Zih'aira

Chapter 18

Zih ,

When I awoke I heard beeping machines. IV's were hooked up to me on booth arms. My throat was dry and my eyes were extremely heavy. I was very weak. I turned my head and saw my dad asleep in the chair and Karens purse in the other. I guess she stepped out.

"Daddy."

I whispered.

He didnt bulge.

"Dad--."

I began to cough. This cotton mouth and dry throat was the cause.

"Huh? Zih baby how are you feeling?"

He jumped up and moved closer.

"Im ok. Where is Kartion?"

"Hes with Jesus."

"Oh my. I need to leave. I had things to do today."

I said trying to sit up but quickly regretted it when I felt the soreness from my mid section.

"No! You got to lay back down. Doc said to take it slow for about a week. You only got a few more days left."

"Few more days? Daddy how long have I been here?"

"Four days."

"FOUR DAYS!"

I yelled.

"Calm down. Your ok now Zih. You know you lost a lot of blood. Your were so close to dying. You miscarried due to stress. Your blood pressure was extremely high too."

I took in two deep breaths.

"Whos baby was it?"

My dad asked.

"Montanas."

He just nodded and turned his attention to the television.

Minutes later Karen came back with food and a smile. She screamed when she noticed me awake. After informing me on what my dad just told me we sat in a silence.

"Mrs. King! Hes awoke! Hurry!"

A nurse yelled running into my room.

"Karti is awake?"

I asked.

She shook her head into the positive.

My eyes bucked. I told her to bring me a wheelchair. I wanted to go see him also.

An hour later my dad, Karen, Jesus, his wife Maria, Nico, who is Karti close cousin, Meagan and Kartion and I were all sitting in Karti's room. Even though this many visitors in a room was against hospital policy we didnt care.

"How do you feel?"

I asked, holding his hand.

"Tired."

He replied joking. Causing everyone to laugh.

"You had us scared for a minute."

My dad said, holding Karen close to him.

"I apologize."

His eyes looked sad. He looked deep into me while holding Kartion on his good leg.

"When I was in a coma I heard everything. I heard all of you talking to me. Crying, praying, laughing and what not. The only fucked up thing was yall didnt hear me replying. Sometimes yall voices felt as if it was fading away. That scared me. Ma I cried when I heard your cries. I couldnt console you. That hurts. But something happened. I heard you Zih. I heard you cry, then it turned into an agonizing scream. Like a scream for help. You were in deep pain. I tried to save you but the longer I couldnt get to you the more your screams faded. I didnt give up though. Even when they stopped completly. I knew you needed me. I promised to never leave you. Here I am baby."

My face was drenched in tears. Salty tears. I couldnt believe what he was saying.

For hours we all sat in his room and talked and played catch up. He didnt ask me what happened. Maybe because he didnt want everyone in our business which I was glad of.

It was going on 9 o clock when everyone decided to leave. Jesus decided to take Kartion home with him. I was glad of that also.

"So, what happened?"

He asked when It was only us in the room.

"I had a miscarriage. A very bad one."

We looked into eachothera eyes long and hard. I knew he was upset and surprisinly I felt bad.

"It was ole boys baby huh?"

He asked with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yeah..."

I replied just above a whisper

He chucked, which caused me to look confused.

"What the fuck is so funny Kartier?"

"You ma. Your funny."

He said harshly.

"Explain."

"I shouldnt have to Zih'aira."

I gave him a very stern look and turned the wheelchair I was sitting in towards the tv.

While focusing on the tv, Karti stole more then a few glances of me.

"Stop looking at me."

I demanded. He didnt.

"Are you deaf?"

I yelled.

"Yo chill. Throw away the attitude right fucking now. I didnt do shit to you but laugh at your dumb ass!"

"Dumb? Please inform me on how Im dumb you ass!"

I was becoming frustrated.

"Your dumb. You forgive ole dude who not only fucked another bitch in your house but the bitch was one of your bestfriends and get pregbant but still hold this grudge over a nigga who was sacrafising to protect his family!"

"Please dont go there Karti! What is done is fucking done! Let it go!"

"No. Im not letting shit go. That shit is foul as fuck and you know it."

I just sat there silent. I knew he would react like this.

"I lost the baby and I doubt If I'll ever be able to produce again. So it is what it is."

I said, wiping a small tear out of my eye.

"Look. Zih Im sorry alright?"

"No. Dont be sorry. Your right. The shit is foul..."

I cried a little more, realizing that this is who Im in love with still. Yes, I love Montana but Im in love with Kartier.