Damon
I fall on the floor on my hands. My entire life is flashing in front of my eyes. Every giggle I ever heard, every laugh, every single time she said my name, every time she told me she loved me, even every moan I heard from her. I hear it all. I will never hear these things ever again. Not from the girl I want to hear it from.
I close my eyes. I have a little piece of hope left that this is all a dream. While the tears roll down my face, I pray to God that this is not happening. I pray that I just sit on the couch, with Abby next to me. I would tell her how much I love her, one more time. She would tell me how much she loves me and I would kiss her. I would even fuck the crab out of her. And while she moans my name I will thank God for this miracle around me.
But when I open my eyes again, I realize it is not a dream, it is my worst nightmare.
"This feeling you feel right now, is what you deserve," Katherine says. I feel anger, not just anger, I feel more anger than I ever felt in my entire life. I look up to her. My eyes meet hers. I ball my fists and swear I can see horns on her diabolical head.
"Burn. In. Hell." I tell her. I mean every word, every sound of it. I want nothing more than to kill her in the most painful way. I want her to go straight to hell and burn over and over again. I want her to feel every inch of her skin burn and turn into dust. I want her to see her entire life flashing in front of her eyes. I even want her to see how every single person she ever cared about to die, right in front of her, while she burns. Hell, I will even burn with her, only to make sure she gets everything she deserves.
Katherine just smiles. I swear, if she would know what goes through my head right now, she wouldn't smile. She would run for her life and never ever show her face again.
"Have a happy life, Damon," she just says and disappears. I look up in confusion. Is the wall gone? I try to get through it one more time. My heartbeat quickens. I stand up and run towards Abby. I kneel beside her. Without thinking I bite my wrist open. Drops of blood appear on my arm. With my other hand I lift up her head.
I notice Stefan, Alaric and Jeremy run towards us, but I ignore them and let the drops of blood drip in Abby's mouth. "Damon..." Stefan starts. "Shut up!" I shout. Just now I realize how much I have been crying. "Damon, it is too late," Stefan says. He puts his hand on my shoulder, but I shake it off. "No, it's not!" I tell him.
I have no idea if he is right, but I have to try everything I can to save her.
"No, no, no!" Jeremy shouts, "she can't be dead! Not her!" He stares at her face and cries more than I have ever seen. Alaric walks over to him and puts his hand on his shoulder. Alaric cries too, but he still controls himself.
"Jer..." Alaric starts, but Jeremy pushes his hand away. "Not my sister!" He shouts. "She can't die! No!" He starts to walk around. "Is he having a panic attack?" Stefan asks. "I think so, I will get him outside," Alaric says. He walks over to Jeremy again, says something and walks with him out of the room.
Stefan kneels down beside me. I still hold my bleeding wrist against Abby's mouth. The drops of blood need to go into her system. That is the only way to save her!
"Damon..." Stefan starts. I shake my head. I don't want him to tell me it won't work. I don't want to think about that. I still hold onto that small piece of hope I have left for her.
"Damon, she has a few drops of your blood in her system now. Let's just get her out of here, okay?" He suggests. I sigh and nod. I let her go and look at her. Her eyes stare into the infinity. The beauty is still in them, but there is no life visible. Not yet. I will find a way to bring her back. I will not rest until I am able to hold her in my arms again.
I reach out to her and touch her cheek. It is still soft like it always was, but it's not feeling warm at all. It feels cold and... lifeless...
I move my hand to her eyes and close them. A tear leaves my eye when I touch her hair. It's still soft. I know she put something in it this morning, like she always does. Just a little cream to make it feel soft and make it smell nice.
Stefan kneels down beside me. "Let's bring her home, okay?" He suggests. I nod and want to lift her up, but Stefan stops me. "Just let me," he says.
My first intention is to fight him. I can carry my own girl! But he is right. I can't do that right now. I feel weak and I think I will start to break down the second I hold her lifeless body in my arms.
So, I move over and let Stefan lift her up. He stands up and let Abby lay in his arms. Her arm dangles down, but I grab it and put it on her body. It looks like she just sleeps in his arms. Nothing bad.
