.34. Explination

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Anthony

With the playoffs getting good my parents are in town once again. They make it out to Chicago as much as possible but Florida is their home and this is mine. But my dad wanted to see some post season baseball so that's what he's going to get. And it wouldn't be a party without my mother here.

I set them up in the same hotel I stay in and they knew their way around pretty well. I know that whenever I'm preoccupied they can handle their own. As soon as they get here we get to go to the children's hospital and see the kids. That really brightens my day and gives me extra motivation to play better. I know they get more donations and help when I play good so I'll do whatever it takes to make this awful situation a little less awful.

Once we got to take pictures and mom gets some of them up on the website it was time for lunch. I go to my favorite spot in the city and I have a little surprise there waiting for me.

We walk in and I see Celeste standing to the side looking around the restaurant. It was one of the nicer ones and she looked like she belonged. She had on a deep red romper and her hair half up half down.  The definition of beauty and grace really. It really looked like she was one of those people that you ask yourself if she's famous or not, she looked that good.

"That's a very beautiful woman" my mom admits as she catches my stare. She had no idea what was about to go down.

"That wonderful young lady is the woman I am in love with" I tell her.

She gasps as her eyes grow twice as big as they were before. She looks between us a few times before her eyes land on me. "Anthony, are you being serious" she asks.

"Of course. Would you like to meet her" I wonder.

"Can I" she smiles.

I bring my parents over to Celeste before pulling her into a hug. The scent of her perfume fills my head as I hold her close.

"You made it" I smile.

"It wasn't easy but I'm here" she admits.

"Are you ready for this" I ask as she lets out a short sigh.

"As ready as I'll ever be" she nods.

So we turn around and I introduce her to the parents. I can see that my mom wasn't too sure what to think given what little she knew but it's hard to deny Celeste of her presence in a room.

We get seated and order our food before trying some table talk. Though it was hard with so much in the air.

"I'm sure you guys have a lot of questions" Celeste says from beside me.

"You don't have to tell us anything you don't want to" my moms assures her.

"But you deserve an explanation and I wanted to come here and give it to you myself" Celeste insists. "So what would you like to know?"

"How did you two meet" my dad wonders.

"I uh- I was kind of in the middle of a panic attack right outside of the apartment complex I live in. Honestly it happens a lot, I don't go too many days without my brain being so exhausted it just breaks down. The beginning of this year was hard for me with my mom still in the middle of cancer treatments and my mental health being just about as low as it could be without me ending up in a hospital. I was in a tough spot and it showed on my face.

That night I was really trying to find a sign to keep going. A reason to go up to the penthouse knowing all that awaited me was pain. It turns out what I was looking for was a light so I didn't feel so alone in the dark.

Anthony was that light. He came to me and got me to see that there is a good reason to go on. Even if it's just so I can have some ice cream with a stranger. Never would I have thought that after all of these years of hurting I would have a feeling such as the one your son gives me. From that first day I felt safe and comfortable, things that had become so strange to me.

But I'm so thankful Anthony heard my cries that night. Because of him I now know that I can be happy again" she says as she sets her hand on my thigh. I lace my fingers through hers because it took a lot of courage to say what she said. But she was so strong, so much stronger than she knew.

"I'm so sorry to hear that sweetie" my mom tells her.

"It's okay. I've learned so much in the past six months that sucked to learn but I needed to. Now I see... I see just how much I need to get out of this situation" Celeste explains.

"How are you" my mom wonders.

"Slowly. I used to think that being strong meant holding on, but in some situations the strongest thing you can do is to let go. And it's not easy, letting go of ten years of being with someone no matter how awful is going to be difficult. And there's parts of him that I miss like hell. But I know that best thing for me and even for him is for us to separate. He thinks he can make it through this season before filing for divorce but I'm not so sure. He knows I'm gone but he won't let me go. For the same reasons I stayed so long in the first place. But I'm slowly leaning off of him, not walking on eggshells. I can defend myself now because I know my worth, I have something worth fighting for in Anthony. I just hope I'm strong enough" Celeste admits.

"I think you're the strongest person I know" I say to her as she smiles up at me.

"So what's the plan once you're divorced" my mom wonders.

I stop because we never really talked about it. My main focus was to get her away from him no matter what happens with us. But once he's gone I'm not sure what happens next.

"I don't know" Celeste admits. "I'm sure we will find something to do. Actually go on dates instead of meeting up some place and sneaking around. I don't think I'll be ready to get married again right off the bat, I have ten years worth of damage and baggage to go through and I want to be the absolute best version of myself for Anthony. But before that happens I gotta find out what I am capable of since I've been held down for so long.

But when I dream up of a future it's Anthony I see. I would love to one day get rid of this last name and have Anthony's. To start a family and join you guys in going to the children's hospital. Once the pain subsides and the love can shine through I don't see how anything can stop us from being together" she claims.

"Well I think you would be a wonderful addition to our family. Once you're ready of course" my dad claims.

"Nothing will make me happier" she smiles

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