Chapter 40 - Unexpected Hope

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"Justin, did mom talk to you?" I ask, as we head back to the car after seeing my parents and Cameron off at the airport.

"Yes. Why?"

"Well, aren't you upset?" I question, slightly perplexed by his somewhat carefree demeanor.

"Mila, nothing is certain until it actually is. There's a possibility that she may survive," he explains. He seems so confident and sure.

"But she may not," I reply.

"You have to choose to either believe that everything will be okay and enjoy the present or you can worry about tomorrow. I choose to believe. I want to enjoy life, and I know mom would want us too as well. Why think sad thoughts when it isn't even known what will end up happening?" he says.

I am completely blown away by how insightful he is.

"Do you believe in magic?" I ask curiously.

"What do you mean? Like men in suits pulling rabbits from their hats?" he questions with a chuckle.

"Gosh no. Magic, like things you can't explain. Having faith."

"I guess, in a sense I do. I want to believe that mom is going to be okay and I know that if she is, it is going to be nothing short of a miracle, or magic, if you want to call it that. But I do believe that miraculous things do happen. That's what I'm hoping for."

Justin's answer makes me smile. He has surprisingly been able to say exactly what I needed to hear. He doesn't know it, but has just given me the very thing that I needed most. Hope.

Cameron's view on the matter was completely different. I had asked him earlier that morning what he thought about mom and he didn't think that her odds of survival were very high. I understood where he was coming from. He was a boy who based his beliefs on facts and hardcore evidence, very much like I did. He, of course, has too. He is a premed student. In medicine you cannot wait around and hope for a miracle. Cameron is choosing to believe that mom is dying and that in a few months she will be gone. He told me that the sooner I understand the severity of her condition, the sooner that I can come to accept it.

That's just the thing though. I cannot accept it. I don't want to. That's ultimately why I sought out Justin's opinion on the matter. I knew he would have a different perspective. He was always a carefree boy, very much like Josh. He doesn't let things bother him, or at least he doesn't show it. However, unlike Josh, Justin can be a self-centered jerk at times. But when he does care about something, he cares with his whole heart.

I chose to believe Justin's theory about life. I just can't accept the idea that my mom may not live to see her four children grow up. It is an unnerving thought that makes me disturbingly sad.

It is in that instant that I make up my mind. My mother is going to live. She is going to survive and see her children age with grace and beauty. I am new to the whole believing in the unseen, so I don't know how exactly miracles work. Maybe you don't have to understand them in order for them to take place?

***

La Isla Nina is already docked when I am dropped off at the beach. I find a lounge chair beneath a shady palm tree and relax as I wait for Josh. I grab my sunglasses from my bag and put them on in hopes of remaining hidden from Adam-Miguel.

It turns out that I didn't need the shades because as soon as I put them on, I notice Josh walking over to me.

"Have you been waiting long?" Josh asks.

"No, just got here," I answer.

"Your parents and Cameron are gone, right? How are you doing?"

"Better, now," I say with a smile. Being around Josh makes me forget all of my troubles and the worries I have about my mother. Being around him I start to feel as if anything is possible.

"Are you ready?" he asks with a grin. His eyes appear to dance in the sunlight.

"Yeah. What are we doing exactly?" I ask curiously.

"You'll see," he says with a slight laugh. I really wonder where he is taking me. I

He helps me up and we walk over to his dad's Jeep. We drive along the familiar curvy road that leads into town, but after a while we turn off of the paved street and make our way down a dirt road that cuts through the middle of a jungle. The Jeep bounces up and down as it crosses over the rocky terrain. The sudden jerky movements and sudden turns, have me starting to feel sick.

"Where... are.... you... taking... me?" I struggle to ask.

"Don't worry, we're almost there," he answers, completely unphased by the swaying of the vehicle.

The trees begin to thin out and, up ahead in front of us, I can see something blue through the patches of dense vegetation. The further we drive and the closer we get to the bright blue beyond the trees, I am able to determine what it is exactly.

And I don't like it. I don't like it at all.

I jerk back into my seat as Josh stops the Jeep suddenly. Even though we aren't moving anymore I still feel like I am on a roller coaster.

My door opens. I look up and see Josh standing beside me. I hadn't even noticed that he had gotten out of the vehicle. I reach for his extended hand and he helps me down to the ground. I feel my knees give way and I start to fall. He catches me before I hit the floor.

"Thanks, I'm just a little dizzy."

"Yeah, that road takes some getting used to," he says nervously. Why does he seem nervous?

He opens the trunk and pulls out a large red cooler that he balances on his shoulder. The site of the cooler instantly reminds me of just how hungry I am. I really hope that there is food in the cooler and not just bottles of water. He places his free hand in mine and we begin to walk toward the clearing in the trees... toward the water.

 toward the water

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