something old, something new | taekook

Chapter 19: One Does Not Always Kill What They Keep

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They don't talk about the attack for a few days.

They don't even leave their room for the first day. Jeongguk doesn't push it, doesn't want to relive it, and Taehyung is certainly never going to pressure him otherwise. So, the first day is spent in each other's arms, reading to each other and curling up in front of the fireplace across the room.

By the third day, Jeongguk wakes up to his face in Taehyung's chest, his palm on his king's hip, and the other curled tight over his heart.

A nightmare.

His heart is still pounding, his breathing fast as his body tries to force itself to relax. He tries to tell himself he's safe but the thoughts won't leave. They're like little bugs crawling in his mind, chittering in his ear, nipping at his every thought. The only place he feels safe is in Taehyung's arms. He doesn't feel like the shadows are out to get him. He doesn't see faces in the darkness. He doesn't feel nails in his neck.

You are safe, little one, Taehyung murmurs, and Jeongguk slips his hand around Taehyung's back to pull him close. They lay together, legs tangled and fingers twined.

Correction- this is when he feels the safest. Jeongguk loves it. He loves how secure he feels like this. Taehyung blankets his body just the way he likes, his weight pressing him into the mattress.

When they're curled up like that, tangled so close together he doesn't know where he ends and Taehyung begins- that's when the memories start. When Taehyung's low voice asks if he wants to see something "beautiful" Jeongguk can't help but agree.

Taehyung shows him happy things. Memories he thought he'd forgotten.

Sooyoung telling him she was proud of him. The first time his baseball team won because of him. The first time he felt proud of his art.

But he shows him other things too. Memories that aren't even his.

The first time he sees a field of flowers, larger than he's ever seen before, in a country he's never been to before Taehyung kisses the corner of his mouth. A second to his nose, making him giggle. "My mother's favorite place," he says quietly, and Jeongguk's heart swells. These are Taehyung's memories. The things he holds close to his heart.

Then there was a beautiful view through a stained glass window ("the spire of my family's home,"), the serenity of a centuries-old library ("my father could spend hours there"), and then the soft droning of a much younger Seokjin's voice ("he still never shuts up,").

With every tiny piece of Taehyung's life, he gives a sweet kiss, his lips against the curve of his brow, the high point of his cheek, over the mole just under his lip.

"Thank you," Jeongguk whispers much later as the phantom scent of lavender fades from his mind.

Taehyung simply presses his face against his neck, kissing over his pulse. A soft thing, barely a brush of his lips. "Hm," He shifts, Jeongguk's hands slipping to his waist as he pushes himself up onto his elbows. "You don't have to thank me, precious," he murmurs, his voice still soft.

Jeongguk can only stare up at him, hands sliding up to rest over Taehyung's heart. His skin is warm under his hands. Taehyung's heart doesn't beat but he knows it would be racing if it did. He knows that when Taehyung leans in to kiss him again it would have skipped under his palm.

Jeongguk sighs into the kiss, hands continuing their trail until his fingers bury themselves in his hair. Lips parting under the soft glide of his tongue. "I missed you," he whispers and his voice cracks. "Missed you so much, Taehyungie."