But to love is to live. (Criminal Minds)

XXXV. Pictures Hanging on the Wall

That night JJ walked out of her daughter's bedroom. Grace was exhausted but she couldn't settle herself enough to sleep. JJ laid with her until Grace was in a deep sleep. Grace was doing good but since the trial, she had relapsed into a state of barely eating and sleeping. Grace's heart was shattering and JJ had been too busy trying to keep her daughter together that she never saw that she was falling apart. A picture caught her eye. It was one of her favorites. She was in a bath filled with bubbles. Her hair was pulled back and up the tops of her shoulders and chest was the only thing seen. She was holding Grace up so her torso was out of the water. Grace couldn't have been more than a year old. She and Grace had matching smiles.

JJ walked through the door on a long day at work and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with her wife and daughter. She walked through the front door dropping her bag on the floor and placing her keys into the bowl on the table with a thump. She tiredly walked into the living room. She instantly perked up when she saw her wife sitting cross-legged in front of Grace with a big goofy face. JJ walked over leaning down and she kissed Emily's head before sitting on the floor gently. Grace totaled over to her plopping down in JJS crossed legs. JJ nearly cried at her daughter's weight on her chest. JJ leaned down kissing Grace's head. Breathing in her baby scent. 

"How was work?" Emily asked 

"Long and boring. I'm glad to be home with my best girls."

Emily smiled gently "So are we baby."

She missed her daughter so much. Emily scooted overreaching her hand to caress her wife's face.

"Baby you look tired."

JJ rolled her eyes "Thanks, babe."

"I never said you still weren't the most gorgeous lady I have ever met."

"Mmh" JJ hummed her eyes closing as she leaned into the couch holding onto Grace.

"Why don't I go start a bath for you while you and Gracie girl cuddle."

JJ groaned "Gah I love you."

Emily smirked "Keep talking like that and we will cuddle tonight."

JJ blushed but didn't tell her wife no. JJ watched her wife's every movement as she stood up walking to the stairs. Emily caught her wife winkling mischievously. JJ pulled Grace up so they were face to face. "Did you have a good day?"

Grace just smiled.

JJ smiled back bringing Grace back down to her chest.

Ten minutes later Emily walked down. She leaned down to take Grace from JJ. JJ pouted holding harder onto Grace. Emily smiled gently "You go soak while I feed her."

"Bring her up when she's done?"

Emily kissed her "Always."

JJ walked into the master bath gasping at the glorious bubble bath in their large clawfoot tub that awaited her. She stripped, throwing her long locks into a top knot she then dipped her toe elegantly into the tub. As she sat down she let out a sinful sigh as her muscles relaxed. She sank into the tub closing her eyes. She doesn't know how much time had passed when there was a gentle knock on the bathroom door.

"Come in."

Emily walked in with a messy Grace in her arms. JJ smiled widely reaching both her hands out "Give me my baby!"

Emily laughed handing Grace to JJ. Emily sat on the stool by the tub watching the two play in the bubbles. JJ dipped her finger into the suds dapping some onto Grace's nose making her squeal with delight. JJ smiled widely lifting her daughter too lost in her little girl to notice Emily had sneaked her phone out to take a picture of the two. After a little while, JJ scooted forward asking "Join us?"

Emily quickly stripped climbing in behind her wife. The tub was still warm from when JJ was against it but nothing was better than the feeling she got when JJ would relax into her front.

As JJ stood in the hallway gazing at the picture that same warmth retired as Emily came up behind her kissing that sweet spot right below her ear. "Baby?"

JJ hummed saying "She was so little."

Emily kissed JJs shoulder "I like to think she's still little."

"Emily we... we couldn't protect her. Why couldn't we protect her?" JJ broke

Emily had tears in her eyes "Oh honey." Emily had no response because she herself didn't know. She couldn't come up with some wise words of comfort to help her wife or take the way of her pain while she was still hurting. She just held her wife letting her sobs calm before whispering "Why don't we get into that beautiful tub in our bathroom."

JJ nods as Emily leads her into the master. JJ gently closed the door. And just like all those years ago the two delicately slipped into the hot water holding onto one another until the water ran cold.