On Friday morning I woke up from a not-so-peaceful sleep. Yet again my dreams were filled with vicious demons of the past, come to haunt me. I sat up shivering, wishing beyond all that I could go running but it was simply out of the question. My chest was in extreme pain I couldn't possibly.
My alarm beeped mercilessly, drilling through my head. I groaned routinely as I rolled over, turning my phone off. Slowly I sat up. The pain began seeping in to my body again, working its way up through my spine, weaving itself into my muscles; a constant reminder of the life I was living.
My vision clouded as tears pricked my eyes from the growing hurt in my body. Weak. That's all you are. Weak. You can't even defend yourself. Even Louis knows it.
Louis! Yesterday was a plot twist. I had no idea what was going on with him, with us. He beat me up one day but held my hand the next? What was wrong with him?
I grumbled as I got out of bed and fetched some random clothing. I limped to the bathroom and almost whimpered at the ache in my ribs. The pills in the cupboard seemed so inviting but then again, so did the weed...
I shook off the thoughts before I could succumb to them. Instead I took two panadol before heading to the kitchen.
"Morning baby bro," Gemma said, pouring two cups of coffee.
I yawned and went to the fridge, drinking orange juice from the carton. "Hey."
"Stop doing that," she scolded with a frown on her face. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and made a disgusting slurping noise. "You're gross." She said sitting at the table and setting down the two mugs.
"Thanks," I replied cheerily as I buttered a pancake. "Mum not back yet?" I asked in a serious tone.
"No." She sighed. "And um, dad wants to...uh he wants to see me." I nodded. "So I'm gonna be gone for a week."
I raised an eyebrow at that. "A week?" I questioned. She nodded abashed. "Yes, I phoned him and told him you knew. I thought maybe he'd reach out to you, like he did with us. But he said since you knew that we didn't have to sneak around anymore. He told me he's taking me and mom away for a spa week. I tried to object but he said he'd take away my funding for college. I've gotta go, I'm sorry."
I swallowed a lump, pretending I wasn't phased by hearing this. "Whatever, it's not like I care. Free house for a week." I forced a smile. I pulled out my phone and looked at the time. "Shit, I gotta go. I'll see ya when I come back?"
She swallowed noisily and shook her head. "Actually no. I'm leaving at 2."
A grimace spread through my features. "Ok. I'll call you. Bye."
"Love you!" She shouted as the door and I raced to my car as the rain battered the windshield.
A choked sob came from my throat as the first hot tear trickled down my cheek. Shaking hands tugged at my curls. I felt trapped. And alone.
The loud ringing of my phone dragged me from my self sorrow slumps and served as a reminder that I needed to be strong.
"Hello, Harry mate. My car broke down, you wouldn't be able to pick me up would ya?"
"Sure, Nialler. Where are you?" I requested as I harshly wiped away the last of my tears. When the call ended, I shook myself in an attempt to shake all fears from me. My father left me. I don't need him, the asshole.
The engine roared to life as I pressed on the pedal and the car flew forward. I was racing against the wind. I loved speed. It made me feel free.
Niall was waiting by the road a few blocks away from school. He smiled when I pulled up beside him and joined me in my car. As soon as his seat belt was in place, we went flying again. The windows were down and the wind on my face made me feel alive.
"Do you always drive like that to school?" Niall smirked whilst fixing his now frizzed hair in the small car mirror.
I shrugged. "Don't like it, don't call me." I said stepping out into the rain. Niall laughed and ran with me up the steps. As we entered the crowded halls, people were laughing and chattering as usual.
Niall and I spilt to go out lockers and agreed to meet in home room. I was just closing my locker when my body was knocked forward and my head bashed against the hard metal of the locker. A fist collided with my stomach and I keeled over falling to my hands and knees.
I looked up from the floor gasping for air when I saw Ethan and James giggling at the sight of me. "Jesus Christ can't you fucking mature up! He's been through enough." A deep voice roared.
Warm arms grabbed my biceps but I flinched away from the contact and fell against the lockers gasping for breath. The laughter surrounding me increased. The arms tried again to pull me up again more strongly this time and thy succeeded.
Once in an upright standing position, the strong arms guided me down a deserted hallway were I leaned against the cold wall to catch my breath.
"Why?" I question not looking at the figure standing before me.
"Because Louis likes you. And whatever problem I've got with you, I can let go for the sake of him. He's my best mate." Zayn said scratching his neck with his unbandaged hand.
Anger shot through me. "I can fight my own battles, thanks." I seethed as I pushed past him and marched off to home room.
When I arrived, chatter was filling the room and two pairs of blue eyes snapped up to see me. Both flooded with relief to see me. I didn't know how I felt about that.
Louis watched as I made my way through the crowd to Niall who smiled as I sat.
"I stopped by your locker but you weren't there. I got worried." He said, relief laced into his voice.
"Yeah, I had to detour." I mumbled. The bell rang and I called goodbye to Niall as I rushed off to my irate class.
The morning passed smoothly, with few run-ins with people like James and Ethan, a lot of weird glances from Louis and a few 'hellos' from Niall as we passed in the hallway.
During lunch, Niall and I decided to sit out in the courtyard to try soak up as much sunlight as we could before being bustled back into the school building for afternoon lessons.
The afternoon dragged, however, Niall and I bantered our way through the lessons; getting called out twice in biology. When the last bell of the day rang, a sigh escaped my lips as relief flooded through my veins. Made it. I made it through my first week. A small smile tugged at my lips whilst walking through the halls to my locker.
Once I finished up and waved goodbye to Niall with a promise to call him when I got home, I began to walk out of school.
Louis soon caught up with me. "Hey," he smiled. Anger ignited in me.
"I don't need you to fight my battles!" I hissed, hugging my books to my chest.
Confusion flashed through his eyes. "What? What are you talking abo-"
"I can handle people myself." I huffed, before turning and leaving a baffled Louis behind me. I hopped in my car and sped off home.
I arrived home, only to realise I didn't want to be there. It was pouring rain but I don't care. I drove slowly to the town park, grabbed an umbrella from the backseat and went and sat on the bench by the pond.
I watched the raindrops collide with the water and tried counting the times the rain was the fists of my tormentors and the water was my body. I lost count.
I remember the first day I went back to school after that night.
*flashback*
I walked slowly up the steep steps to the grey building before me. When I entered the halls, that were usually filled with non stop chatter and giggling; they were eerily quiet as people stared at me. I heard some harsh sniggering as I made my way to my locker. Whispers followed me.
I looked horrid. I knew I did. Blue and purple invaded my face. I walked funny with a limp and with even step my face twisted into an expression of pain due to several injuries to my ribs.
"It's not rape if he's gay!" Someone called out in the halls. I had come out just a year previous, at the age of 15. Not at 16, I was a rape victim. The thought made me go cold. I didn't want to cry anymore. Crying was weak. And being weak meant I was vulnerable, which made me easy to attack. I would no longer be attacked. I will no longer be weak.
"Why're you complaining, gay boy? You like it up the ass!" Another shouted and this comment was followed by many laughs. I knew; I was shunned. Seen as an outcast.
Time passed quickly but the rain never eased. It 5:54pm when I got back into my car, drenched to the skin. The radio hummed softly as I drove home.
I returned home for the second time this evening, only this time soaking wet. Upon entering what would no we my 'man pad' for the next week, I shook my curls, shrugged out of my jacket and separated my feet from my boots.
A creak in the floorboard made me look up. My jaw somewhat slackened and my muscles tensed. What the fuck?
Update goals: 30 votes