- EDEN -
I've been living in my house for almost a week now, and I honestly don't ever remember feeling more at home, even if I am still effectively living like a runaway adolescent while I get it all sorted.
Luna and Wolfe ended up gifting me their spare bed as a house warming present considering they needed to get rid of it anyway to make room for the crib and change table Wolfe and Mason made for the baby, and refused to accept the money I tried to offer them for it. I ended up just buying them a voucher to one of the nicest restaurants in town when they repeatedly gave me back the cash I tried to leave at their place multiple times, so they had no choice but to use it or it would go to waste. I thought it was genius.
As did I find my ingenuity when I watched various YouTube tutorials about how to spruce up linoleum flooring with paint and vinyl 'floorboard' tiles. I managed to get rid of the black and white checks by first covering it with black paint which dried in no time considering the heat, and then painstakingly laying chestnut brown wood-effect vinyl stickers. It was so simple to do, and much cheaper than ripping the original linoleum and starting fresh.
I had also completed the process of patching up, sanding, and re-staining the kitchen cupboard doors to match the colour of the floors. I even went all out and removed the door and drawer handles, and replaced them with fancy new gold handles instead.
And, while I was on a roll with the painting, I chose to also patch up the walls and repaint the kitchen and living area a gorgeous, bold, forest green colour. When I showed Graham and Penny the colour swatches I was considering, they liked the deep, rich green the most, and had a giggle about how I was transforming the unit into my own little indoor Garden of Eden.
Between the brown floors and the green walls, I can definitely see where they're coming from. I can only imagine how much more it will make them chuckle when I start bringing some actual indoor plants into the mix too.
Next up was patching up the walls and painting both bedrooms in a neutral off-white with a burgundy-plum coloured feature wall, and the bathroom a deep ocean blue. The colours would admittedly be quite dark in every room, but I don’t think it will feel dark when I finish it all considering how much natural light there is all through the house. I think I’ll even try to figure out how to regrout the tiles in the bathroom, kitchen and laundry, which had all been updated in the last couple years so didn't actually need to be replaced, just spruced up, which I think I’ll use black grout to tie the light tiles and darker walls together nicely.
My friends, who had all taken some leave from work between Christmas and New Years, were a massive help, as was expected considering how kind and generous they naturally are, and how much they want to make this transition back home for me as seamless and successful as possible. Between Luna being an absolute doll and sewing me some new curtains using the fabric I purchased, Wolfe and Mason lending me both their tools from work and their large cars and larger muscles to go pick up the extra furniture and appliances I'd purchased online, and Nella helping me find all the homeware bargains in her favourite stores in town, everything was coming together much quicker than I expected.
I'd eaten into my savings a bit to pay for everything, feeling uncomfortable taking Graham and Penny's money, but they too found ways around that like I had with Luna's spare bed, contacting their bank to reverse the payment of my rent and bond that I'd paid to them when I moved in to cover some of the costs of the paint and flooring, and said they'd refuse the next month too considering they did a walk-through of the unit on New Years Eve and were blown away by the changes I'd made.
My body was exhausted from all the manual labour in the past week to get my house comfortably liveable and feeling like my own. I refused my friends' help to actually do most of the upgrades, wanting the pride in being able to say I did it all on my own without much help from anyone. I will say though, I have an altogether new respect for Wolfe and Mason who do this kind of physical work day in, day out. Of course, their bodies are conditioned to it and they probably feel it half as much as mine right now, which only typically works out the muscles in my fingers and hands when I'm cutting hair all day.
I can barely move, and I'm immensely grateful that when Graham and Penny upgraded the bathroom last, they put in the deepest, standalone bath they could find, because I feel like my late nightly Epsom salt soaks are the only reason why I wake up with any energy to start over again.
I put it out there to everyone that I was happy to host our quiet New Years Eve gathering now that everything was pretty much done, but I think they all took pity on me and how hard I've been working this week to get the house sorted that they simply refused, and we were instead gathered at Luna and Wolfe's just up the road. Hades and I walked there instead of driving as I planned to have a few drinks to unwind from my exhausting week, and I wasn't about to leave the poor guy at home knowing firstly, how much he adores Medusa, and secondly, how frightening it might be for him to be home alone when the fireworks go off later tonight.
