Chapter 64

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December

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December

I shouldn't have let her go to the restaurant alone.

I shouldn't have left her at home after we made love last night.

I should have told her that I loved her more often.

I thought we had all the time in the world. The future looked so bright. I could picture it — us, getting married, living happily in our Parisian apartment, surrounded by love and laughter.

All my dreams shattered into tiny pieces tonight.

I was aware of my surroundings. I remembered bursting into the ER and threatening to break every damn thing in there if they didn't call doctor Morris. He treated me. I knew he was the best.

Jim had to restrain me when they took Ellie somewhere and didn't let me go with them.

Now, I was staring at the pinkish water disappearing down the drain as Jim tried to wash my girl's blood off my hands.

Jim's hands were shaking, too, but he appeared more collected. He was the glue holding my broken pieces together. I knew Jim called Thierry. I was more than sure everyone was already there, waiting for the doctors, wondering what happened.

Jim splashed some cold water on his face, and then on mine. I was utterly useless, staring at my reflection in the mirror of a hospital bathroom, unable to take a lungful of air.

"Let's go, Aiden." Jim dried his hands with a paper towel and gripped the handle, ready to leave the restroom.

"Give me a minute."

I pressed my forehead to the cold tiles and counted to ten, trying to get my breathing back to normal.

The fear I felt was all-consuming, but I couldn't allow myself to be scared.

My girl was the one who was attacked on an empty street. She must have felt terrified.

Her family would want to know what she was doing there. I would have to tell them that I let her down. I promised to keep her safe and failed.

Even though the guilt was making me sick to my stomach, I needed to face those people. I needed to be strong for Ellie. She didn't agree to marry a coward.

"I'm ready."

Jim nodded and placed his hand on my shoulder, gently nudging me forward as he opened the bathroom door.

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