Allie's P.O.V
Three weeks.
It's been three weeks since I have been in L.A. It's been three weeks since Carli hit me in her stupid Mustang. It's been two weeks since my song was dropped and it climbed the charts like nobody's business. And it's been one week since I left the hospital.
I don't have any major injuries, thank you God for that one. Calum is trying ot get along with me, and I might just forgive him. Evenually. Only one thing, I will never forget what he put me through.
Since I am in good enough shape, the boys and the manager's want us to go in a and record a little bit today. I have a few songs ready, I just have to ask the boys which one I should do. A few of them are about Ashton. Some about Calum. Others about whatever I was feeling like the day i wrote them.
"Allie? Are you ready to go in?" Luke came into my room in the 5SOS house. Which is mighty big may I add. I nodded since I was already dressed, and so was Lucas. Ashton got him ready for me this morning.
I grabbed my phone and my wallet before I walke dout of my room and closed the door. I walked down stairs and saw Ashton holding Lucas, with a bottle in his mouth.
"That's a cute father son moment." I said causing Ashton to look up from the baby in his arms. He smiled at me and stood up. He walked over to me and gave me a quick kiss, and we all headed out yo our van.
The drive to the studio and see a few fans there. We sign things and take pictures, a few girls gave me some onsies and stuff for Lucas, which was really sweet of them. I got a few twitter names that I am supposed to follow at some point tonight. I promised I would.
"So boys, do you wanna start first?" Some one who works for the recording studio asked. Luke and Calum nodded, since the sing the most they went in and did what they had to do first, which left me with Mikey and Ashton.
"Allie, do you know what song you're gonna record today?" Mikey asked me. I shrugged and pulled a few out of a bag under Lucas's stroller thingy. I handed them to Mikey.
"I want you guys to help me choose which one to do. Can you do that?" I asked him. He smiled and nodded at me. He read through all the songs and once he chose the one he liked he handed the paper's to Ashton, Luke had came out right after Ashton chose his song so he passed them to Luke.
"I think you should do this one." Luke said handing me one of the songs.
"That's the one I said to." Ashton said really loud. I laughed at him, he's so loud all the time. But it's cute.
"I was the first one to say that! I should be praised for it." Mikey said. I laughed at him to before going over and giving him a hug.
"I know Mikey." I said giving him a kiss on the cheek. Just after they decided my song, Calum came out.
"Ash, Mikey. They need you now." Calum said. Mikey and Ashton stood up and went into the booth, leaving me with my brother and Calum.
Calum keeps starting at me, and is making me kinda uncomfortable. It's only uncomfortable for me because I know he has something to say but he just won't. Everytime I look up he is already looking at me.
"Cal, if you something to say to her then fucking say it." Luke snapped. Calum jumped at his sudden outburst. I guess Luke saw him looking at me too.
"If I knew how to say it, I would Luke. And you that!" Calum yelled back.
"What is it you don't understand how to say? It isn't that hard to apologize to someone." Luke yelled back. He tried to stand up, but i pulled him back down.
I can't believe I am ruining their friendships the way I am. They were so close until I came back into their lives. Until Luke found out he was my brother. Until Cal cheated on me. Until I started dating Ashton again, and he found out Lucas was actually his son, and not Calum's.
"Excuse me for a second guys." I said. I didn't even grab my son, I just walked out of the recording studio. I stayed in the building, but I went out into the hallway. I slid my back down the wall and started crying. I hid my face in my knees and sobbed for what seemed like hours.
"Miss, are you okay?" I heard a voice say. I looked up and saw faces I knew all to well. Keaton Stromberg and Wesley Stromberg from Emblem Three!
"Not really, but I won't bother you with my problems." I said back. Keaton and Wesley sat down on the floor across the hall from me.
"We really don't mind. You can tell us." Wesley said.
"Okay, well..my boyfriends band is in there recording a song." I said. Keaton nodded.
"One of his bandmates is my ex-boyfriend and one of his band mates is my brother. But, I got pregnent a year ago and left them without tell any of them except the one who is my ex-boyfriend. He was my best friend at the time, we started dating right before I had my son." I explained.
"Why'd you leave?" Keaton asked.
"Well, the father of the child, who is my boyfriend again, cheated on me. I walked in on him and some chick named Carli, I was going over to tell him the news" I explained again.
"If he cheated on you why did you go back to him?" Wesley asked me, but before I could explain anymore, the third member of E3 Dre Chadwick walked over and sat next them.
