i love you billie eilish
Sebastian
Gus and Adam eventually came out. Adam was sobbing, so Gus took him for a walk after giving me a sorrowful look. I sighed and Denessy stared at me with red eyes I went in.
The sight when I walked in broke my heart. I could feel my lungs start to cave in. Luna's face lost its colour, all of it. It was pale as snow. Her eyes were shut, her lips were cracked, dry and bleeding. Her body covered in dark bruises. She had numerous tubes connecting to various parts of her body, and I felt myself break down.
Tears spilled from my eyes as I dropped to the ground, my heart-wrenching at the sight of my best friend laying lifelessly on the hospital bed.
"Sebastian?" A soft voice croaked through the room.
I quickly wiped the tears away and stood up to meet Luna's gaze. Her green eyes hadn't lost their colour yet. They were still as vibrant and alive as ever. Beautiful.
"It's okay. I'm here Luna." I walked to her and pulled a chair up beside her bed. Luna held my hand and pulled it closer.
"Lay with me."
I hesitated.
"You're not going to hurt me. I'm not a porcelain doll, she grinned. I carefully maneuvered myself onto Luna's hospital bed and she laid her head on my chest.
She looked so weak, so frail. She was cold as ice, and I pulled the blanket up over her shoulders.
"Sebastian, promise me when I'm gone, you'll still stay the strong, brave, wonderful, adventurous boy that you are. That you'll never lose your love of the stars or of simple things. Promise me you won't cry. Promise me that you won't shut everyone out. Promise me."
I cried again. "I promise."
"I had a really great time with you. You will always be my best friend."
"And you were mine," I said, sobbing into her shoulder. She rubbed my back and I felt her warm tears on my cheek. I kept telling myself that she was going to make it through this, that she would be okay. But Luna knows her body better than anyone else, and she was saying her goodbyes.
"I love you," she said.
My lips pursed together as I held my tears at bay. "I love you, too."
"I'm in pain."
"I know." I kissed her forehead and she snuggled closer to me, even though it was hurting her.
Luna began violently coughing and I got up and grabbed a bucket. Blood splattered across the floor and when she was handed the bucket she threw up profusely. I pulled her hair up and rubbed her back. She groaned in pain.
When she was done I took it away and helped her drink her water and she laid back down.
"I'm sorry, that was so gross."
"You don't need to be sorry, my love." I set down her glass of water and sat back down. She stared at the ceiling in agony. It was clear as day how much pain she was in. I could almost feel her pain. It was radiating from her and tightening around me. Her eyes were glossy red and losing their shine.
I watched as she breathed in deeply and shut her eyes. Silence filled the room. I let my eyes wander around. The many bouquets of roses and lilies. The sad, red balloon in the corner. The ring of a tea stain on the bedside table. The fingerprint of a smiley face on the window. My journal tucked under her pillow.
"Tell me a story," she said quietly, her voice raspy. She could barely even croak out a few words.
"Which one?" I asked, my mind becoming foggy.
"The one that your grampa told you. The one that made you feel better. Maybe it'll make me feel better." She said, finding it hard to breathe. Her breaths were shallow.
"Um," I swallowed a lump in my throat painfully and stood up, walking towards the window. The sun shone on my face and I smiled. It was breaking my heart to look at her, and I knew if I tried to tell her the story while looking into her eyes, I would fail.
"So, one time there was this lake. I used to go on it with my brother, canoeing, and fishing." I laughed bitterly, the tears threatening to fall. My eyes burned but I kept the tears back, rubbing my chin.
"And one day, this big flock of ducks came and landed on the lake. The temperature dropped all of a sudden, and it all froze right there."
I swallowed again, and tightly closed my eyes. For some reason, the story I had known word for word had become impossible to remember, but I kept going anyways. My heart was beating in my ears.
"The ducks flew away and took the lake with them. Now they say it's somewhere in Canada." I chuckled through the tears. I blinked again after Luna hadn't said anything, I turned around slowly.
Her eyes were closed, her features relaxed. I walked over quickly and took her hand in mine, shaking it gently. It was cold.
"Luna?" My voice broke. I could feel my heartbeat quickening by the second. It felt like it would beat out of my chest. I rubbed the back of her hand on my cheek.
She didn't answer. I sat quietly, trying to see if I could hear her shallow breaths.
I couldn't.
"Luna," I shook her hand again, the hot, salty tears spilling down my cheeks, "don't go anywhere I can't follow."
When she didn't answer, my shaky hand moved to her face and outlined her features for one last time. I pictured her green eyes staring back at me, her gorgeous green eyes.
When it suddenly hit me that I would never again look into her eyes, a wave of anger flooded through me. I collapsed against Luna and sobbed violently into her shoulder.
It was loud. It was ugly. It was heart-wrenching. I screamed into the sheets and cried against her chest and hoped that if I cried enough and screamed enough that she would come back and tell me to be quiet.
She didn't.
I stood up and placed one last kiss on her forehead. I let my lips linger there, and finally whispered, "You were my everything."
The doctors came in soon after, checking to make sure. And she was.
She was gone.
Denessy didn't believe them when they told her. She came in the room with a smile on her face, but upon seeing Luna's purple lips and lifeless body, she fell to the floor, screaming and clutching her chest. She clawed furiously at Luna's chest, telling her to wake up.
Will came in to pull her off, fighting with her to rip her away.
And all I could do is stand and stare. My feet couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. We all tried to tell ourselves this was a sick joke she was playing, but it wasn't. Luna was never that cruel. She had no choice but to leave us.
Luna was gone.