I was glad when we arrived at their house to find it was only our core circle of friends that were coming. I didn't know whether anyone else had been invited, but was relieved to know I wasn't going to have to make an extra effort to be social with other people tonight. I'm so tired from all the work I've been doing that I'll be surprised if I even make it to midnight.
"The house is looking amazing, Eden," Mason said, passing me my first cider of the evening. "You've done such a good job, and in such a short amount of time too. If ever you want to change up your career, I'd employ you in a heartbeat. You're a lot more capable and hard working than half the apprentices I have at the moment."
"Hear hear," said Wolfe, tipping his own beer up in salute to me. "When you're ready to trade your comb and scissors for a trowel and cement, you let me know."
Luna was sitting beside him drinking the non-alcoholic wine she'd found to replace her uncle's home brew during her pregnancy, with Wolfe's arm wrapped around her growing belly and his hand resting there gently, hoping to feel his baby move. He does this a lot, I've noticed. His excited anticipation of being a father is overwhelmingly sweet. It reminds me of my own father, and how much he loved being a dad to Elodie and I.
I still haven't spoken to her since my grandfather's birthday, if you could even call that particular interaction speaking. Our shared presence around each other when I made an appearance at our mother's for Christmas was unacknowledged, despite my verbally wishing her a Merry Christmas when I got there. I really don't think that's going to change any time soon, and I've accepted that. It's obviously not how I expected my relationship with my own sister to turn out, but I'm not going to compromise my own happiness for her or anyone else anymore. They'll just either have to come around to my decision to end my relationship with Trey, or accept the reality that I will simply refuse any relationship with them.
It's a liberating feeling, reaching a point where you respect yourself enough to understand what's good for you and not, and having the courage to stand by your own convictions. I don't know what changed in me to be able to finally do this and not feel guilty for it, but I'll take it and won't complain. I'm now living as my authentic self, and perhaps not unsurprisingly, everything else is falling into place too.
"Now, now, you two," Nella said while getting up to clear our dishes, despite Luna's protests. "Don't you be getting any ideas of stealing our newest employee. Luna and I have been waiting years to get Eden back and to work alongside her again. Just because she is multi-skilled, doesn't mean you can try to poach her away."
Mason, getting up to help Nella clean away the remnants of our barbecue not already eaten by Hades or Medusa, wasn't giving up without a fight it would seem. "But what if Eden would prefer to work with Wolfe or I?" he winked over at me. "What if, like a new move, she's interested in a new career too? We pay pretty well, and there's always laughs to be had. She'd get a decent workout every day so could save some money by not needing a gym membership, unless she wanted one of course."
"Actually, Edes," piped in Wolfe. "You'd love my gym. Lune refuses to come work out with me considering she does about fifty hours of yoga every week at home or on the beach, but you don't..."
"Isn't it enough for you that we now run together?" I argued, not overly keen on the idea of becoming any more of a cliché than I already am---thirties, newly single, relocated to a new state, adopted animal companion, new home, DIY upgrades like I'm a budding contestant on The Block. Adding in getting into shape by joining a gym, and I'm every other single woman in her thirties clinging to what's left of their youth and forcing healthier lifestyle changes and habits after a significant breakup. "I don't even want to be doing that."
I really don't. It started when I was living with Nella and Mason after moving home as his way of keeping an eye on how I was going and helping me with Hades. Running before either of us needed to go to work, which meant that I could have murdered him, as do I still want to stab him in the thighs every time I see him walking up to my door with his runners on and not his work boots that he usually wears.
"You'll grow to love it, trust me," Wolfe said with complete conviction, though I highly doubt it. The number of times I've gone running over the past decade or so prior to the last few weeks could be counted on one hand, maybe two; and the number of times I've enjoyed it even less. Chuck me out in a forest or on a mountain though and I'll happily walk for hours. I'm all about endurance, not speed.
"Better you than me, Edes," Luna said, shifting in her seat uncomfortably. "Simply walking is getting interesting these days, let alone even the idea of running."