"Who's this Wes?" Drew asked.
"Well, we didn't ask her name yet, but we saw her sitting here crying so she's telling us why she was." Wesley said. Drew nodded and they all turned their attention back to me.
"Okay, so the boy who I was dating when I had my son, he ended up cheating on me with the same girl my boyfriend now cheated on me with. He also cheated on me with my bestfriend right infront of me at my eighteenth birthday party. I may have threw my heels at him. And slapped him in the face, but he deserved it." I said. All the boys made disgusted faces before I continued.
"Ever since that day, the four boys are constanly fighting. I tore their friendship apart by coming back." I said. I left out the part of Carli going crazy and running me over.
"Well, did the ex-boyfriend ever apologize to you?" Drew asked. I shook my head.
"All he ever does is stare at me like he wants to. My brother yelled at him a few minutes ago for it. He told him if he had something to say he should just say it." I explained. The three boys nodded and stood up. Keaton grabbed my hands and helpped me off of the ground.
"Well, maybe you should acknowledge him first. It could help him think of what to say to you." Wesely said. I nodded my head, just then Ashton walked out of the recording studio they were using.
"Alissandra? Babe, it's your turn to record your track. Are you alright?" Ashton said walking over to me. He looked over at Wesley, Drew and Keaton.
"Jesus, you were talking to Emblem 3 and you didn't come tell me?" Ashton asked me. I shrugged my shoulders. Ashton turned and shook all theyu boys hands and pulled me into his body.
"Alissandra was just telling us about what she's been going through. We were walking past and we saw her sitting here crying. We just wanted to make sure she was okay." Wesley explainedd. Keaton and Drew nodded in agreement with what Wes just said.
"Well I appreciate you guys helping her out. SHe's had a rough last few months hasn't she?" Ashton asked. The boys nodded.
"Well, we have to go but if you ever need us, andy of you just give us a call yeah?" Keaton asked. Ash and I nodded and we got all three of their numbers. We gave them ours and said good-bye before we went back in so I could record.
"Allie are you ready to go?" Luke asked me. I nodded and headed into the booth.
My track started to play and I just went and did what I had to do.
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,
Not a footprint to be seen.
A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen.
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside.
Couldn't keep it in, Heaven knows I tried.
Don't let them in, don't let them see,
Be the good girl you always have to be.
Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.
Well, now they know.
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand and here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway
It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all.
Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe.
I know I left a life behind but I'm too relieved to grieve.
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand, and here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway
Standing frozen
In the life I've chosen.
You won't find me.
The past is all behind me
Buried in the snow.
Let it go, let it go
Can't hold it back anymore
Let it go, let it go
Turn my back and slam the door
And here I stand, and here I'll stay
Let it go, let it go
The cold never bothered me anyway, yeah, whoa
(Na na, na na, na na na na) [4x]
Let it go yeah
Na, na.
Here I stand.
Let it go, let it go, oh
Let it go.
That song basically meant that through out these past few weeks I have felt like I have isolated and shut everyone out. It show's how much I have changed as a person since everything happened. Everything that has happened to me to make me this way, well, the past is in the past.
I think I know why all the boys chose this song. The message behind it relates to what me and Calum are going through. He needs to apologize for what he did, but what he doen't realize is that I have put the past behind me. I am just waiting to see if he can to.
"I believe you have something to say?" was all I heard come out of Luke's mouth as soon as I walked out of the booth. He was looking at Calum, who looked very nervous.
"Allie, I don't really know how to say sorry for everything that I have done to you in the past. I don't know what to say about what Carli did to you three weeks ago, I just want you to know I didn't tell her to do that. I wish I could undo the hurt, I'm so super sorry it isn't even funny." Calum said to me.
"It's fine Cal. Honestly." I said, but I think they could tell by my voice he did say one thing he should have.
"I'm sorry I betrayed you. I cheated on you on your birthday. That was just a huge fucking dick move. What I realized in these past few weeks, is that you have two older brother's watching out for you, and an amazing boyfriend who treats you better then I ever could. They would never hurt you the way I have." Calum continued.
'The funny thing about betrayal Cal, is that it never comes from your enimies. Only friends." I said. I think that confussed him a little bit.
"I forgive you Cal, but I don't trust you fully." I said.
"You do?" Calum asked me. I nodded.
"Yes, and that's why I talked to our record producer while I was in there, and he said I can do two colaborations. One with you, and one with the whole band." I said with a smile on my face. All the boys cheered and jumped around.
My album, is going to be pretty kickass.