Celestial Love (Anthony Rizzo)

.52. Moving On

Celeste

It's the beginning of February now and I was officially moved into Anthony's place. After taking a few months to myself, finding my path and setting it in motion I was ready to move on with my life. To move on with Anthony.

And he was kind enough to let me redesign his place, we add some color and some little decorations here and there. Like I said his place was aesthetically pleasing and there was a lot of different things you could do with it. But I liked a lot of the things he already had and all I wanted to do was put some more to it. The bigger things like tiles and wall designs are going to wait until later on, but for now we got a good start.

I sit in our room with the little stuffed panda that Anthony gave me for my birthday last year sitting in my hands. The smile on my face was big as I admire what is the most beautiful gift I have ever received. I listen to it almost every day, I love what he said and it gave me hope when I didn't have much hope left. And now I'm here with him because I was able to over come all those awful days without him.

"Watcha doing" Anthony asks as he comes into the room. He sits next to me as he rests his hand on my thigh.

"Just remembering how nice it was to have this when I needed it most" I admit.

"You really like it that much" he wonders.

"I do. It's the greatest thing I have" I smile.

He takes the panda from me and presses his stomach. His voice rings out from the bear making him laugh a little. I'm sure to him it was weird, but to me it meant the world.

"I have a question for you" he starts as he hands me the stuffed animal back. I wrap my arms around it as I pull it into my chest.

"What do you want to know" I ask.

"Spring training is at the end of the month and I was hoping that you would want to come with me" he says slowly.

"Baby that is not a question" I remind him as he rolls his eyes.

"Alright smart ass, would you accompany me to spring training" he questions and I smile. I love it when he plays my little games. It makes it so much more fun.

"Well I don't want to stay here without you. I think it would be weird if I was living with you and you weren't even here" I start.

"But..." he trails off.

"But I don't know if I'm ready for spring training. Everyone else knows what to do and what to expect. They have things that keep them busy while you guys are out playing some baseball. Being here without you would be weird but at least this is home" I admit.

"Home is wherever you make it. We can find a nice place to stay and you can go to the pool or spend the day trying out all the recipes you keep saving to your phone but never try. The girls love organizing spa days and going on trips while we're playing. They'll love to have you there with them" he assures me.

"And you know this how" I wonder.

"Because so many of them are already excited to see you again. I know Jess and Paige have already commented on your Instagram post talking about all the adventures you guys will go on and the organization is wonderful with taking care of families when we're away. You couldn't be in better hands until I can hold you myself again" he insists.

A long sigh passes my lips as I look back at the panda. This thing was cute but it wasn't going to keep me company and would never replace the feeling Anthony brings to me. Six weeks is a long time without each other and I feel like we finally just got together too. I wasn't ready to spend so much time away and that means I have to give up some of my fears to gain the love I so desperately cannot love without.

"Alright, I'll come with. I'll still have school and I'll make sure the kids I watch have someone to care for them while I'm gone. But I think it'll be fun" I smile. And I really mean it.

"Great! I was even talking to your mom about her coming down to Arizona for spring break. We can fly her out and set up some nice dinners and go look at the stars" he tells me.

"You've been talking to my mom" I question.

"We talk almost most every day" he claims and I smile. She absolutely adored Anthony, more than she ever liked James. She didn't have a problem with him but she couldn't care less about sports so that stuff never convinced her of anything. And the same can be for Anthony that his baseball status doesn't mean anything to her. His work with the children's hospital and how he handled her and me made her feel better. And that's the greatest kind of love.

"I am sure she would love to come down. She might be more excited to see you than to see me" I joke.

"She could never. You're her pride and joy, her love for you is unrivaled and I know that. But I don't mind being a distant second" he teases.

We sit in bed for a little longer before I put the panda up and we go grab a bite to eat. While it was nice to not have to sneak around I wasn't quite ready for the pictures being taken of me while I eat. I'm not a pretty eater, I've had way too many pictures of me circulating with salad dressing on my face. But luckily for me Anthony doesn't care, I could be dressed as a salad for all he cares. He just wants to enjoy a meal with me.

We find a nice bbq place and decide to eat there. It's taken my body some time to get used to eating real food again. And it was hard to change my eating habits because I had been forced to make do with so little for so long. I felt sick the first few weeks away from James because I was trying to eat whatever I can but my body needed time to adjust. Now there isn't much off the table and I can actually satisfy my cravings.

I order some ribs and Mac and cheese and dig right in. I know I was making a mess but Anthony didn't mind. He was a hot mess too. But we were a mess together and that's what makes it so fun.

Anthony reaches over and wiped some sauce from my face as I giggle. He wiped it on a napkin before going back to his loaded pulled pork sandwich.

"So what do you give the ribs here" he asks me.

"Oh! A 9.5/10 for sure" I nod.

"Hmmm. I'll have to remember that. We'll try Green Street next" he claims.

"You're going to make me unhealthy in the opposite way I was before" I joke.

"And I'll still love you" he promises.