Mia's POV.
My eyes flustered opened faintly. My head etched with severe headache, the obvious reaction from consuming that amount of alcohol last night. I winced, realising reality had set in once again. The event that attributed to my gifted hangover played in my head. I was in an oversized t-shirt, definitely Alan's. My eyes searched around for him, for the bedroom held only one human being which was me.
A new day Mia.
Tell him the truth or get out of his apartment.
I stretched up from the bed and lolled on the head board. I wasn't dumb, I recalled everything that occured last night. Deep down, I wondered if it was guilt that triggered me to also sleep with Alan.
Did I sleep with him. I remembered when our clothes coming off, our naked bodies been moulded together.
Oh God, I was a puta. I'd slept with the two brothers all in the same week. This wasn't me. How was I turning into this kind of female?
Tell him the truth, slut.
"Hey good morning." He leaned by the door, donned in a cotton white singlet, his raven hair was swept back with just a few stubborn strands plucking out like cactus. This was the face I had desperately missed, yearned to see. The past months, he wasn't here, I was in a muddled quod and now that he was here I was still incarcerated in that prison. Now I had the desire to make him disappear. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, I think." My fingers doddled on the duvet, in an effort to obscure the tentative look on my face.
"Didn't think you were a snorer." He chuckled, advanced towards me and handed me the glass he was securing in his hand.
It was water.
"I don't."
"Oh you do sweetheart." He lounged on to the bed, burrowing his eyes in mine. It should have been a surreal moment, where I would kiss him and we'd entangle in ravishing session of love making. This however, only made me more edgy than I'd ever been. It made me think he was perusing my transgression in my head.
About the snoring too, I was highly embarrassed.
"Your clothes are in the washing machine. It'll be dried soon." He closed my hand over his. He wasn't staring at me as initially. He was disturbed, probed with questions that needed answers.
"Thank you." My voice cracked.
Silence overwhelmed the bedroom. For lovers like Alan and myself, it wasn't supposed to be like that. But I needed to drink in the silence, to counteract the fear that treathened to engulf me, for my mind was in far away oasis and any long talks would distort my cognition. For Alan, his eyes were bent, glued on the mattress and I wondered what could he be possibly reasoning about.
Just yesterday, I made my big declaration of my love for Alan to Alaric. It was a grand speech I confidently delivered. The urge to repeat the same words to the principal figure was negative on in an integer scale.
"Why would allow yourself to get insanely drunk yesterday Mia?" First probing question asked. It was only a matter of time before more ghastly ones slipped in.
Use this chance to tell him the truth.
Tell him the truth, Mia.
"Honestly, when you drove away like that, I never thought you'd want to see me again." My voice cracked, tears were starting to form.
"Well I wasn't, not after what I saw. I didn't want to believe you but somehow I do when you say you love me. Seeing you with Alaric, that was a bolt on a landscape, Mia." He said.
"I'm so sorry, Alan." I rubbed my eyes, not giving the opportunity for even the tiniest shed of tear to trickle down.
"It's okay. I was upset yesterday, but if you were crazy enough to get wasted for me, I can easily forgive that."Just please don't ever get drunk again. Doesn't look good on you." He drew me closer to him so that my head was lolling on his midriff.
It should have felt good. Every thing should have gone back to normal and to ordinary sight, it was, but not within me. The peace that torched the room laid on my skin like poison. It seeped into my blood and paralysed my brain.
I could forget about, throw the memory into a trash can and if he ever found out from somewhere else it would be circumstantial.
Tell him the truth.
I gripped his vest unconsciously. Hot sweat incinerated my forehead and arms. I just couldn't hide it from him.
"Alan I need to tell you something. You're going to hate me or not want to be with me anymore but I can't pretend everything is alright when I feel like a dirt on the inside." I rambled on. I didn't think I was making sense but when I opened my eyes and it landed on his, it announced, okay I'm listening, tell me.
"There's more to what you saw between me and Alaric yesterday. I'm sorry Alan. You have no idea, how pathetic I feel. How__" It was useless. Tears never solved anything. I'd known that since my mother died. It didn't do anything for me, it certainly wouldn't now.
"Mia. What did you and Alaric do. Are you in love with him?" The void in his eyes were hurt that was inflicted unintentionally.
"No. Alan I'm not. I swear I love you. I just....Oh God."
"What did you do Mia?"
I stumbled to my knees and gazed at him with face now morphed into waterfall. "We....slept together."
It was subtle how quickly love turned into hate without you even having to try. In the long run, you spontaneously let the negative emotions swallow and pour acid into your soul. When that happens, the hatred never ebbs, it only multiples.
That was how I sussed Alan to feel towards me from that moment.
As he stood rigidly, dumbfounded, his inner peace had been shattered. Maybe the silence was in hope for me to yell that it was a prank and I had successfully cajoled him. Heck, I wished it was a joke too.
"You're not serious right? Tell me this is a joke Mia." The words were calm and collected but his tone was far from innocuous.
"I'm Sorry Alan. Please forgive me."
"I don't believe this. I defended you Mia. When Alaric was calling you all sorts of names, I stood up for you. Now you've proven him right and me wrong." He moved away from my touch like it would resort to an electric shock.
Apology couldn't erase the pain that marked on him. He wouldn't want to be with me now. No rational person would.
"Alan I'm sorry. I know it's not enough to say that but truly I am."
"You know something, now I'm just wondering Mia if it was that guilt that coaxed you into sleeping with me too last night. He chuckled. "Was it?"
Silence reigned.
"Damnit." He restrained himself from reiterating a lot of caustic remarks.
At this juncture, I would unhesitantly kowtow to any scurrilous container he pushed me into.
"You just slashed at me with betrayal and disloyalty, Mia." He stared into his palms. "I'm going to check if your clothes are ready, then I'll call in a cab to get you."
I feel like this is the end of the road for those two. I'm really sad. Tell me whst you guys think of this chapter.
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