BENEATH THE STARS

The Miller Charm

Chapter 33: The Miller Charm

"So, tell me," she said and I looked over at Ash and he nodded.

"Mom, I guess we should sit down for this."

"Okayy," she said suspiciously but sat down on my bed nonetheless.

I sat across from her and Ash sat next to me.

"So, you know that Andrea said some awful things and I had heard everything... Well, at that time I didn't hear dad say anything to stop her so all I could think of was how lonely and unwanted I actually was. So, I went over to the cliff and..."

"Josh... you... don't tell me you tried to..."

"I did. I'm really really sorry, but that was the only way I could escape. I couldn't live without Phil... it was too hard. I'd locked myself in my room for a long time and when I was finally able to get out all I heard was mom... I mean Andrea saying how much of a shame I am to the family and how she feels dad and her should disown me... I didn't want to be a burden mom... all I ever wanted was someone to be there with me when Phil died... I didn't want to hear how much of a coward I had been. All I could think of was dying at that moment... so I went to the cliff and... when I was about to jump, Kate pulled me back. She listened to me while I told her why I decided to end my life and she told me why I should not."

"Oh my god Josh!! I can't... did you really feel you were a burden? You don't think that now, do you? I am so sorry..."

"Mom, it's fine... I swear. Though I feel bad about what I would have done, I'm glad I did... it made me realize how important life is and how grateful I am to have you guys."

"If not for your girlfriend, I'd have lost another son of mine... I can't believe I ever thought of leaving you guys to deal with that bitch. I'll move back."

"What?"

"I'll move back... I don't want that woman in my house anymore... I'm gonna come back and kick her out of there."

"Kick whom out of where?" dad asked as he entered my room and kissed mom before sitting beside her.

"Mom is moving back to New York!!"

"Good for you... wait what? Lisaa??"

"He's not joking... I'm moving back!"

"You really are???"

"Yess."

"Oh my goddd!!" Dad yelled as he kissed mom.

When they didn't separate for a while, I and Ash took it as our que to leave them alone.

"I'm so proud of you babe," Ash said when we were safely sat in the kitchen.

"Really?"

"So very proud Josh!! You didn't break down while telling her the truth and I'm glad you told her... she knows you more than Andrea ever did."

"She's my mother Ashy, she knows me well enough since before we came here."

"True... so, when do you plan telling dad?"

"I honestly don't know... he'll blame himself for everything and I don't want that."

"Just tell him like you told mom..."

"Tell what?" dad asked as he came downstairs. Why is everyone interrupting every conversation I'm having??

"Uh... Josh wants to talk to you," Ash said as he pushed me ahead.

"What's the matter son?"

"I just told mom, that's kinda the reason why she is moving back... and I feel you should know too."

"What are you talking about?"

"Jo... oh, sorry... can I talk to you Josh?" mom asked.

"Yeah, sure mom, I'll be back dad," I say following mom to the kitchen.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I just wanted to say that... you are an amazing son and I love you more than anything. I know I've said this like a hundred times since you came but I mean it and I want you to always remember that."

"I know mom and I love you too. I wish I'd have grown up with you... it would have been nice."

"Me too honey. Also... I'd love to meet your girlfriend, I wanna thank her for saving my son."

"She's not my girlfriend."

"Well, she will be soon... I know you are planning to ask her out."

"You are so mom, mom... Andrea never knew anything about me. I bet she doesn't even know my name."

"Let's not talk about that bitch. Are you gonna tell your father... about your stunt?"

"Okay first... it was not a stunt and I guess I should... he should know too. Can you please stay with him?"

"Yes, I will. C'mon."

"Thanks mom."

"Don't thank me Josh... I'm your mother, I'll always be here for you."

"Good you both are back... I was starting to get worried," dad said as we came back to the living room.

"No need to worry honey," mom said sitting beside dad.

"So, what is all this about?"

"Uh... I'm not sure this is a good idea," I say looking at Ash.

"You can do this babe, just one more person to tell."

"Ash..."

"Do it."

"Am I supposed to know or not?"

"Sorry dad... I just... you remember Andrea talking about how guys should disown me and stuff?"

"Yes, I do... but as I told you earlier, it was her saying those things... I don't think you are anything but an amazing son, Josh... I hope you know that."

"I do know it dad, but back then I didn't... and I attempted suicide... I won't say attempted, I tried to attempt suicide. I tried to jump down the cliff but Kate pulled me back and talked with me and made me understand that suicide was not an option. I'm sorry dad."

"Is this true?" he asked Ash and mom and they both nodded.

"Can I have a moment alone with you son?"

"Sure dad," I say as Ash and mom head out the living room.

"I have said this tons of times before and I'll say this as many times as I need to son... I love you... I want you to come to me and talk to me whenever you want to without hesitating... I want you to know that I'm your father and your friend. I'm sorry for whatever happened back then but here on I want you to talk to me or your mother if anything is bothering you... we are always gonna be there for you... I feel bad you didn't feel like talking to me when you thought it was best to end your life... I don't want that again... I can't lose another son. I want to see you grow up and be a great man... with a lovely family... promise me you will talk with me if you feel hopeless, or with anyone for that matter."