But for all her complaints about the downsides of pregnancy, I've never seen my friend happier. She's going to be a great mother, and I can't wait to meet her baby.
We continued to chat into the evening, sitting outside on the back deck with a few drinks and a lot of laughs, but I was tired and pretty desperate to sleep, opting to leave a little early to get home before all the midnight fireworks started. No one even bothered trying to convince me to stay for the countdown, which I'm putting down to my exhausted physical appearance at this stage of my impromptu home reno journey.
I wished my friends a happy new year and dragged Hades away from Medusa long enough to get his lead clipped onto his collar, and started walking home. It was the perfect temperature for a late night walk, not too hot and not too cold, and apparently I wasn't the only one who had the same idea.
There was a group of people, roughly my age by the looks of them in the distance, walking towards me in the direction of the beach. In the past, before I moved to Melbourne, there was usually a display of fireworks put on by some of the wealthier locals from their yachts, which always looked stunning reflecting on the water by the beach, so I made the assumption that that was where they were headed at this hour. Luna, Nella and I used to do the same thing when we were younger, and it was always a pretty magical sight to welcome in the new year.
I'm actually tempted now to turn around and walk in the same direction back to the water to witness it myself. But without knowing for certain how Hades would react to the booming bangs and fizzles of the fireworks, I don't think I can risk it. The last thing I need right now when I'm already half asleep is a terrified Hades wanting to bolt and run anxiously through the masses of people I expect to be down on the beach right now.
Despite being almost completely depleted and absolutely on my last legs---quite literally as I drag my tired ass home on foot---the closer this group of jubilant friends travelled towards me, the more I wanted to share in their delight. To know them. Who they were, how and what they knew about one another, what their hopes for the next year ahead might be for themselves and their friendships with each other.
It’s an odd feeling, even more so as we meet on the footpath and they greeted me with kind and generous well wishes for my own year, asked if they can pat Hades, and slowly continued on their way to what I’m presuming is the beach. At the end of the group of strangers is one that is actually becoming more familiar by the day considering I see him walking his dog while reading so often that I swear sometimes he must know where I live and be watching and waiting to see when Hades and I leave to follow us. I’d say he’s too handsome to give off creepy stalker vibes, but I’ve seen enough true crime documentaries to know that doesn’t mean shit.
He slowed when he saw me, and stopped responding to the woman walking beside him who he had previously been speaking to, the same beautiful redhead from the beach on Christmas if I'm not mistaken, who was looking none too pleased. Part of his pause must also have been connected to his dog greeting mine in a display of shameless ass sniffing, after which he kneeled down himself to greet Hades, albeit in a less intrusive way involving pats instead of exchanging butt scents.
“Happy New Year,” he said, looking up at me with a smile, and I’m grateful it’s already dark because I imagine my cheeks would be a hideously embarrassing shade of nervous pink right now.
I believe I choked out a “You too,” or at least I tried to. I can’t quite recall given I was lost completely in his dark green eyes, and perhaps even more so his shirtlessness up close. His wardrobe must be rather sparse for how lacking he regularly seems to be for a material covering of his abs. Not that I'm complaining.
He chuckled as he stood and called his dog to “Come,” and I regretted my awkward response only for a second until I saw him turn back around to smile at me again as he was coaxed into walking away with the redhead's arm looping through his.
I'm honestly not one to make new year's resolutions. I generally find them either absurd, unrealistic, meaningless, and/or otherwise totally unachievable, and I'm not about setting myself up for failure. Quite the opposite actually.
But as I covertly stare at this blindingly stunning man walking in the opposite direction to me with his dog, maybe girlfriend and friends, I'm struck with the inclination to set myself a goal to start dating again.
Not a resolution that carries with it associations of previous inadequacy or failure in achieving said goal---though I haven't exactly been what one would call successful---but more so just a commitment to not continue locking myself away and ignoring possibilities like I have the past however many years, especially when there are people around that look as gorgeous as this one.
It's time I accept my past decisions, and get excited about the opportunity to make some new ones. Ones that are hopefully as healthy and positive as the one I made recently in ending my relationship and moving back to Byron Bay to experience and enjoy life alongside my friends.