𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐋𝐏𝐇𝐀〔𝐤.𝐧𝐣 𝐱 𝐣.𝐣𝐤〕

21

Taehyung looked with a shocked expression at his brother.

"Oh dammit? Are you kidding me? You.. You should be happy that you're still alive!" the blue-haired said with tears in his eyes.

Namjoon didn't respond and just looked down at his hands.
"What would I do if I'd lose my brother? My Idol! My role model! You're the one I'm looking up to. I- I can't lose you, Joonie."

The older brother sighed and took Taehyung's hand.
"Don't lie to yourself," laughed Namjoon, but Taehyung didn't find this funny at all.
"Why are you like this? Believe me! I can't live without you. Why would you want to die?" the youngest whispered and gave Namjoon's hand a little squeeze.

His brother laughed ironically now.
"Why I want to die? My whole life is a fucking mess. People are beating me up almost every damn day. And some people don't care when I say 'stop' because they just want to rape me, okay? I had no fucking friends that care about me. They all just looked at me when something happened to me. Not a single soul cared about me until last month.
Hah, I'm poor. I hate myself. Who the fuck loves this? Oh god, I would love myself but I can't! My beauty is a reason why people hate me! And why people rape me, not to forget.
No, beauty isn't always something good.
People can make you feel ugly even though you're not.
I know some of them are jealous.
But tell me, who's really jealous of a life that I live right now?
Our parents rejected us and we had to live with real humans.
I had to control my whole emotions and I needed to make sure that you feel good.
But I? I'm always a reason that there's a fight.
Oh Luna, my life hates me.
I have to keep my emotions a secret but I'm already weak.
I don't even have a mate. I just want a mate, okay? My inner Omega starts to suffer and I can feel it.
My whole life I made sure that other people are alright. But who made sure that I was alright? No one.
I don't even care who my mate is. He should be nice, make me feel safe. I want to cuddle him, I want to feel happy.
I want to come to my mate when I'm sad and I want to love myself again, okay?
But people don't see how much I suffer.
And now I want you to leave, thanks."

The other two wolves looked shocked as Namjoon told them his real feelings.
"Please leave me alone for a while. I'm begging you," said Namjoon with a quiet voice, trying to suppress his tears.
I shouldn't have said that, it was selfish.

Taehyung and Jungkook really wanted to say something but didn't know what.
So they just followed Namjoon's request and left the room silently.

As soon as the door was closed, the brunette let his tears run free.
Choked sobs and little whimpers echoed through the room.
"Life doesn't want me to be happy," the omega said to himself.
More and more tears fell onto the bedsheets.

Namjoon was sick of crying, he cried too much in the last weeks. Well, he cried too much his whole life.
He really wanted to be happy but he can't.
He was damn 20 years old.
Other wolves found their mate almost immediately but Namjoon didn't have luck.
Did his mate live on the other side of the world? Was his mate already dead?
He really hoped his mate would come soon. He'd be 21 soon and his life wouldn't get easier.
Namjoon didn't even know how to protect himself. And his friends wouldn't always be there for him.
Who knows? Maybe his new friends will leave him soon.

Omegas needed a mate. You could clearly see that Namjoon was the proof for this.
He hoped to be happy one day.
And the brunette really hoped his happy day wouldn't be the day where he'd kill himself.

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Ehh, Idk if I like this chapter or not.