Time Capsule

Chapter 63

Time Capsule

Chapter 63

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Niall...

I didn't know where I was going. I don't even know what I was doing. All I knew is that I was not myself. My emotions were so fucked up at this point, that they almost became a completely new person that was controlling my actions. I  was not at all in control of myself, and that scared the shit out of me. I hopped into my car, that had been basically stationary in the hospital parking lot for the past month, and just fled from that cursed building as quickly as I could.

It was weird. It was almost like my body was angry, but my face was so sad. The tension in my face contorted as tears streamed down painfully, but my body was tense and quaking with such a deep rage.

Her heart stopped.

That damn doctors voice wouldn't stop swirling around my brain.

Her heart stopped.

I didn't even know why I just left the hospital. She could've been dead right now and I just left.

She probably is dead you moron. Her heart fucking stopped. What the fuck do you think that means?

I removed one hand from the wheel and tugged hard at my hair. "Shut up!" I shouted at the voice in my head that had been eating me alive.

You know I'm right.

"Just shut UP!" I couldn't fucking take this. I let out an almost animal sounding growl. All my anger, pain, and frustration was cemented into the sound. My brain all of a sudden became an echoing cave. It just kept repeating what I heard her say to me in my dream.

"Did you really think I'd love you after what you've done to me?!"

"You're a disgusting monster! How could anyone love you?!"

"You're pathetic."

I quickly pulled over to the side of the road, and hunched over the wheel, tugging my hair. "STOP!" I wailed. "PLEASE!" I already knew all of those things, but hearing her actually say it was a whole different story. Hearing those words come from her mouth, that hurt more than anything. Even if it was just a dream created version of her.

"You're a disgusting monster."

"SHUT UP!"

Fuck, I was losing my mind. If I thought I was being controlled by someone else before, when I left the hospital, I was really being controlled by someone now.

All of a sudden, everything just...stopped. My mind suddenly became an eerily silent hole, vacant of all emotions. I felt weird. A very dangerously calm weird. I almost felt like a zombie. Just so void of any emotion, that it was actually starting to scare me. I glanced to my right to notice that I actually pulled over next to a pub. Almost like a robot, I manually got out of the car, staring straight ahead, and started walking towards the entrance.

Niall, what the fuck are you doing?

I wasn't in control of my actions or thoughts anymore. I glanced around to see that the pub was fancier than most, and almost had a more club vibe going on.

Niall, are you stupid? Get the hell out of here! This is a bad idea.

I wasn't in control of myself when I started walking towards the bar.