Letter 20

89 8 0
                                    

Dear Chanyeol,

I don't know if God hears my prayers but after that incident, I saw you follow another girl on Instagram and she followed you back. I seriously need to stop checking up on you. It was no longer healthy for my emotional and mental health.

She looked pretty and smart. I expected myself to cry and regret about losing you, but I don't. I feel calm and happy because maybe you finally found the one for you. After you left, I had this understanding that I wasn't cool enough to be your boyfriend so when I saw someone deserving, I thought I was okay with that.

But that's the thing. After that, I couldn't sleep. I had troubles sleeping and I don't know if it was because of you or I just have too much things on my mind.

I saw you follow another girl again. So it was a clear sign that you were using a dating app. You were checking different people but all girls. It made me wonder why not men?

Am I just an experiment? That when you realized I'm not that, you'd go back to girls? That after dating me, you realized that women are better than men? Did you even love me, at all?

Or did you just use me to get over your ex? Was I just a rebound? What was I in your life? Was that the reason it was so easy for you to let go of me? The reason why you didn't even bother fighting for us?

As time goes by, my questions continued to grow. I started to wonder everything about our relationship because apparently you lied to me when we broke up. What else have you lied about, Chanyeol?

Letters to ChanyeolWhere stories live. Discover now