But Now We're Stressed Out

Goodbye my love

Okay

So

Today started tech/rehearsal week for me

I'm so excited!!

And also incredibly nervous

I'm just in the ensemble but I'm still excited

Anyways, those of you that have performed n musicals or plays, you'll understand how stressful and insane this week will be for me

For those of you that haven't, It's a crazy hell were I spend four and a half hours every day after school at the theater

So I don't know if I'll be updating much this week

I'm really sorry about that but this week will be exhausting

Sorry

I'm questioning my sanity after writing this chapter

TRIGGER WARNINGS : suicide, self harm (cutting), talks about hitting, fire, blood

Logan POV
I don't think I've moved this fast in a long time. Probably not since I was forced to take gym when I was younger.

But I ran to my car and drove as quickly to Patton's house as possible. Well, I didn't go over the speed limit but I tried my best.

The ten or so minutes it takes to get from the school to Patton's house were excruciating. I can't process the text I received from Patton.

Is he actually trying to attempt suicide?

Why?

I pulled into the driveway of Patton's house in record time. My heart was pounding in my chest and I felt as if I couldn't breath.

My world was shattering at the thought of Patton dying by his own hand. Or just dying in general. I can't loose him.

I knocked on the door frantically, begging and wishing for Patton to open the door. Despite being an atheist and knowing quite well that science disproves any type of God, I was praying to whatever was out there to not let Patton die.

"We don't fucking have time for his bullshit!" Remy yelled. He raised his foot and kicked the door open. The flimsy lock fell to the ground with a clang.

We all instantly rushed into the house and searched for Patton. I ran up to his bedroom, terrified of what I might find.

Despite my fear of what I might see, I threw the door open. My eyes darted around the room, looking for any sign of Patton.

But he wasn't here.

I even checked under the bed and in the closet, but he wasn't in his room. I started looking around frantically. For anything.

A razor. A pill bottle. A knife. A letter. Anything that could explain to me what happened to Patton or where he couldn't gone.

I looked out of his room across the hall. The bathroom door was shut.

Quickly, I headed across the hall. I paused and gingerly set my hand on the doorknob. I could hear everyone yelling at each downstairs. Patton wasn't there.

Slowly, I pushed open the bathroom door. I let out a gut wrenching scream of Patton's name and fell to the floor.

Patton was laying fully clothed in the bathtub. The tub was full with blood filled water. Deep cuts were in his arms.

The bathroom floor was splattered with blood and a bloodied razor. His phone was sitting on the counter next to the sink.

I put a hand to my mouth to try and muffle my sobs. I couldn't my eyes off Patton. But the longer I looked at him, the more I seemed to noticed things.