhausting.

Finally for a few days he was going to go workout with some of his buddies in Indiana and he let me stay home. Let me off my leash a little. I don't know what I did to deserve some freedom for a little while but I greatly appreciate it.

So Anthony comes and picks me up before we decide to go out on his boat. He had been talking about it for the longest time and I have never been out on Lake Michigan before. The cameras won't reach out there so it was a win win situation. He gets us some sushi and wine and we get far enough out that the honking of the cars had faded away, but we were close enough that you can still see all the beauitful buildings.

"I can't believe how incredible this city is, and that I never got to see it like this" I sigh as I lean against the rail. I let the wind take my hair as I admire this beautiful city.

"This is my favorite place to be, out on the water looking over the buildings. I think how out of the billions of people who live on this earth, I'm lucky enough to call this place home" he says as he pours us some red and wine.

"How long have you been here" I wonder.

"Since 2012. Though I didn't always have a boat" he smirks.

"It's a good purchase" I admit.

He hands me a glass of wine and I take a long sip. Almost immediately I relax as I feel the drink go down my throat. "I haven't had red wine in so long" I sigh.

"Seriosuly" he asks.

"Red wine stains teeth, I can't have stained teeth in public. People won't think I'm beautiful" I say.

"Well then I guess I should probably keep you away from the blue dumdum's then huh" he jokes.

"I'm married to one" I mumble as he laughs at me.

"So you finally get away from him and the first thing you want to do is stain your teeth" he asks.

"No. The first thing I wanted to do was see you. Then whatever happened after that, happens" I smile.

He just nods before turning back out to the city. "So how have you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever" he claims.

"It's the same old same old. I go to sleep to dream and wake up in a nightmare. But what can you do" I shrug.

"Get on a boat I guess" he teases.

"I've always wanted to come out on a boat. I'm not a good swimmer but maybe that's why I wanted to come out here" I joke as his eyes get big. "I'm kidding. I know that if I end up over board for whatever reason you would do anything to save me" I accuse.

"Yes I would" he states proudly as I shake my head. "So when you were a kid, what did you think you would be doing in your life right now" he asks me. I had to actually think about this one because I all but gave up on those dreams. But they're still burning inside of me.

"I had such plans. I was gonna be interior designer. I watched all those home improvement shows growing up and I would rearrange my room weekly. I got to be creative and use my brain to do some cool stuff. Use only what I have to make something new. I even went to college for a designing degree but only got to go for two years before I got dragged away. But I still get to do some things around the house. I can't change too much or he will get mad but I like rearranging and painting and all that stuff. Having the power to create, having the creativity to build a world people dream of. I wish like hell I could still do that" I sigh.

"You can, you're never to old to finish up college" he tells me.

"I forgot I had dreams up until you asked me. Up until I met you I forgot about a lot of things I once thought I would never live without. And every day since you had been in my life I realized just how much mine sucks. You remind me of all the things I once loved about this world. All the things that used to keep me going that I have all but forgotten. You represent every thing I once stood for, and all of it that fell short.

Part of me hates that you remind me of these things. It makes living in reality that much harder. But whenever times get hard my mind always come back to you because you fit every part of my dreams, just not my reality" I tell him.

He lets out a harsh sigh as he sets his wine down. He looks down as the water crashes against his boat. "I don't mean you any trouble" he tells me.

"I know Anthony. I don't think for either of us meant for any of this to happen. But at least I can dream again" I admit.

"You dream about me" he wonders.

I bite my lip as I muster up what little courage I stilll had. "I do. And I know I shouldn't. I know it's wrong but all I ever wanted was someone like you. Every time I think of you I'm reminded that I'm stuck with a man who is the complete opposite and I hate it. Years of my life wasted in a marriage that is loveless, I never would have imagined. But life just has a way of kicking my teeth in" I say.

"I hope you know that I think about you all the time. I'm always wondering if you're okay, if you were able to smile today. You have the most beautiful smile when it's not forced. Even with the wine stains" he jokes making me laugh.

"Glad someone thinks so" I admit.

"How about we relax and eat some sushi" he suggests.

"I've never had it before" I admit and he gasps.

"No" he accuses.

"It's true. There's not enough nutrients in it for James and I don't know if I like it or not so I never got it" I shrug.

"Well I got the best sushi in town for you and there's four different kinds so you're bound to like one of them" he claims.

"That's a lot of sushi" I admit.

"It is but I'm a big guy. I like to eat" he claims.

So I sit down with him and we break into the sushi. I loved them all but my favorite was the fried shrimp one. The wasabi was a bit too much for me but it was really good still. I haven't eaten this much in such a long time.

"I wish I knew why you were so good to me" I sigh as the sun starts to set. I knew this day was coming to a end and I'll have to await James' arrival back home tomorrow. But I wasn't ready for today to end.

"I wish you knew how great you were and why I am willing to do all of this just to be around you" he agrees.