Stefan and I walk out of the building. We hear everyone cry and when we arrive back to the car, that is exactly what is going on. When Elena and Jenna see Abby, they jump up, only to cry even more.
"No! Please no!" Jenna cries. Elena falls on her knees and covers her face with her hands. "This isn't happening," she cries. I look over to Stefan. He nods towards Elena. I know he wants to help her, but he is holding my girl. So I just have to help his.
I walk over to Elena and put my hand on her shoulder. "We will find a way to bring her back," I tell her. Elena looks up at me and stands up. She wraps her arms around me and holds me tight. "I can't lose her, Damon," she tells me. "Me neither," I tell her.
Half an hour later, I sit in Abby's room. We put Abby on her bed. It just looks like she is asleep. Except that I don't hear a heartbeat.
I hold her hand with both hands and wait. Everyone else is downstairs trying to explain to Jenna what is going on. Too bad Alaric made her take Vervain every day, so we can't compel her to forget. Jenna doesn't understand a single thing about it and is freaking out.
So I decided to get out of that mess and come back to my own mess. The mess that I still haven't found a way to stop. We immediately called Bonnie on our way here, begging her to find a spell to save Abby. She promised us to do her best, what can only mean there is none.
I know Bonnie well enough to know she is not capable of telling her friend there is no way to save Abby. She rather tells her she will do her best.
I stare at the beautiful girl in front of me. I really hope my blood will save her. I have no idea if it will, but it is the only chance we have.
I hear the front door open. I stay completely silent to hear who just walked in. "Hey..." I hear a familiar voice say, Bonnie. I feel some kind of rush go through my body. I look at Abby and squeeze her hand a little bit.
"I keep my promise," I tell her. I let go of her hand and let my fingers go through her hair. I lean in and kiss her head. "I promise," I tell her and walk out of her room.
I run downstairs and see Bonnie in the living room. Everybody looks up when I walk in. "What did you find?" I ask Bonnie. Bonnie looks at me and sighs. She looks around the room and looks down at her hands.
"There is no spell to bring her back, I'm sorry," Bonnie says. I hear Jenna, Jeremy and Elena burst into tears all over again, but I try to hold it all in. "Are you sure?" I ask her. Bonnie turns around to me and nods. "There is no way I can bring her back," she says. I can see in her eyes she really tried to find a spell. I bet she even cried when she realised there was none.
"There is still hope," I tell everyone, "I gave Abby my blood. It will get in her system and bring her back." Stefan puts his hand on my shoulder. "Damon..." he starts. "No! It will save her! I am not letting her go that easily," I tell him.
Stefan sighs and looks down. "What is it, Stef?" Alaric asks. Stefan hesitates, "I don't want to ruin your hope... But Damon's plan won't work." Everybody gasps. It was the only piece of hope left.
"Why are you saying that? You don't know that!" I tell him. Stefan sighs again, "I do know that. I tried it myself..." he says. Everybody stares at him, waiting him to explain.
"A few years ago, I tried to save someone like that either. After her neck was broken, I gave her my blood, but she never came back. They need to have the blood in their system the second they die," he explains.
I feel tears, anger, sadness and fire burning inside of me. I don't wanna lose Abby. I can't lose her! She is all I have! She is everything I live for. I can't go on with my life without her. I wanted to show her the world. I wanted her to live her life until the moment she wanted me to turn her so we could live forever.
This doesn't end here and now. This can't be it! She barely lived! There is so much in life she didn't get to do. So much we didn't get to do...
My veins feel like fire inside of my body. I ball my fists and my sight is getting red. "NO!" I scream. I turn around and kick the coffee table as hard as I can. I feel a rush taking over my body. I kick the table again and slam my hand through it. It feels good. I really needed to fight something.
I kick it a few times again and lift it up only to throw it against the wall. Everybody scares, but nobody says anything. They all know there is no way to stop me, even if they wanted to.
I slam my fist through the wall. The wall cracks and a hole appears. I start to get out of breath. I stop and stare into the wall. I breathe in and out as deep as I can to calm myself. This really helped. I really needed to get that rage out of my system.
"Let's all take a moment and then say goodbye to her, okay?" Alaric says. Just his words make everyone cry even more. Without saying another word, I run upstairs. I don't want to give in just now. There must be a way to save her! I will not give up until I found it!
