Embracing Sunshine (Completed)

"Flicker of Hope 2"

"How is she Cole" kinakabahang tanong ko. Cole just had his daily check up with Elaine. The latter still unconcious.

"Her heart is unstable Francisco" humugot ito nang hininga. Alam ko na nahihirapan din siya gaya ko. Elaine is equally important to both of us.

"She really needs the operation ASAP or it will be too late, kamusta ang pakikipagusap mo kay Madison? Is there any progress?"

I shake my head. Ilang beses ko na syang pinuntahan, pinakiusapan pero ayaw talaga nito.

I know she has her own reasons kung bakit matigas ito sa pagtanggi. Alam ko din na naiinis na ito sa kanya but what can he do. He's also trying his best to save his happiness.

Cole patted my back and nodded his head letting me know that he understand me.

Nang umalis ito, I sat down beside Elaine's bed squeezed her hand. Stroke her hair and kissed her forehead.

"Kakayanin natin to. Lumaban ka lang. Alam kung nandyan ka lang. If you can hear me, please stay with me. Magiging mommy ka pa. Then you'll sing our children to sleep.  You will tuck them in every night and tell them all your funny stories." I smiled with the thought of having children. With her as the mother, sigurado akong magiging magulo, maingay at masaya ang bahay.

A place where he can finally say a home.

"You'll throw corny jokes and we'll pretend it's funny. Mag aaway pa tayo sa mga malilit na bagay and laugh about it when we grow older thinking how stupid we were so don't leave me please. Just hang in there, be strong"

_____

Kung maaari lang ay ayaw ko syang iwanan. I would spend the entire day, weeks or months beside her.  Holding her hand and telling her everything will be okay though sometimes I find it hard to convince my self either.

Everyday is torture seeing her unconcious pero kahit ganoon ay kaya ko. Kakayanin as long as her heart is still beating Alam kung may pag asa pa.

I had to go home for one day as her parents asked me to. Kahit isang araw lang daw ay makapagpahinga ako. Kahit ayaw ko na umuwi, I felt like I had to. Kahit lang man para sa mga magulang nya. They have been in so much stressed with her condition at ayaw ko na makadagdag sa mga alalahanin nang mga ito.

I know I look like shit. I know I'm a mess. I don't even have time to think for myself and I feel guilty kasi alam kung magagalit sya.

I thought of my deceased wife. I know she was happy when I moved on and accepted my feelings with Elaine. I know she will be happy kasi sya yung tipo nang tao na hindi marunong mag tanim nang sama nang loob at magalit. As long as everyone around her is happy she will be as well.

At long last I can say that I have moved on from my painful past pero bakit ganon? Oo nga at naka move on na ako sa past ko but my present is giving me agony as well.

I sigh. Well, at least this time is different. I've given a chance to cherish every moment with her.

Letting me know that our time is limited.

_____

What's happening? Why is everyone panicking?

I was not able to spend the whole day at home to rest. I was more restless kasi hindi ko sya nakikita and when I was in front of her room hindi nila ako pinapasok. Aligaga rin ang mga magulang nang dalaga.

"What happened, may nangyari po bang masama" I asked. Desperate for an answer.

She just shake her head and continued crying to her husband's shoulder.

Nahigit ko ang aking hininga. She didn't right? Hindi ngayon. She should not supposed to leave me this early.

I felt my chest tightening. This can't be happening.

"What happened. Please give me an answer". I pleaded on her father but got no answer.

I forcefully opened the door para malaman ang nangyari and the fuck! They are trying to revive her.

I was stunned. I couldn't move. It's like my life is being taken away from me.  Seeing them trying to bring her back, parang gusto kung magwala. Just the thought of losing her now is taking all my sanity away.

No....this can't be happening!

I felt someone grabbing my wrist and I just followed who that person is.  I don't know what to think or feel at the moment. Ni hindi ko nga alam ang gagawin ko sa buhay ko pag mawala ito.

When I saw who it was I saw Elaine's father.

Makikita mo sa mga mata nito ang pag alala but I know he had to be strong for his wife. His wife is depending on him to be strong for her.

"Her heart stopped beating for a moment" he said at alam ko na nahihirapan itong magsalita "and they are trying their best. Let them do their best on bringing her back to us Franciso. I know how much you love her, just trust on them. Trust on the Lord. Have faith"

I paced back and forth. I'm scared, I'm nervous. I punched the wall hard para maibsan ang frustration na nararamdaman ko.

God please help me! Please help her.  I know I have questioned you on multiple occasions but I'm really really desperate , desperate for miracle. Kung totoong nandyan ka please just for once , kahit ngayon lang please help us.

Like an answered prayer the door of her room opened.

"Kamusta sya. Kamusta ang Anak ko" her mother asked anxiously.

"We were able to revive her"

Sabay sabay kaming napabuntong hininga.  A sigh of relief.

"Maraming salamat. Thank you for saving her. Thank you for saving my daughter" her mother said, still crying.

"It's only for now" he continued "but I want to be honest with all of you, we don't have much time left here. She really needs the operation as soon as possible, if not we will really lose her for good." He gave all of us a sad smile.

" Please excuse me" then the doctor went on his way with his team.

We rushed immediately to her room and found her still peacefully sleeping. Unaware of all the things that happened.

Unaware that she gave us the most dreadful moment in our entire life.