I Will Survive... with Louis Tomlinson?

Chapter 39.

Scarlett's POV

"Scarlett, is that you?"

"Yeah." I sniffled quietly as I walked back into Maria's house. My head was hung low, I was ashamed that I spent the entire journey home in the back of a taxi crying my eyes out and pouring all my feelings to the taxi driver, he tried his best to offer some advice but it didn't help in the slightest. I even attempted to laugh at his extremely cheesy joke but all that came out was more coughs and splutters. I probably looked like a horrendous mess, no doubt he couldn't wait to get rid of me. What was I doing with myself?

"Oh hunny, what happened?" Maria sympathised as she greeted me in the hallway with a humongous hug which I naturally fell into. My guitar dropped the last couple of inches to the floor without my assistance, only creating a small thud on the floorboards. Her hand began rubbing small circles on my back as I tried to stop the hiccups which were threatening to start. The tears were beginning to decrease as well as the sniffles.

"Maria I don't know if I can do this." I eventually replied with a subtle hiccup, they had already formed and I couldn't stop them. My body would every so often jump due to the irregular breathing causing my breath to hitch whenever I tried to speak.

"What can't you do?" She gently spoke, still rubbing my back like a caring mother would do. I felt safe in her arms, she may only be a couple years older but right now she felt like my mum, she had that way about her.

"I still love him." I spluttered out, falling slightly out of the embrace so I could see her face and reaction.

"Of course you do, it's only been a day, it's not going to go away overnight."

"I don't want to love him though." I stuttered, a fresh stream of tears falling from my eyes due to the realisation of what I just said. I don't want to love him, I can't love him, it's no good for me. But the way he looked at me choked me up inside, I was regretting walking away more with every second that went past but I can't let myself fall back that easily.

"Now is that your head or heart speaking?" She cooed, placing her arms on my shoulders, forcing me to look her directly in the eyes. I took a minute to think through my answer, taking a deep breath as I do so.

"My head." I quietly replied.

"It's your heart that still has the feelings then?"

"Why is life so hard?" I whined, leaning back against Maria as she chuckled into my messy hair thrown about the place on top of my head.

"Because life is a rollercoaster, you've just got to go with it." I sighed in response, knowing she was right. "It'll get better, you'll see."

"I don't see how much worse it could get."

"Now then Miss Grumpy Pants, turn that frown upside down." She joked, pulling at the corners of my mouth causing a loud laugh to escape my lips. "Better." She grinned, obviously pleased with her work. "Now don't leave me to eat this tub of ice-cream on my own this time."

"Try and stop me." I smiled effortlessly as she pulled me through into the living room. My guitar still slumped on the floor but it was safe there, unless Maria's cat decided to use it as a scratching post.

"Are you sure you don't want anything to eat before you go?" Maria asked for the twentieth time this morning.

"Yes, I'm still full up from the ice-cream last night." I chuckled, rolling my eyes playfully at her.

"I'm just checking, I don't want you to starve yourself."

"Maria, there is an extremely low chance of that, me and food go together like Hermione and books."