I run into her room and lock the door behind me. I walk over to her and look at her. Every single piece of anger settles down when I see her face. It looks so peaceful.
Then it finally hits me. There is no way I can save her. Stefan is right, she had to have my blood in her system the second she died. That is the only way.
Why didn't I just give her my blood when she was in the hospital? Right, because we thought it would make it worse. I can't believe I believed that cancer-story. I had to find out it wasn't true! But every doctor I compelled to tell me, told me the same story...
I stare at my girl. More and more tears roll down my cheeks. I broke my promise... I promised her we would always be together. I promised her I would always save her... But I didn't.
When I gave her my word, I never thought this is where we would end. I thought I would really keep my promise. I thought there was nothing I wouldn't be able to save her from. I never thought Katherine would be the one to ruin it all. Katherine... the devil herself...
I grab Abby's hand again. "I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise," I tell her. I don't know if she can hear me, but I need to tell her these things. She deserves to hear them.
"I tried everything, but I just couldn't... I couldn't..." I start to cry. Tears roll down my cheek like someone didn't close the damn tap.
"I tried, Abby, I really tried," I cry, "I am so sorry!" I cover my face in my hands, but my hands get wet within a minute. I don't think I have ever cried this much in my life.
"I love you so much," I tell her, "I promise you, we will be together again. I will do good things from now on, so I will go to heaven with you." I start to laugh, "not that I will ever be able to make up for all the bad things I've done." Why do I start to laugh in such a horrible moment?
"But I will do my best, for you," I promise her. I bring her hand to my lips and kiss it. I can't believe I am actually saying goodbye to her, but I have no choice. I can't save her.
"I love you, Abby," I tell her, "I have never loved another person this much ever before. And I never will ever again." I stare at her face for one last time. I stand up and put my hand on her head. I lean in and press my lips against her forehead.
"I hope you find peace," I tell her, but then I grin through my tears. "Actually, no. I hope you won't. I hope you will stay around and be with us here on earth. I hope you will be around us, like you're still here with us."
I put one last kiss on her head and let go of her. I walk away and walk to the door of her room. I put my hand on the door handle and sigh. I know I will never come back to this room again. It will be way to hard to be here without her.
When I unlock the door, I hear something, a soft sound, like someone just knocked on the door, just once. I open the door, but then I hear it again. But this time it isn't just one knock. It's two... three... four. What is that sound?
Then my heartbeat stops. My head gets dizzy and my jaw drops. I turn around, full hope. But Abby just lays there, still as lifeless as ever. But then I hear the knocks again. They start to form a beat...
I run back to Abby. I try to stay calm while my head and heart go crazy like they just hopped in a rollercoaster.
The beat gets louder and louder. It almost sounds like a normal heartbeat. I put my hand on hers and hold it, waiting for something to happen.
I want to jump through the ceiling when I feel a small squeeze in my hand. My heart beats quicker and with hope I stare at her face.
Two eyes open slowly and blink a few times. I feel like I could scream and jump off a building out of happiness. My heart beats like it is going to jump out of my body.
Her beautiful brown eyes find mine and I see how she needs to process everything. "D... Damon?" She asks, worried she is just imagining it. "Abby?" My voice cracks and I feel tears burning behind my eyes.
Abby grabs my hand and I see how she realizes what is going on. "Damon!" She says. Tears roll down her cheeks. "Abby!" I shout. More and more tears roll down my cheek as I let it sink in.
Abby is here! She made it. She survived. I don't give a crap how she did it. My girl is back! That is all that matters.
I lean in and wrap my arms around her. I hug her as tight as I possibly can. She seems to feel the same and holds me tighter than ever.
I feel my heart almost pounding out of my chest. I lean back and stare into her beautiful eyes. I want to tell her how much I have missed her. Instead, I put both my hands on her cheeks and press my lips on hers. I feel the excitement and fireworks explode in my body.
I never thought I would feel this ever again, her arms around me. I thought it was all over. I thought she would never come back to me ever again. But not this girl. Not my girl.
Because my girl is back! And I will make sure she will never ever leave me again.