"I promise you dad, I'll come to you if I wanna talk... I love you too. I didn't know then, you never actually told me that, it was Phil who always told me that you loved me... if only you would have told me yourself, things would have happened differently. I do not blame you so let's just forget everything and move on, yeah?"

"Anything you want... I just want you to be comfortable with me."

"While on this topic, can I ask you for an advice?"

"Okay?"

"I am planning on asking out Kate... help me plan it?" I asked and dad chuckled.

"There's nothing to plan son... just do it when you feel it's the right time. I didn't plan on asking your mom out either... I wanted to but when I felt it was the right moment, I blurted out and your mom just laughed for five minutes straight but then she saw I was serious and she said yes."

"Something tells me that it's gonna be the same with Kate..."

"You can plan where to take her though... any place where she can be herself and you can see her smile."

"I know exactly where I am gonna take her... I just hope she says yes."

"Oh, she will, no one can say no to the Miller charm!"

"Dad... seriously?" I ask laughing.

"Yeah... your mother, Stephanie... even your grandmother was not able to say no... it's just something we Millers have in us to make the ladies say yes."

"Sure dad, I believe that's true."

"It is."

"I said I believe it."

"As you should."

"Thanks dad."

"Anytime Josh."

"I feel light. Can we do something to celebrate me telling the truth and mom coming back?"

"We sure can... what do you wanna do?"

"Oh well, I wanted to try a beer... but I guess we should let mom decide."

"You are not gonna drink beer at this age, young man!"

"I was just kidding dad... look at your face!" I said laughing my ass off.

"I am not though... do not even think you can drink."

"My bad... I won't drink, I promise."

"Why is there yelling?" mom called out as she came running in the living room and I couldn't help but laugh at the way she and Ash looked terrified.

"Your son here, thinks he can drink beer at this age," dad told her.

"That's it? I thought you guys were fighting or something."

"That's it?? That's what you are gonna say? He thinks it's okay to drink beer Lisa!!"

"Okay, calm down... I was just joking! I won't drink."

"See, he said he won't drink."

"Good. If I ever catch you drinking Josh... I swear I'll ground you from leaving the house ever again."

"Why do you think I wouldn't be able to smuggle some inside without you noticing? I and Phil used to smuggle candy bars in our rooms when you used to ban us from having them for weeks."

"That's my son... I'm so proud."

"YOU ARE NOT GONNA DRINK ANY KIND OF ALCOHOL!"

"Oh honey, he won't. I'll make sure he doesn't," mom said, winking at me which made me laugh even more.

"Babe, I guess you should stop laughing cuz he doesn't look like he's believing you when you say you won't consume alcohol."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry... it was just so funny. Sorry... I won't have alcohol dad, don't worry. Let's celebrate mom coming back, shall we?"

"Ohh... let's have a barbecue!!" mom squealed excitedly.

"Alright. I'll get the stuff out of the garage... boys, help your mother."

"Yessir!"

We helped mom with all the chopping and spices and with whatever she needed. Dad had set up everything outside as we took the food out. Ash wanted to eat s'mores so he'd gone to the supermarket to get more marshmallows and crackers. Dad had lit up the charcoal and mom was inside making the sauce. Ash came after some time and put the crackers and marshmallows on the table and went in to get the chocolate. I was helping mom put meat on the grill.

When the meat was done, dad cut it into pieces and we all started to eat as mom put some of the vegetables and salmon on the grill. This is what family feels like, I thought as we ate our dinner. Ash was quite excited to make s'mores... he loved them; I mean who doesn't but I'd never seen Ash so excited about something. After finishing every single thing on the plates we all started roasting the marshmallows and making our own s'mores. Best day of my life I'd say other than the events that took place between Drake and Kate. I hope they make up till I get back.

"This was amazing!" Ash said as he sat back content with his s'mores.

"I wish Phil was here with all of us, I miss him," mom said looking at the stars above.

"He is right here with us mom, I can feel his presence. He is happy that we are all happy."

"You are right."

"Now, this feels like family," dad said, hugging mom from the side.

"It does."

There I was again... happy that I didn't jump from the cliff that day, happy that Kate was courageous enough to pull me back, happy that Ash was back with me, happy that I got a family and happy that they were just as happy as I was. Some things take time to make sense but when they do, that's all that matters. If someone would have told me I was going to be enjoying s'mores with my dad, my mom whom I didn't know existed, my best friend who I thought would never come back to me, I'd have probably pulled them with me as I jumped down the cliff, but right now this is what matters... Phil did leave me but he left me with the people who loved me... and for that I was grateful to him.

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Heyy guys!!
Soooo... how was it?? Personally, I loved it!

I honestly don't know how many chapters are remaining now... I was aiming for just three more chapters, but as you can tell, my one chapter got divided into three itself so I'm hoping to actually end this book soon.

Also.... dat Asmr up there is sooo damn satisfying!!!!!! I love asmrs wayyy tooo much after having watched every episode of J💚SMR XD XD

Stay tuned!
Lots of lovee💕

------- B. H;))